The Happy Points

At this point of living, we tend to compare ourselves with others. Especially when it comes to personal life and achievements. It's normal when you hear someone speaks of "how bad" they feel when they see their peers seemingly have better lives compared to them. Especially in this era of social network, where most people use it to share what's happening in their lives; mostly about the good and happy things. So the older we get, the higher expectation people have of us and the easier that we see what's lacking and feel insufficient. So, is this how we should do it, at this point of living?

This is my opinion. Our mind is such a Trick Master. You can make it work for you, or against you. Our mind will do its work as long as we are alive. So if you fail to emphasize "what really counts" then you'll be spending your life getting busy over "what doesn't count". You know what counts? You and your happiness. Fullstop. If you bother about what's outside this, you are wasting your time dudes! Of course there will be attempts to disturb your peace. There will be attempts to make you try to adapt the thinking of others, and wondering why your life doesn't turn the way their lives do. And you start to feel down, why you don't have what they have. This is - clearly very wrong. I tell you why.

Acknowledge that your have your strong points. I can guarantee this. As long as you can feel the jolt of joy at any time of your days, that means something is going on right. Remember what you feel when you are engaging in some fun activities at work, or at home, and who do you like to spend your time with. You know you come this far in your life, locating the Happy Points in your life, and you have found them. You already know what makes you happy. So in full gratitude, you definitely cannot let anything tell you otherwise. Cos None of those outside your body knows better than YOU! How can you let someone who you never met in years, come to you and deny your Happy Points just because her Happy Points are not the same as yours? Who can tell you whose Happy Points are more correct than the others when this is Not about being correct, this is about true moments of experiencing purest joy that you don't need others to know and understand before you can experience them.So cut the crap, guys. Stop feeling bad!! If you Believe that you are a unique wonderful creation of God, you'll never waste another minute feeling sorry for being alive. In fact, it's the first thing that you are thankful for every morning after you wake up. 

Understand one thing that just because your life is not going at the same direction, it doesn't mean yours are less good. Not at all! If you are still lost in this kind of thoughts, you're wasting your seconds away. You should stand firm that your life is defined by Your happiness, and you don't have to explain to anyone. And lets say you do have to explain, the only way you should do it is with Pride. Pride because you are given such a miraculous chance to live a miraculous gift of life, something that are denied to a lot of people, something that a lot of people have to struggle for, something that a lot of people are on the verge of losing, and Look at you. You go by with your days alive and healthy, you have your smile and laugh, good and fun times with your loved ones - oh good Lord, you are having one kind of fine life, my dear! Please enjoy this life, enjoy it to the max, to the fullest and don't slow down at all. You want to maximize? I tell you. Have Gratitude in all the pleasant things! May you live well, and wish well for each other too. Alleluia!  

"All Or Nothing"

I found this poem on Valentine's Day morning, and decided it's a perfect poem to describe what I want to say, but could not find the simple words to put them in.

I'm sure all of us have the experiences of having a few people who loved us, but for all the wrong reasons. As a matter of fact, some of them really misused the word Love to describe their "anything but Not Love". So I'm sure, you will also like this poem so much. 

We want to be loved for a good reason. You will appreciate if people find you smart, witty, attractive etc but they forget that you will especially like it if they make the effort to Love you more than just your good qualities. Love you more than just the good times, or the good feelings that you can give them. You want them to sincerely care, and not just merely superficial. You want them to accept you as a human being, and not an idol who is without defects. You want them to understand that it's as much as you expect from them, you are willing to do the same to them. So I guess, this is a good poem for you to dedicate to all the people who Have Love You Wrongly.

Cos as much as it gives you a good feeling that lasted for a while, you don't just want it to be just that long. You want it to be longer than that. Then you know, at one time, you are almost sure that if you knew it won't last so long, you would rather not have started it. A relationship not based of unconditional love, Can't Survive. And the battle doesn't just end there. Marriage is where the reality will finally show its true colours. So if you got rid of these people, you should be thankful instead. Provided that you've been praying for your relationship, God is saving you from the worst that could have taken place. Raise your hand in thanksgiving. God has something better for you. Have faith. *winks

Humans & Devastation

Do you guys notice that it's a good day until you start to ruin it. If you look around you, things are still the same but you can be boiling in your own hot oil and the next thing, you are officially devastated. Sometimes you can't even explain how it happens, how it starts. 

Why do humans have to be so fragile? Why do we let ourselves be that fragile? Why even simple words which are not even given much thoughts by those who speak them, cause us pain. Sounds familiar? And there goes another magnificent day. You ruin it just like that.

Sometimes when something like this happens, you try all you can to knock senses into you.You try to pinch yourself, "hey hey come on dudeee...why are you acting this way?" Something is just not right about this. You can't blame the system. You can't blame the biology, or chemistry, or physics. You just can't. It's your own doing. All yours.

It doesn't matter if we can't explain what it is. But why do we allow it? Repeatedly that we take the knife and stab it right to the heart, and start moaning in agony. Do we actually enjoy this? Ah, much riddles again.  

So humans. I believe that we can do better than this. I believe that instead of just holding the remote control, we can actually start really doing the button pressing out of our own will. Not others'. Promise to do better. And do not allow yourself to be devastated for all the stupid reasons out there. You are a miracle. You are far greater than this. You must celebrate your greatness, and the magical life you are allow to have. Ah. Thank you God. You are just...beyond words. Lets us not forget your presence. And the reason why there are just two footprints during our difficult times, it's because you are lifting us. Thank you again. Amen. 

That Aura Of Yours

Google defines Aura as the distinctive atmosphere that seems to surround generated by a person, thing or place. In this case, it's a person, and that person is You.

Do you know that when you are around some people, you can feel "something different"? Like you can sense the presence of a special vibe around you. That will create some kind of attraction. I don't know what's the logic behind that and I don't want to google some more. Lets just make it raw.

Some people claim that certain people they meet, Have that Aura. Which means, not everyone. What causes that? Does that mean someone who is goodlooking will automatically have that aura? Or is it from self presentation, body language and stuff like that? I remember that a few of my guyfriends that I know from chatrooms told me that I have this aura whenever I entered the chatroom. If they saw that my nick was there, or the moment my nick entered the chatroom, they could feel that aura and that made the whole channel felt a bit different. LOLS. Okay, of course not to be taken seriously. It doesn't matter if they meant it or not, cos I was not expecting anything like that. The point is, without even knowing how the person looks like, just with nicknames and typewritten words, one can actually decide that "he/she has that aura". Can we fake that aura? or learn it by experience? Ah, I don't plan to google on this too. Hahahaha.

Lets just assume that all of us have That Aura. Just that not everyone can feel it. Lets just assume it has sthing to do with different energy or vibration that don't really go along, and once they do, then only we can feel that aura. I prefer to put it that way. And I believe that from whatever factors that I have mentioned, a bit of everything actually affects your aura. If lets say many people agreed that you have that aura, but what if one day you go out messy, unbathed, ungroomed, going to a totally new crowd, Do you think they will get your aura? They can't even stand to be around you, let alone finding out more about you. So you know, doesn't matter if you have it or not, your appearance does affect your energy. You can be good looking but if you look so discouraged, defeated and low of self esteem, I don't think that Aura can make a point for anyone to take you seriously.

I did a bit of demo today. Since a while, I did not really care about my appearance. Cos to me work is my priority and it's about getting a job done. I didn't care how I do my hair and I just clipped it during lazy days. I wore the same thing on few days rotation cos I didn't want to look fancy and I thought I'd leave it for special days. But that really brought my energy down without me knowing. As much as I felt spirited to go through the day, I did not get the energy going when I could feel that I took my appearance for granted. So today I dressed like it was one of the special days. It felt different, seriously! I guess, self appreciation is another thing. When you know you are worthy, you act like you are that worthy, and you seriously mean that you know you are worth it, you'll create this positive vibe around you, in every movement that you make. And it doesn't matter if no one tells you that you have that aura, you just know that you Have It. :)

So if you are concerned about your Aura, just think of the word Positive, wear it on yourself, I guess nothing can beat that kind of Aura. So guys, lets "contaminate" your surrounding with your aura today! 

*giggles

How Much Politeness Is Possible?

Speaking of being polite at work, I do respect my customers. I do treat them nicely and friendlily as much as I can afford to. But then I have a few awkward people who come just like my other customers but they are not really my customers. I rather keep it "straight to business" when it comes to work. So to me, if you try to go hanky panky, I call that "crossing the line". I have some of them tried to act so funny by getting me in a long conversation just to ask me out or tell me tales that is outside the border of work talk. Not enough with that, it got me really uncomfortable when suddenly I thought that I became a "victim" in my own place - having to endure so much dramas from people who are just Too Free. Sorry if I start to sound irritating. Hahaha.

There is this particular one guy, who really pissed me off recently. Everytime when he came, I talked nicely to him cos at first, he looked like he was "the faithful type" who listens to his wife cos I don't like flirty guys. His wife is my customer too. He happened to drop by so often just to chit chat with me since last year. For quite some time I thought he was so genuinely asking these questions so I just answered the best I could. Only after a while I noticed that he was just making topics to have a conversation. And the painful part is that, he made me waste so much time just to be polite to him. Due to how often he dropped by, I had to answer all his questions (which mostly are just to fill in the blanks) I became this human robot who has the obligation to answer to the most nonsense questions like, "What are you doing? Why do you draw the line like that? Are you doing work? Is it urgent? bla bla bla O-MY-Gee Spare Me!!! You don't come to my place and question why I am working, that is my workplace, darn it!!! (Hahahahahahaha) So I still could stand those questions at first, not until he started to show his true colour. He started to comment on what I wear, he started to compliment me, and I saw how he looked at me from head to toe while I was busy trying to get a job done, and he just sat there making me feel like a puppet. It was when I shifted his category to the guys who are into harassing the ladies just with their words. Sorry, that is NOT SO DECENT to me. Just yesterday he dropped by and I was having my Nasi Ayam at 4 PM and he saw that I did not really welcome him so he started questioning "Why are you having nasi ayam at 4 PM, is that your normal lunch time? bla bla bla bla bla) Tell me, isn't this too much? What should I do to people who don't respect the line? When you see I am working, and I am in my own place, and you are NOT even my customer, nor my friend, you just come because you are too free and I have to entertain you like I have nothing better to do. 

I know I sound quite rude by saying this. I know this is not how we treat another person. But I have this concept that if a person starts to disturb your peace and comfort and they don't even care about it, I think that I shouldn't be so polite anymore. How long should I wait until I run out of patience and just let my own comfort disrupted by the people who have other things to do but choose to disturb you. So I told him, Sorry I have to do some work. Can you please wait outside? (since he always uses the excuse that he's waiting for someone). So really. We can't avoid from dealing with people who get on our nerve  right? As much as we know we should treat people nicely, but sorry, we have our limits too. And none of us are perfect. I have to do sthing to show him that I am not comfortable so I have to speak up. I feel bad if I hurt anyone but I don't have much choice. You can do anything on your own. You want to dress like a Batman, or wear a wig, or wear your wife's highheels, I won't judge you or think bad of you but when you start to involve me in your behaviour then I have the right to feel offended. Whoa, I can feel some heat coming out from my both ears now. Hahaha. So okay. Lets not do this, okay?

I noticed that I did the same kind of "harassment" on this guy at work by asking him all the silly questions thinking that he wouldn't mind answering, such as, "Do you know what kind of soup flavour they use of the Pan Mee on that restaurant? He got quite pissed with questions like that. So right away I noticed that I could be doing it too much. Hahahahaha. You see? Sometimes we do that and we don't even know. So please be a bit sensitive. This is what we do to fit around people. So if we care about our public relation, we will not continue doing things that offend others. We will straight away change our ways. Please make it easier for people to be polite to us, that's fair and square, right? 

Note: Don't ask for politeness, show them you deserve it!

The Guy And The Balls

Most guys (even some girls) are very much into football. When there's a match as early as 2 AM, they rather stay up or set their alarm clock to wake them up. Yeah, sometimes they are more discipline when it comes to be on time for a football match on tv more than they be on time for work. Hahaha. Kidding. Not to mention when you saw them start to get all heated up arguing about who's the best player, and when they chant for their team, you see a very genuine emotion of - I am not sure what - but yeah, this is about guys who love football. Sometimes it's football first, and everything else second. When you used to see this scenario at home, and then at school, and then at work - suddenly you become like me, who needs to write something about it. What you are feeling inside is a bit of irritated - and fed up - and "gosh I had enuff of seeing this!!" Hahahaha. 

So okay, keep it sweet and simple, shall we. Actually to your surprise (which used to be mine too...haha) you could actually find guys who are NOT like that. And mind you, they are not "the softies" like most of you might guess. They are as manly as can be. Just that, they have very little addiction to football. They'll rather spend the night talking to you than watch any match, even if it's World Cup. Suddenly you get that strange feeling, Eh, doesn't everyone talk about a football match tonite? And why is he here? So you know you found the rare ones. So, would you prefer this rare type or you would not mind having your man have their most rewarding hours attending to football match. Of course you wouldn't mind. If it's only for an hour or two, you would not mind Not getting between your man and football. But wait. It doesn't just happen there. It will affect them in other things too. They'll get really fanatic about their favourite footballer. They will buy expensive jersey that has their footballer's name and number even if they have to save money for it; buy the brand that sponsors their team etc. Try to say something less encouraging about their favourite footballer and they'll become the power ranger who will back up until they think you have learn your lesson. Hahaha.

So okay, what I mean is, now you know WHY I find it lucky to find a few of them who are NOT like that. If this guy happens to be your man, you can rest assured you won't feel silly when he picks football over you. And of course, you'll feel even more special when the rest of the football fans are getting all crazy screaming in front of the tv, and he's rather spend the time with you, just talking nothing, in a more peaceful manner. Phew, imagine what kind of stress you are spared from. Hahaha. So just in case you ask, Yes, I would prefer guys who are not into footballs. I think that they have so many kinds of distractions already, and this football thing will only add one major one. At certain point, you are still lucky if your man loves football but still never puts football before you. Rather than having one who is Not into football, and not even put your as priority, uh-oh, then you know maybe it's not always Football that gives problem, but it's his own attitude. Maybe I just said the Whole Point what this is all about. Hahahaha. Football or Not, don't let it take too much of your time and attention till you forget that footballs don't know you and don't care about you, but your woman does. Hahaha.

Note: I rather just wake the next morning and read the football match result. Unless David Beckham cares if I go through all the sleepless night just to watch him at the field kicking a ball. LOLS. Woops :PP

Just When You Think 5 Years Isn't That Long

5 years... What first comes to your mind? Is it long? Or is it short? I bet, depending on what age you are now, 5 years can sound quite short. Especially when you think of where you were 5 years before and where you are today. You don't really see the difference. So you decided that, Nopes, 5 years is short, O-My-Gee!! And you start to get panic when you see that you have not even reached your goal and you'll be at certain age in 5 years. Must be pretty alarming.

Guess what, I could be one of them who thought so, but that's just for a while. Until I recall back what could happen in 5 years to change what I think about being "not so long". Lets see. I remember this old makcik came to my place and started talking. She said that her daughter was once my customer. I was surprised. I couldn't remember which one, but she said, "that time she was still in Form 3," which was 15 years old. Then she added, "Now she's in the university". I was like, Seriously?? Form 3 was still a kiddo age, and now she's a grown up lady and gonna enter the job market soon. Garsh, 5 years can't be that short, right? Then I remember my other customers who were once schoolkids, some came back to my workplace when they were on industrial training to be a teacher. Gosh. From early teenagehood now they are going to be adults. 5 years can do that. Not that long, you say?

Now look at a senior friend of mine whom I know around 5 years before. We could still sit at the same table having lunch together, but she isn't what she was 5 years before when I first met her. 5 years ago, her hubby was this one nice Bruneian guy, and they were among the happiest couples around. Sadly, on the 3rd year knowing her, the husband divorced her and she went through the most difficult time of her life when she had to move out from the husband's house and she got no place to stay. She had to sleep at her office for 6 months, and only a year ago she got remarried to a Muslim Chinese guy, she has a place to stay and she's no more heartbroken. But she's still the same lady, having lunch beside me.  If you miss those five years and only meet today, you wouldn't know how much she went through. And how much pain she had survived.

Also another friend of mine since secondary school. She used to keep looking for the right guy and kept failing. And how she changed from one boyf to another for that  quest. She had many relationships with married men after she went to meet the fortune teller in Thailand about her destiny with married man. Guess what, 5 years ago she was stuck in a toxic relationship that she had to abort the baby she had from the guy who was married and did not want the baby. And today, she's a happy mother of 2 kids after she  finally married with guy who just lost his wife to cancer. In the end, she found the solution to her situation without having to hurt another woman's heart. In 5 years, she got both mistakes and solutions. 

So if you ask me, is 5 years long or short? I definitely will say, How can it be short when life's uncertainties can happen in a year or two, and now you are talking about five. Of course many things can be failed, can be accomplished and achieved during that long duration! So if you think you have not "moved" for the past 5 years, it's time to make a move. You can have your long list of plans solved and achieved one by one! Never Underestimate what 5 years can do cos ANYTHING can just hop into your hand and be yours, even on the few months before that 5 years. Who knows? You can forget about doing the maths and busy getting happy and grateful for every breath that we take, do your best and appreciate every moment being alive. So to the coming 5 years, lets meet again in 5 years and see how much difference that we have collected! After all said and done, this gift of life must be lived the best we know how. Good luck, guys! 

Sorry Routines, I Got You Ripped Off!!

Speaking of routines, for how long that you are stuck doing the same routines? Lets put, 2 years? 5 years? Or is it 10 years? That is freaking longggg. Are you or are you not fed up with those routines? 

I notice something that I was stuck with the same routine for 5 years! Imagine that! And guess what, I never actually planned to change the routines, until something happens and then the next thing, I have ripped them off! What, isn't 5 years enough? 

These days, I have time to watch tv. For all the years I have my tv at my workplace, I never actually make use of it except for Sundays. I remember telling myself, I must have missed lotsa nice forums or talkshows, some really good home deco shows or dramas and other things; things that I enjoy watching. I mean, I got a lot of inspirations from watching a good tv show. Without me knowing, I am starting to include that in my routine now. Back then I spent too much time going online. Even at work, I was always at the chatroom, and chatrooms aren't getting busier. I had that silly routine to just be around at the chatroom seeing a silent chatroom, peep everytime, and nothing fruitful. Only a few fun chats once in a while, which happened only once or twice in months. Without planning, I have passed that habit out of convenience because suddenly I realize that my work needs a lot more attentions, and I don't have enuff hands on them so I should do something about it. I don't have to get my eyes glued on the tv, and at the same time, I have my work done. I don't go online during the day surfing the net, just enough with Facebook for the latest news and get up to date with my friends, business and others which I can do through my phone. I will surf the net to download important things when I am at home after work. That's a pretty new way of doing things but I am adapting. Not bad, so far.

Now I have more restime at night. Altho my sleep hours don't sound right because of the 2-hour evening nap that breaks my sleeptime into two parts. But I guess, I have more things done and I have the choice to do more chores, instead of just giving excuses that "I don't have time, sorry". Darn it. Our routines actually take our time selfishly and some of them don't even benefit us, so why do we still keep them?

So if you think your routines have been holding you back from maximizing your life, you too should do something about it! I guess that, whatever we do, we do for the betterment and progression of our personal life. Only we know what works on us. Maybe with the change of routines, we can actually be wiser in thinking, and we create more rooms for improvements. I believe that. So, lets make this Year of Horse a year of "self-improvement" in a bit more aggressive way, hopefully that we achieve twice or thrice in self development too! Run, run like the horse and may we accomplish wonderful things this year!

Is Something Wrong That I Don't Miss School?

When I saw some parents sending their kids to school, I look at the kids and saw that blue pinafore, or orange school bus, pheww. I am seriously not missing school. LOLS. Ah, why is that?

Those pinafores and orange school buses are just among the things that remind me of schooldays. I remember having to wake up really early, when it was still very dark. How could a toddler me handle it that time? It was so much pressure having to dress neatly, ironed my clothes everyday, putting thick haircream to my hair so it could look neat etc. That uptight feeling to be at the classroom, not to make too much noise, or when the teacher asked me a question I didn't know, the risk of getting laughed at by my friends etc. Plus, I dislike the feelings when I had to put too much constraints to myself so the teacher would not be angry at me. 

By the way, I do remember the good things. I remember my playfulness and carefreeness. Worrying about nothing like what adults like us worry about. I do remember my glorious days as the respected student, how I got my flying colours results, how I got congratulated, how I became the prefect, and the only girl class monitor, Yeah...they will remain as my sweetest memories. But then, if you ask me to repeat those days, I'd say No, once is enuff.

Now when I saw my teacher friends with their workloads and neverending complaining about student performance, I feel a bit dizzy. Hahaha. They remind me of schooldays again. Deep inside I feel So Relieved that those school things are behind me. Uni years, ah, I don't miss them either. LOLS. Especially the pressure to make presentation at the front, or the stress during examinations. Just thinking of all the tension, I could just throw out. Seriously. 

Of course, one thing that I miss is the good times with the friends. Schooldays are like the arena for friendship memories. But still, if you ask me, it's not enough to make me want to go back to schooldays. I guess that it has done its time, and enough is enough. So when I look at those students and parents when they are nervous about PMR/SPM results, it makes me even sure that I DON'T miss schooldays!! No Thanks! Hahahahaa

It's funny when I can find myself saying, Thank God, schooldays are over for me!!! One reason I can figure out is that, I just love what I am doing right now. My life is really far from perfect, not even close to good to some people, but I can manage having this kind of freedom doing what I do best, doing my choice, and I don't have to consult and be too careful with my decisions like before. I can just go out there and get a bit crazy with taking chances and explore possibilities. 

To those who are still at school, no matter what I said about it, one thing for sure, schooldays are one of the most important phases in someone's life, so now you are creating a part of yourself that you gonna bring with you. So you must do your best and enjoy building your personality. While you are still at it, Do Your Best! Lets hear from you when you finally leave schooldays like us, I'm sure you have better things to say! Hahaha. Go score with flying colours!

The Logic Of Getting Good Rest, Now Not Tomorrow

I was having stuffy nose since last Thursday. I knew it that it was caused by too much coldness at the office. I have issues with the temperature lately and just that day, I turned the fan to 5 and I was too busy talking to a friend and I let the coldness got to me. I got stuffy nose just after I went out of the office that evening. So that was how I got the disease. Stuffy nose doesn't sound like anything serious, does it?

But it affected me quite badly too. Runny nose at night. Difficulty in breathing. Fever. Darn. So luckily it was CNY holidays so I gave myself 2 days off. I managed to cook our CNY lunch without having to infect everyone with the virus, cos the disease kind of laid off during the mid day so the runny nose stopped for a while. I made sure that all the utensils were clean after using them. When it was night time again, I started to get dizziness and I could not be as hyper as I always was. So I should spend sometime at work during Sunday to get some works done, but I did not. I also did not go to church today. My family thought it was just another lazy day for me, but no, it's more than just that.

Even tonite, I did not touch any of my work. I have loadsa deadlines by next week, and why the heck didn't I start doing them? I spent my whole day, sleeping, cooking a bit and then sleeping again, without guilt. I always know that health is more important than anything else, in the long run. If I don't get enough rest, I might prolong my illness for a few more days, and guess how many works will get delayed or not done well? So, it's okay to sacrifice some time to HEAL. No matter what kind of guilt you have when you spend the whole day sleeping instead of doing anything progressive, but the answer is NO. Without your health, you are not 100% in your brain performance, not just physical. So more will be affected the longer you become sick.

So dear friends. Remember that all the money you have will not mean  a darn thing when you are not healthy enough to spend them. You gotta be healthy first before you can function well as a human being. Go get the rest and wake up as a healthy person. Be healthy especially for your loved ones. Your existence means a lot to them. Go go get some sleep now!

Win The Race, You Wooden Horse!

A Year Of Determination and Strength, says this source where I got this picture from. If you ask me, if I do believe in Chinese horoscope or any horoscope for that matter, the answer is always the same. Not really. I did get some inspiration from the predictions, but I am always right about one thing. That those predictions WILL NOT COME TRUE, unless you go ahead and make it happen with your own hands! So, if you are the type who are into predictions, it's not wrong, but make sure you write notes on the good things from what the predictions say gonna happen to you. And do not let the bad things haunt you and give you nightmares! They are not there to ruin your life but to help you improve it! 

But again, I feel good for this Wooden Horse year. If you ask me why? Maybe it's because of the word Hope. I wake up everyday with this word Hope getting bigger each time. All the times that has passed, imagine how big my Hope has become. Hahaha. Okay, that's a big exaggerated. What I mean is, Hope undergoes quite a critical process too. If only we don't lose them along the way, they would have grown so big. But sadly, sometimes we lost it to failures and disappointments. If we manage to build a new one, it starts growing from there again. The one I have right now, is a strong one. It has endures so much things and still manage to survive. Sometimes I thought I wanted to lose it again, but somehow that Hope manages to cling to me saying, 256, Don't Lose Me. It's tough without the help from God. You guys know I will say that, right :))

I wish everyone a better year. Seriously. Cos I wish that you guys will return me the same greeting too. Hehe. Lets wish well for everyone. I know that we will have our ups and downs, we will have our days of glory, and of defeat, but we gonna keep the good vibe going. This is just part of the universe, don't defy it. Let it go on and we will turn every happenings into winnings. Lets try make that happen, guys. Come on! 

So lets just take example from the characteristic of a horse, if you may, and run and run till we reach our goal. Believe in yourself, believe in God above, and keep your thoughts positive! Best of luck!

When You Decide That Someone Is Just Not Your Class

Whoa. Sounds cocky, right? Lets decide how cocky can it be.

Well, we meet a lot of people in our life. They don't always be at the same wavelength as us. As much as we wish we are that compatible, it's not always the case. So maybe that's called Chemistry? Can we just "create chemistry" or it must be exist naturally?

Well, honestly, I am not as friendly as I sound in the cyberworld. Or maybe, even in cyberworld you can guess that I am not that friendly. And please don't think I am proud of that. To be friendly is a good thing, who doesn't want to be friendly? The more friendly you are, the more people will like you. So I guess this is just who I am. So I don't really have plenty of experience trying to work out friendship with people. So to this small bunch of people, I notice that, as much as I do like them, the idea to work it out more than  hi and bye friends is Not always viable. Lets see why.

First, some people who want to be close to us don't always have with the right kind of intentions. In other words, when you expect sincerity from people. it's not what they are happy to give you. Second, without knowing their intention, sometimes they just have this barrier in communication. Sometimes their level of thinking is just not up or down to your level. You two become the chicken and the duck who try so hard to get along but can't understand each other well. My level of thinking is not much, but if you talk to people who are still talking about ideas of 10 years backward and is not up to date, garsh, how are you gonna keep the conversation alive? And you know it's Not their fault. Just how some people think they like me but they think I am just way tooo talkative it annoys them to death, they know it's not entirely my fault too. It's just bad, right? When two people who like each other, find too many differences that they can't blame each other for, and they can't just go along with it anymore. It's sad, I know. 

I remember having a conversation with a guy who thinks highly of himself. He always think that people around him are mostly stupid. So when we finally talk, he keeps telling me that I am different from the people he knows. I am just way up their level. No, I am not flattered altho it's pleasant to hear. Why? Cos it's not what I want. I don't enjoy getting flattered as much as I enjoy seeing possibilities that we can be goodfriends that can last. How he is too full of himself just makes me sick. If only he's not like that. But can I blame him for being himself? That's reality, right, people? How can we change people from being themselves?

We want to make lots of friends who can click with us, but it's just not possible sometimes. Some people are just too pushy. Some people are just trying to forcefully get into your private stuff that you just Uncheck their names right away. But still, I know it's not their fault too. So, this is what's happening. But you guess it, what I really dislike from are BAD INTENTIONS. No matter what kind of good words you said or good things that you did, but in the end when you unmask your real intentions, THAT'S IT.

Conclusion is... If you ideally match someone without having to hold your breath, without having to torture your brain, you Must treasure this person. You know you'll come across thousand and one failures in locating some that really match you. You have your class, they have theirs. You know some people are just in your league. Hope you find more of these people, good luck!

Undelete The *Deleted*

Ah. Just a funny thought. Imagine when you receive a text from someone. Or, maybe reading a Facebook post by a friend. What's the first thought that comes to your mind? And then, compare it with what you actually Enter for others to read? Any similarities? Or none at all? Hahaha.

I bet the answer is, Almost NONE at all!

Usually our first genuine reaction is totally unfiltered. It can be a bit too much for others to take, or maybe we just caught in the middle of it and don't know how to finish it well, so we delete, one word, two words, the whole line, and then, Everything!

I remember receiving this Whatsapp message from someone, and I wanted to say so many things to let her know what I think of the subject that she raised. Sometimes like, "Oh. It looks so nice! Remember when you said that ....bla bla bla"... suddenly I thought if I were to continue with it, I was gonna end up typing longer, and garsh, I thought I didn't have time for that so I deleted everything and typed "Okayy" then Enter. Hahahaha. 

Same thing with Facebook post. I bet at first, we wanted to say what we really thought, but then as we typed, many things started to knock our sense. It might offend some people; or get misunderstood, or make people get the wrong idea about you etc. All that stuff!! And the next time, you are down with one word if not a few. Hehehe. It's so funnyy! Some rather settle for cliches like "Good one, Nice!, Very true." The safest comments in the whole wide world! Hahahaa

I have this one Fb buddy who I caught posting comments of his "first hand thought". Which if I didn't respond fast enough, he deleted them. It happened for so many times. Hahahaha. Sometimes when it was in the form of question, some people got embarrassed when they are not answered right away, so they would look ignored and feel silly. So, they rather delete the question so others won't find out that they are "ignored". LOLS. Ah, we think too much, right? 

Sometimes it's just too funny I wish I could see what people wrote before they deleted them and ended up writing just what entered! Hahaha I'm sure it's just hilarious. Yeah, just pretend I am that free. Hehe. Ok guys. Whatever it is, if you think you gonna post sthing that gonna raise some issues or sentiments, take your sweet time before you press Enter. You don't have it to be too late, or you don't want to get caught deleting them, right? Cos some people are more active on observing than they allow you to see...hehe. (This I know for sure! Hahaha) So, I guess you don't deserve another embarrassment or if you just wanna have fun, okay, go ahead. LOLS. But never ever risk this when you are writing to your loved ones whose hearts you have to take care a bit more, okayyy. Hehe. Ok deal!