Friday, December 18, 2015

My Life As A Listening-Booth-No-More



I know that I've become the listening booth for so many years. All the years, I enjoyed doing it. I thought that it really balanced my talkativeness. I enjoyed listening to people and their situations, especially when they really needed my opinions. The thing is, there are these people who "abuse" the listening booths around them. They see them as...what, a thing instead of a person? Like, "if I have something to say, I say it and you listen". "It's an order!!" And they go tailing you making you feel bad for not doing your "job" this time. Suddenly it's not anymore a friendship thing. They become clingy and want to talk about anything to you, just to have ears, and after that, they just forget about it. Yeah, you heard it right.

Not that I grow to be heartless, but come on, if you become "abusive" like that, you're just lucky that the machines can't walk away. If they could, they would walk out on you too. Some people don't need humans, cos they already made up their mind. They know and think they are smart enough. They already know the answers to all their questions. They don't need your friggin opinions. They only need an entity to be there to listen to their ranting and "no thanks I'm not interested to hear anything from your side". Not only it's a one-sided conversation, it's totally selfish too. Like, "Oops, time's up I have something to do.", when you sacrifice your time for them, you make time for them just for it to go with the wind. Seriously, some people need is not a human listening booth but a coin-operated one. Seriously!

I'm slowly leaving my "part-time" job as a listening booth. Not that I become less caring, but I realize that the less and less deserving I am to give people advice. My own mind is already too cluttered to even give some quality opinions, I can't think for people when I'm dealing with many real life issues myself. I do miss those days when some people came to me and thanked me that they got something good and solved their problems from following my advice and opinion. I miss those days really. But I rather leave them in my good memory than to continue becoming one just for the wrong people to misuse it. 

*Hangs a CLOSED sign at the door.
 
Just let this one listening booth rest. :))

Saturday, December 12, 2015

What FREEDOM Is To Me




FREEDOM is such a big word. It's when you do what you feel like, what you feel right. That no matter if people demand you to do and become, you simply do and become what you want, how you want it and it doesn't matter what they say. At first, people might think different of you. They might not approve you or agree with you. But when you keep on exercising that freedom, eventually they'd wish they have done the same thing from the start. Cos you make them see that how you choose to live your life, is you taking charge of the only power you are given, that is only YOU can live YOUR LIFE the best. And NO option is better than that!

To be honest, I never really be-friend-ed with the word FREEDOM to describe it as something that I've been doing for myself. But after all the years becoming this person I am today, I finally found that THIS IS THE WORD I've been putting into practice. The question is not about, What is it that people usually like? Instead, it's a statement of This is what I like.

Remember how many times people bother you about their opinions. Yes I do get affected. I know I can't stop people from criticizing me, but I don't have to know their every disagreement with me. I get pissed off whenever people tell me that my hair is too messy and that I should get a haircut, or my haircolour is just too loud that "Oh, I won't wear that colour for my kind of job", "Oh, why do you wear that?" "Oh, is this your job? Are you sure you are not wasting your degree?""Oh I think you'll look much better that way, than this way". All these will wear you down. Do you know that you can meet 10 people with 10 different opinions of you? They will not stop giving you extra voice, and they can easily make your own voice sink. If you think people's opinion is better than your own, you are still far from Freedom.  

My approach is that, when it comes to my life, I Know Better. That's why I still follow my stubborn unpopular ways of living my life. What I know nobody gets in trouble because of it, that's enough concern I have for them. To the people who have high expectations of me and how my life will turns out, well, they will have to deal with it cos I'm living my way this way, anyway. I've been through that chapter that "Nobody understands what I'm doing and why" and so I have anytime become a subject to their judgment and prejudice. Can you manage to go through this chapter, while still holding your values? Without being shaken? The reward is waiting for you. Cos after you go through that chapter Unshaken and Not ashamed of it, people will finally Get It. When they deal with tough situation trying to determine their life, you can easily be their inspiration. They'd wish they have that courage. It's not easy to claim your Freedom. It's you against the world. But once you found it, you know you accomplish something RARE. Only the most courageous can claim it. FREEDOM is only for the people who take charge of their own life.

I hope you be one and tell your story one day :))

Hitleap

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