Saturday, April 23, 2016

You'll Never Go Broke By Giving

I learn something valuable today. Not new, but it takes a while to really accept this. That no one gets poor by giving. The logic is, if you give everything you have and left with nothing, doesn't that mean you get poor by giving?

This friend of mine is surrounded by people who keeps asking her for money assistance. She always complains to me that she only has a few red notes and her friends or family are asking for help. She has that extra empathy that makes her the victim of people who take advantage of her kindness. But she ends up giving them whatever she has, thinking that, What if they really have nothing to eat?

But then she shows me how it works. She always gets back even more than what she gives. Then she has more to give to others, and no matter how bad her situation is, she always has ways to survive them, and then she receives even more from her sources of business. She gets new customers, old customers come and make payment, stuff like that. But ocassionally she forgets this too. She will go back to feeling of being taken advantage, and not happy to give. But then she still ends up giving. Whatta giver!

Then she keeps reminding me that Money that comes to our hands, do no belong in our hands. They are meant to go around from one hand to another, pass it to a person in need. That person will pass that money to someone else that helps the person in a way, also by passing it to another hand. In the end, everyone gets what they need from the money being passed around. As long as you are in this passing money circle, the money will always come back to you. Or go ahead and believe this is just God's work. You will never go broke if you serve your purpose of helping another. You don't believe? Try it and believe it :)

Saturday, April 16, 2016


We keep hearing about internet lovescam; women losing money to guys they know from the internet. This is not a new thing. But we still hear new cases like this. Don't you wonder why women still fall for the same old lies? I have a friend who is totally in this scenario now. The internet guyfriend keeps asking for money. They never even meet. She kinda likes the guy because he often sends her religious sharings, jiwang songs that make her float in her own wonderland. Guess what, she gives. RM30, RM50, whatever she has. And then he also asks for credit top-up, to which phone, which network, she will quickly go and buy one. At the same time, the friend always complains not having enough money for her own. So, it's not like "she's in the position to donate".

I'm 100% sure, you who read this will say, Sorry la kalau sia. Satu sen pun tu lelaki nda akan dapat. Right. My reaction is exactly that. Guess what, she's not stupid. She's aware of a foolish situation she's in. But whenever the guy says he has no money to buy foods, she feels pity of him. She knows he could be lying, but she always thinks, what if he doesn't. Recently, the guy asks her to invest in an online business, which needs thousands. She doesn't have that money. Guess what, she silently asks around for the money so that she could join the business.

If you ask me what do I do as a friend? I keep telling her she's looking for trouble. She agrees but she has a B answer for why she must do it. She always picks her B answer - despite thanking me for reminding her, despite agreeing that I'm right, despite knowing through her own judgement what she gets herself into. She's totally awake, I tell ya! 

One day, I asked her. Why is it that you are unreasonably too generous to a person you don't even know? Why, so you hope that he likes you as much as you like him? What it is really?
She was surprised at my question cos she never actually speaks of the reason. After a while, she answered, Maybe because I want that our relationship to last. I'm not ready to lose him yet. Yes, just like anyone would imagine the victims of lovescam are mostly Lonely women. She's lonely emotionally. The guy makes her feel good because she finally finds someone she can talk to like how she would want to talk to a man dear to her. For the time being, she knows that:

1. She might never meet the guy at all since he's from a different state 
2. The guy might be using her just as a gold mine
3. She's the victim of an internet cheater who use only words to lure women but not proof of honesty yet
4. He might never mean anything good that he said to her
5. He's been lying about so many things including his identity

You see, she doesn't have that much trust in this guy either. But in the end, she always picks to be the victim. Whenever they argue, she asks me, "Do you think he will leave quietly and never talks to me again? I said, Either one of you who decides to quit this, the losing one is always you. You are already on the losing part judging from how much money you spend on this guy. 

Trust me I tried many times to knock some senses into her, and she told me she's totally aware. But I understand that: Women are only the same in gender but they are very different from one another. Some women do have overpowering empathy towards others. More than any consciousness about anything else. My friend is in that category. Despite everything, should she get nothing from this internet fling, she decided that all the money that she gives the guy is out of Sincerity. And she rather be called, "The most foolish woman on this earth." cos "Only God knows my intention."

Isn't it adorable when a woman falls for someone? Their emotion will be bigger than their brain. It's not wrong. But I tell her, "If only you do this to the most deserving man." To her, he is that man for now. She expects to find someone better but for now, he's still the one. So I can imagine, how exactly women who got scammed by their internet lovers. Don't think they are so foolish. They are not. Some women would give it all to find out IF IT COULD WORK OUT. It could probably not work out but What If it does? They need to find out and all the material possessions won't trade that possibility that they finally finds the right one. We all have different limits and some women, the limit is till they almost left with nothing.

My question is, Does Love Pay The Bills? Money does. So forgive me if my approach is not a dramatic one. This is 2016 and the common thing people call love IS JUST TEMPORARY. It gets things started, but reality will take it from there. If you get a guy by giving in to his monetary needs - Oh women, life is full of choices. You're right. You are not the only one who make wrong choices. There are many women who were foolish before you. O yeah we'll be foolish for so many reason, but this is not one of them. Women, Life is not about destiny, Life is about choice!! Your precious self deserves the best and if you understand what a creation God made in you, you'll never- ever let anyone make use or take advantage of your compassion or affection. Spend it on the right people and lets do something and put internet love scam out of the women statistics!


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