...maybe you can try this.
Tuesday, November 30, 2010
Actually I don't have to always squeeze my brain for a new post when I could share with you guys the things that creative people have compiled when they have the free time. I'm sure that there are times when they also want look for others' creative pieces to share with others. Okay, 256, You're Not Guilty at all. Thank you. Hehe. Will come up with my original pieces once I'm done with my work. So many great things to write about. *giggles.
Monday, November 29, 2010
(Note: Careful of 256's vulgarity. She said she can be mean sometimes but she claims that it's all for the good cause. *Lols :P)
..then The Sugar Will Meet The Baby Too!
Ouch! Isn’t the word trick obvious?
When you have A SugarDaddy, automatically you are a SugarBaby. Ok, how hard was that?
Do you guys remember the post that I made about The Toxic Lady? I learnt from my bestfriend that she is now settled with “a very good man” who is still legally married to a very sick wife (who is a Cancer patient whose days are numbered). Being realistic about his “manly needs”, he found the lady, who was also into married men (mainly because of their experience in “you know what” and also because a fortune-teller back in Thailand predicted that her soulmate would be a married man) and bingo! They found a match for each other! The lady described her current life as “very good” now that now she has a man who cares for her not only in physical and financial needs, but also sexually. Just that they don’t date openly since the man still has a wife (who is dying) and grown-up kids that most likely won’t approve his dad’s extra-marital affair and of course, to respect the wife who is still suffering. This lady, as you guys already know, is one classy lady. She is a daughter of “somebody” and she earns a good salary herself too. Actually, there is no reason why she still needs extra funds from someone else. Anyway, I always know her as someone who loves to spend lavishly to live her up to her status. Well, maybe that won’t be much of a surprise that she accepts the man…and yup, mostly for the money.
Oh man…when will she stop doing something like this? I know that she’s also like other ladies, who is looking for the best partner to settle down with. The thing is, only ladies who are so brave and aggressive (and immoral?) will go for something like that. Maybe this is just nothing to her because the last man she dated for years (which my friends and I dubbed as “A Total a$$HOL3”), she did anything to steal him away from his wife to the extent of letting herself get pregnant and expected that the man would be responsible and marry her for the sake of the baby but she was wrong. The man asked her to abort the baby because he didn’t want it. So maybe that could explain that anything after that man, is considered acceptable to her. Now we are talking about a rich old man, who offers her money and love, and all she needs to give back is her “companionship” that he could not get from his wife. So what do you think? Yeah, it doesn’t take a genius that she would grab that chance right away! She had gone through heartaches throughout her love journey just to find for the man who would want her more than just her body. Although that didn’t rationalize her actions but I still think that she’s just a weak woman who wants to be loved. She would do ANYTHING to get it. Just that, she didn’t care how many people she would hurt along the way. That sounds not so right, don’t you think so?
Considering her experiences and her options, she knows it’s not easy to find a man who wants have commit his life to her, and at the same time has all the qualities. I was curious too if she found it all in the SugarDaddy, whose age is just “as young” as her own dad. She told my bestfriend that the Sugardaddy looks nothing like his dream man. He’s short, his belly bulging and he wasn’t really “her match” in bed. (Erks…). After everything that I know about her, her commentary on the men she dated sounds like “very common” cos since university years, she had been badmouthing about her men in front of us. I mean, well…I don’t call her Toxic Lady for nothing, okay.
The thing is, she told my bestfriend that she still prefers the last guy (yes, that asshole who f*ck every willing girl that he meets, now you know). She said that although the Sugardaddy makes her feel loved like never before, she still thinks it’s not enough for her needs. She's thinking of sneaking out with the old boyf again. Then here goes the alarm ringing again, “What Now??” Is this not enough of a sin? You want to double-trouble your sin by cheating the Sugardaddy, who is also at the same time cheating his wife, and goes with a man who is also cheating his wife? This is what I call A Web of Infidelities. Someone is cheating his spouse, someone is partner in crime, and because they stop at nothing, 2 guys’ path crossed because they are both having the same woman as their subject of infidelity. Oh man. Do you guys have any virtue or not?
Do have even a Freaking Virtue, I repeat?
I am no angel. I am in no position to advise you what’s wrong what’s right but at least I am sure of one thing. If you do something with a good intention, but using a bad way, the verdict is still “You’re guilty”. You can’t be going after what you want without practicing some virtues that at least spare you a little humanity. You can’t just go killing every good values that your parents and teachers teach you just because you decide that “this is my time and I’ll go ahead no matter what.” If you dare tell your friends that you’re looking for a serious man to marry, the next thing you are telling us , “Oh man I’m f*cking 2 men because only then I feel complete,” WHAT THE HECK!!!
I tell ya if only we all use that kind of approach, everyone else must be dead. By the time you hear the kids making noise and running around outside your office, when you are dealing me headache and stress, of course you feel like shooting them so they can shut up. Yeah, but we don’t do it because we have humanity. Because we have limits to our actions although our evil minds want to do the most cruel thing so that we can get what we want. You guys get that??
One wrong thing, or maybe a few wrong things are enough!! You don’t freaking go and do more and more as if you are so proud of it! I feel so bad inside because this lady, she was my company to go to church every Sunday back in university. We woke up early morning so we didn’t miss the mass. Without her I won’t be going to my first Holy Thursday mass and her knowledge in our religion made me look a total beginner. In fact, she was the one who reminded me to attend Confession at the church and she would tell her date to cancel because “I promised my friend 256 to go to confession together.” Tell me why there isn’t a little piece of your faith that is still left with you to at least to guide your through your every action and decision? At least you show me all the times and efforts you spent for your religion is not totally wasted if you still need to waste it! Oh My!
Yes, we all need that true love. But we don’t go freaking break all the rules cos that doesn’t make you a winner in anything. You gotta have principles to live life. You gotta have rules! If not, I don’t think I want to waste even a second trying to pinpoint one point of different in a human, and in an animal. Think about it.
P/S: Come back “home”. You will need to have “Faith” once again to be able to find that way home. You can’t be blaming God for all the bad lucks when you keep finding the wrong guy who used you. I decided that it isn’t God that make you where you are. It’s YOU.
Monday, November 22, 2010
A few days ago, I hanged out with this guyfriend of mine. We have not talked for months and the last time when we really spent quality time hearing and sharing about our views was a few years ago. So when we finally got to talk, we talk about so many things and we found out that many things have changed with each other’s life.
When I first knew him, he was just a normal officer. Now he is the boss of his department despite being among the youngest. His schedule has changed and the people that he mixed with have also changed. He mingles with the YBs and Datuks most of the time. The hangout places are usually pubs and exclusive nightclubs. Now I understand what he meant the other day when he said he seldom have time to meet “normal people like me” because he mixes with a totally new crowd now. The last time, he used to work at the district far from KK so his social exposure wasn’t that much. Now I learnt that he becomes the opposite. Drinking and having fun at the club is now part of his routine. He used to hang out until morning with GROs around him since that it’s the routine for the YBs but he claimed that he never took the advantage of the GROs because that kind of lifestyle was new to him and he thought that it was a bit too extreme for someone like him, who was raised with traditional lifestyles by ancient parents.
He told me a few incidents when he ALMOST went ahead with it. There was one incident when he almost trapped in it when his friend paid for the “special massage service” and he thought it was really a massage service but found out later that he got himself in a room about to get a sex service from this young China girl. Luckily his mind was quicker when he thought about what kind of disease that this could cause him so he just refused to carry on and left the room.
He agreed with me when I said that he could be getting more and more in the future. He admitted it too that he thought that He Might just go ahead with it in the future if opportunities keep coming in front of him. I reminded him a few things. “If you do it, it’s just a few seconds release but think about what’s gonna “stay” with you. I’m not sure about men, but if I were you, I’m not sure if I could look at the mirror the same way again. What about self respect. What about principle. You talk about some bad and nasty men and guess what, finally you’re just one of them.”
“It’s not hard to be bad. It’s so easy. Just follow your desire and viola, you’re already bad. It’s so easy to say yes to temptations and because it’s easy, almost everyone said yes and how easy it is to be one of them. So no one will wonder How did you do it because you don’t need that freaking brain to be bad. What people would wonder is How did you manage to remain good and righteous after many temptations come to you with all your human natures saying all kind of sweet words for you to just accept things and Be One Of Them. It’s up to you. It’s your life, it’s your body. Maybe you’re worried that this will tarnish your reputation if you become one bad example to your inferiors, or anyone who knows you could catch you in the act and spread the story or maybe you just want to prove to your VIP friends that you’re not like them so that you could be seen as a hero.”
I continued. “Look, I can tell everyone that I’m a good person. I don’t drink. I don’t go clubbing. I don’t mix with strangers. I don’t go out at night and the list goes on. What makes you think they gonna believe me? Maybe they judge me from the way I dress or talk, “Nahhh she must be bluffing”. So my point is, even how hard I try to tell people that I’m this or that, They still won’t just buy it. They don’t care if I’m telling the truth cos doubting is more fun to do. So now, I don’t have believers or alibis that I am really good because they are not there with me all the time to see if I’m exactly like what I claimed to be. SO WHAT? I know who I am. I know what I have done and what I have not done. That’s all I need. I don’t freaking care if NOBODY would agree to say that I’m good cos I DON’T BECOME GOOD FOR THEM or just to get good review of testimony from them. This isn’t about ANYBODY else. It’s about me. It’s a choice of how to live life. I think that to be bad is so easy, why don’t I challenge myself that I could beat the odds? I could be different and if I get to prove it, I don’t need a freaking alibi as long as I know it, from my intention to my action – IT’S A PERSONAL ACHIEVEMENT and the rest is bonus. In your case, at least you keep yourself away from any risk of STD or HIV and I’m sure your future family would thank you for that. So don’t look for the reason in others WHY you should refuse all the temptations because being someone good is not a show-off cos nobody is buying it. Anyway beside you, one person gonna be happy to and that’s God. So what do you say?”
He just nodded and I did not expect him to agree with me because my philosophies are sometimes too old-fashioned to even breathe in this urbanized nation. I don’t care. It’s a personal thing. No one would be there to clap hands for you everyone you get pass a temptation to be bad. My advise is start to value yourself more than others cos what others say or think about you is NOTHING compared to how you respect yourself cos no one knows you better than your own self. So, what I’m saying is that to become good is not just hard, but you also have to make it worthwhile. If to become good needs a lot of sacrifices , then go ahead why don’t make it a revolutionary one :)
Let’s do it :)
Sunday, November 14, 2010
I have written about the same idea long before. I think it goes with the title “The Alternate Life”. The Alternate Life means the life that you could be leading IF you did not take certain decision that you took which finally brought you to where you are now. Yes, if you entertain the thought of WHAT IF you did not take certain decision in your life, What would the outcome be? Well, let’s simplify it once again. Maybe when you have time for this, you can let your mind wander to the Possibilities that could happen should you take a different decision before.
I’m going to tell you a little story that I got from a movie, that tells so much about this concept. There was this lady, who was still single in her 30s. She was working with a magazine, a job that she enjoyed doing. The thing about her current life was that she started to get sick of her routine. She came home alone and did not have time to cook so she just picked anything from the fridge, be it cereal of some stale cake, as long as she eats something. She has no date. She has been trying to look for a good date to at least accompany her to have a good time out, she kept failing. She was sick of her life. She thought that she Did Not have a so-called life to begin with. She even thought of committing suicide. She hated her life.
She saw her other friends, they were married with kids. She began to have that thought in her mind, reminiscing the past when her boyfriend asked her to get married. If Only she agreed to him, maybe she might not be leading a boring life now. She might have kids to attend to, and a husband to wait for by the door. She was wondering so much with a bit of regret. “What if she agreed to marry him?”
She got up one morning, going into her routine, a car almost hit her and she fainted. When she woke up, she saw another lady, who looked exactly like her. The lady was HER. Herself in the alternate life; if she decided to get married to her boyfriend years ago. The lady told her something before she left, “From now on, you are me and this life is yours” then she disappeared. She was shocked finding herself in a house. She saw her wedding picture and family picture with the kids. She heard children screaming around the house. Suddenly the kids were calling her Mommy and started to do all kinds of attitudes that she has to handle. She tried her best to act like she was their mommy. Then here come the husband home from work. She was startled seeing the man. The man that she loved so much and refused to marry. But wait, since that she was in the alternate life, she was now married to him. She felt so good inside to see his face again. For once, she finally found the answer to her question WHAT IF she got married to her ex. She almost agreed that yes, Life was much better if she married him. At least no more loneliness. She has kids although they were nuisance and noisy, and she has a husband who slept beside her. So much different from her version of Reality.
After a few days going through the day as herself in the alternate life, she started to argue with her husband and she sometimes got too irritated by the kids and too much house chores. She almost didn’t have time for herself. She started to miss her other life, yeah maybe she was single and all…but at least she has the freedom and peace. She started to recall all the good things in her single and boring life. She realized that the life she had before does have shortcomings but strange…she was missing that life.
Finally she learnt something from this. Luckily her journey in the alternate life was short when the lady came back to exchange place with her. She didn’t wait too long to get back to her single so-called boring life. She was so thankful that she didn’t have to get stuck in the alternate life forever. She thanked the lady for the experience that she won’t forget.
Life was never be the same again after that. She woke up to a brighter morning, changing her routines and adapted a new spirit. She began to see life differently. She realized how much she appreciated her life after she was given the rare chance to experience her alternate life, which she claimed to be better than her real life, UNTIL she found it out herself. She stopped nagging and started to approach the guy that she liked for a serious relationship instead of just having a one night stand. She finally found the key to happiness.
Yes, there must be something bad about your life now. Then you start blaming yourself for a decision that you took before. To add salt to the injury, you started to feed yourself with the “fairytale” possibility that your alternate life MUST be better than the life you are having now. The answer is, You Are Wrong. Whichever decision you take, there’s always a battle, a pain, a heartache and tears waiting for you, despite laughter and smile. So it doesn’t matter which road you take, it’s still THE BEST road for you because it’s where your feet are. You could not be missing something that you’ve never reach and telling yourself lies that the other road is surely better. The answer is you have to take life as it is ahead of you. What’s behind you WILL NOT shift or change a bit no matter what you do so If you want to continue to grieve for your life now, you may do so. Or maybe you can just turn it totally the opposite. Like my favourite phrase, “You don’t have a choice. You want to mourn over your life or lift it and make it victorious. It’s all up to you.” Don’t worry about the alternate life. The Best is still the one in your hand now. Live That Reality and make it a worthy life that is better than any alternate lives that you could have.
My encounters with people are never wasted. I always learn something new everytime.
When I first knew this guyfriend last year, he was very much in a relationship. Although he showed so much interest to make friends with me, his relationship was looking good. He always mentioned about his girlfriend. One thing I know for sure, he loved his girlfriend so much.
After months, we were still talking like good friends, but not everything was still the same. He told me about his concern. His situation with his girlfriend was not the same anymore. Things were still good until another man came in the picture. This man was just not any man. It was a friend he called a bestfriend. That guy seemed to have something going on with his gf longer than he noticed. Without him knowing, the guy always called his gf and been exchanging text messages more than she did to him; her own boyfriend. He was so disturbed because when he found out about it, the girl kept saying that “It’s nothing, he’s just a friend”. My friend was not happy with the answer. The thought of his gf was actively talking with his own friend behind his back was killing him. They argued about it and then the girl just shut the topic. She kept saying that it was him that she loved.
He asked my opinion too. I tried to back up the girl. I said to him that maybe she was telling the truth. Friends are Friends. Bf always has a special place. Well, that was my points trying not to poison him into thinking that his gf was cheating on him. I guessed that he could not take it. The next time he told me, “WE BROKE UP.” I was like, “Whatt?? Are you out of your mind? You still love this girl!!”
I witnessed it with my own eyes How a guy, who was still very in love with his gf, decided to let the gf go. It was a knock on my head because I thought that people break up because they have ceased to love each other. I was wrong. He told me he was crying. He was so sad. He almost could not live another day knowing that he has let her go but HE HAD TO DO IT. I asked him, WHYY??? He told me that he has reached his limit. He admitted that his ego was too high. HE COULD NOT LIVE WITH SOMEONE WHO WAS NOT SURE ABOUT LOVING HIM. “It’s not fair to me. I deserve something better.” I told him, “But you love her, remember???” He shook his head as a sign that even Love could not save that situation.
Months after the breakup, fate has brought me and his ex together as acquaintances. The girl didn’t know that I know everything. Even after months, the girl was still in pain. She didn’t know that I know her ex. She kept saying to people how much she loved the guy that has hurt him. I wondered, WHY on earth that she refused to settle the problem about the guyfriend when she was so in love with her own bf? WHY did she let things slip away for the silliest reason? WHY?
Can you guys see it? 2 people who are very much in love, still have to let it go despite still being in love. Don’t you think that Getting Hurt is something that they can avoid since that they DID still love each other? For someone who is in the place of the eye-witness in this case, I see it clearly that No one should get hurt. What they need is understanding. What they need is communication. It’s an eyesore to see 2 people, still trying to get over the pain of breaking up, when they are still loving each other, and both are still not seeing someone else. This is crazy. Don’t make your relationship “something” like this. It’s not worth it. It’s painful to see it, let alone to feel it. Avoid Unnecessary Pain.
Let the love LIVE, let it GROW. If you let go, you might not find another one like that. If the love is there, I believe that there’s something that can be done to fix it. Nobody has to cry. Nobody has to endure the pain. Don’t let it happen, guys.DON'T.
Are you one of those guys who have many relationships that didn’t work out just because you ended up marrying another girl who came latter than them? In this modern world where “sexual encounters” between unmarried couples (which is referred as “Adultery” or Zina in Malay) become very normal especially among the “urbanized” people (which include a very big percentage of the population) even in the Islamic country like Malaysia, I think I don’t deserve to get a funny look when I finally write about this issue. One question for you guys… Are you sure you did not leave any of your exes, pregnant with your child? Ouch…Why Laugh? Answer that!
This happened to one of my uncles; my mom’s brother. This uncle of mine used to have a good career when he was younger. He was an early achiever in the siblings compared to the rest of them. This uncle of mine converted his religion to Muslim when he got married to her wife. That time I was still small. According to my mom, my uncle used to have a few girlfriends before he got married. We were not sure about that. It remained in the family gossips for quite a long time actually. Hehe. Well, I won’t be surprised at all. He’s well built, good looking and he used to have a stable job. After he got married, he did something against the law which then caused him his job. He never got to be the same career man again after the incident. Life was hard while raising his 6 kids. His eldest child is now 25. None of his children get to study in university. The highest level was STPM and the only one who lands a job with government. They are still struggling with everyday’s life with moderate income that comes from different jobs that they can get their hands on. That’s pretty much the normal life at the kampong.
Suddenly here comes the Breaking News. A girl, 27 years old girl, a university graduate taking Medic from a local university, has been looking for her dad that she never met her whole life…and that man IS MY UNCLE!! My uncle has been married to my auntie for less than 27 years, this girl is 27 years, that means she is “the result” of his pre-marital sexual encounter with one of the girls that he didn’t marry. OMG can you imagine that? What would you feel if you were in my uncle’s place? Would you feel worried? Terrified? Shocked? Afraid? I was puzzled too. I could not imagine how did my uncle react the first time he learnt about this. Erks.
Imagine this. You had sex with your girlfriend, broke up and never heard from her again. You thought that you guys went on different ways and move on with a clean slate. In my uncle’s scenario, the lady managed to keep it from him for the freaking 27 years without letting my uncle know. Only when the girl is big enough, she has achieved somewhere and the mom is now married with another man; she finally told the truth to the girl about her real dad and the girl did the searching and FOUND him!!
I was a bit concerned that the girl would come and trouble my uncle even more and claim many things from him because he was not there to raise her. I mean, how was that possible when my uncle did not even know her existence? Luckily, it didn't happen that way. The girl came in a friendly manner, just to satisfy her curiosity about her real dad. Guess what? My uncle was soo delighted to know that he actually has a child as smart as her! Since that none of his children pursues degree, now he makes that as a reason to brag. Hahahahaha. It’s funny how different people perceive things but I think that’s would be the best outcome from the “reunion”. Past is past. Take what’s good and leave what’s bad.
Well…how about you, guys? Be careful of your intimate encounters with the girls that you thought gonna be with you for the rest of your lives. Or even if you think you guys are doing it “for fun” on mutual agreement, but you never know if a slice of your pastimes could come back to you in the form of “A Human Being” (Hahahaa) and wait…my uncle’s case is the Lucky case cos the girl comes in peace and my uncle could be the one who get something because if the girl treats him like real dad, he could be getting “a dad benefit” from her and maybe she could help her “other siblings” too. But remember one thing, the worse case scenario is when the child comes to suck your blood and put your life in misery and ruin your relationship with your wife and kids. We don’t know that’s why it’s always good to Be Careful from now on.
Furthermore, premarital sexual activities in this era could not just mean “free gifts” in terms of unwanted pregnancy, but most importantly is the diseases that could turn your life upside down in no time. So Think before you do. The more nasty you are or have been, the MORE possibility of these nasty past times would come back to you many years later. Yeah, that’s in case you can still be Free from any diseases and still be alive to see that happens. *Lols. Want to save yourself from more trouble in the future? BE WISE. Start from NOW.
Note: Don’t tell me I don’t remind you ah… (Hahahahahaha).
Saturday, November 13, 2010
3 days ago, when I was having my dinner at the dining table, my mom was sitting beside me. Suddenly she said something out of nowhere. “Be careful of your female friends.”
I was a bit shocked to hear something like that from my mom. Then turned my head to her with that curious look. I mean, did I hear it right or what? I asked her, “What do you mean, mom?”
“I had a bad dream last nite. I saw you and another girl. The girl was tossing your head in a pail or something and she did it viciously, harsh and desperately wanted to drown you. I tried to save you but I couldn’t.”
Then I went, “What?? Did you see her face?”
My mom said, “Of course no. Usually we can’t see stranger’s face in dreams.”
I looked at my mom and tried to define the expression on her face. She looked upset as if the dream affected her more than I expected. I mean, A Dream? How serious can a dream be?
I dreamt of many bad things like someone close to me got killed or murdered in front of my eyes. Yes I felt bad but just as soon as I woke up from the dreams, I remember sighing in relief and thanked God that it was just a dream and then never brought it up. To me a dream could be something like a tragedy that you saw with your own eyes and then you let that tragedy haunt you. Speaking of the power of mind, whatever that you feed your mind will start to influence your emotion, and then your act and then eventually lead to a consequence resulting from that action. So you know, it’s important what kind of “food” you are feeding your mind and brain. So maybe that’s why I never take bad dreams or nightmares seriously.
Okay…that’s me, but this is my mom! I just can’t take my mom’s word for granted because she was our mother’s instinct could be real. My mom said, “Never accept anything from your friend. Whether it’s drinks or food – just throw them all away. Not like you can’t buy them yourself. Just be extra careful. Someone is trying to see you fall, or to do anything that bring you down. This might caused by jealousy. She’s jealous of you and she might do anything to take revenge.”
My oh My. My mom was sounding so serious. What If my mom was right? It could just be a dream but looking at what happens with the world today, people get jealous of you for No Reason and still do something funny to get to you… and now if you can think of One Reason why they could get jealous of you, Imagine what could be there in their evil mind. Just because I think I won’t do anything like that, it doesn’t mean someone else won’t do it to me.
It’s usually from foods and drinks that how they do “funny thing” with the black magic if they consult a shaman or anyone with the ability to “make that evil intention” to go to you. Whether they will affect your job, your business or just do something bad to your body and health. If you ask me, Yes I know that this thing do exist. But…why would anyone do that to me?
I started to scheme through the list of female friends in my head that have the potential to have “The Motive” to see me fall. Who? Who is she? I have no direct rivals in my work. But who knows, right?
1. Is she the one who asked for my help but I did not help because I was not in the position to help her?
2. Is she the one who made a deal with me and then she didn’t perform according to the deal and I showed to her how irritated I was and refuse to continue the deal?
3. Is she the one who told me that “Anyone would think that you’re some cocky egoistic person if they don’t know you,” – cos that means she was once one of these people who was pissed at me. (Maybe)
4. Is she the one who thought I steal her boyfriend?
5. Is she the one who thought I was not thoughtful enough because I did not lend her the money she needed to secure her shoplot?
6. Is she the one who silently keep grudge because I have shut her from my life because she was the most toxic friend that I have?
7. Is she the one who just plainly jealous at me because I just do my own thing and never at one time show discourages while she is never silent of conflicts here and there?
Who the hell are you??? I have just one word. I only have space for the people I LOVE. Anyone out of that league, I would DISOWN you right away. So I rather NOT know you than to keep you as an enemy so for that…Release all grudge or discomfort that you have for me and just Be Gone from my life. I swear my existence would be too small to even give any effect on you.
Stop all your evil intention towards one another. Life is already too short. Lets spend it on Love and just let go off all hatred and anger. This could be just a dream. Let be just a dream. Don't go make people's nightmare a reality. It's not worth it. Life is too short for that. :)