I saw this woman. She went into my office and asked me whether or not I have any idea about this guy. She mentioned the name. Yes I know the guy. He used to be the guard of the building. He resigned not long before. According to hearsays, the guy resigned because his wife from Philippine came to Sabah to follow him. Along with her, are her 5 kids. The husband went away from hometown way too long. Just as soon as the wife and kids arrived in Sabah, he ran away to Singapore. That was what I heard. This woman must be his wife.
I looked at the woman and thought for a little longer. She has grown quite old, not groomed and nothing fancy to look at. I saw in her, a difficult life trying to survive another day. I saw in her, The Pain that she’s still enduring. I saw in her, the smile that was faked. Any woman would not have a freaking real smile when the man she loves abandons her. She couldn’t hide it from me because I’m been studying people forever. Although I am nowhere to pity her or to feel sorry for her; judging from my own unsettled life and neverending problems and dilemmas, I still think that the only reason I could feel sorry for her was that I was just a little lucky on that moment she walked in and had contacts with me.
I imagine that this same woman, used to be the girl that he wanted to be with all the time. He might do anything he could to win her attention. He might say all the sweetest words so that she would fall for him. Those were the days when she was still young and pretty. Those were the days when life looked like a bed of roses. Those were the days when you thought the world was on your feet when another heart, belongs to the man that caught her eyes, confessed his devotion to spend the rest of his life with her. Yeah. This chronology was a logic one. Every girl who was once lucky, has this in her life’s history too. My mind told me that woman didn’t deserve to walk in like a beggar, asking people “Anybody saw my husband? Cos I haven’t seen him for so long” trying to hide a her raging heart. That is so unfair, man.
How come that someone, who used to be your princess, becomes someone you are scared of and you could not stand a sight of her? Even after she bore your kids who carry your name and dedicating her life to you …Is this all you repay her? Yeah, I’m a reasonable person. He’s just a human being. He likes to see nice and beautiful things and maybe his wife once has it but not anymore. But please look at her again. She might not anymore wearing the beauty that once make your heart skip a beat but PLEASE look at her again. She’s still “that girl” that you married. Even though time takes with it her vanity but that is STILL HER. The soul that she has when she was your favourite girl, it was the same soul in that body. In fact it was THE SOUL that conducts her every thoughts and moves since she was born until she became the girl of your dream, and then the woman on your side, the mother of your kids – I bet all the time when he was away, she became the father as well as the mother for the kids although she was not given so much physical strength to do it. AT LEAST…at least…she deserves to receive that sight of appreciation although it was far from sincere but at least she deserves to be treated like a woman, and we are talking about the queen of your heart.
I was thinking for quite a while. Whose fault when a guy falls for a girl just for all her physical qualities? If you think it was the guy’s fault, I bet the girl is enjoying it too when her beauty is appreciated. It’s not the girl’s fault for trying to look her best and she’s not to be blamed when her looks are the best quality that she has in the guy’s eyes. We can’t go around and tell the girl to not be loved for her beauty when we know it will fade. It’s not her fault, right? It’s still up to the guy to love her for what reason. We can’t blame a guy to love a girl’s beauty. We are made with the trait to appreciate beauty.
Can this be a reason for us ladies to DEMAND that “Men, do not love us for what your eyes can see.” Cos we certainly don’t want to lose our man by the time the beauty fades away. Do you want the guys to love us for nothing more than our face value? What happens when our youth leaves us? What are there left with us when the wrinkles start to get visible, when we start to gain weight after giving birth, when our hair turns grey?
Even if you gonna love us for that, but let it not be the only reason why you love us. Can we still see that awe in your face when you look at us 10, 20 years later. Cos we are like you, another creation of God, should not be treated Less, especially when we have devoted our lives to you. We women, deserve more than that.
It crossed my mind…would I still be appreciated for being chatty, talkative, opinionated, vocal, and what about me being the blogger, and all the things that I wrote and share with people; my qualities – ALL the things that I keep hearing from people who appreciate me. I wonder would my guy still appreciate my qualities that he includes in his answer when I first ask him why he falls for me. Would he start counting all my values from now and if so, it should be quite a mount of values he could rely on when aging takes its toll on me. And would that mean his feeling will not fade? This is more than trying to rely on pastime victory. This is about union between 2 people, the irreplaceable connection that is not based of what the eyes can see. I imagine that when 2 people have gone through thick and thin, they will love each other NOT in body, but in SOUL. After going through half lifetime together, WHY NOT finish it together. Regardless how much our flesh desire want to turn our back on this, if we get our senses right, we will eventually LEARN that THIS IS actually LOVE that people have spent lifetime to define. Only when they have spent that long with someone, they eventually realize that After all the Lust and Infatuation run out, What is left with them that keeps them happily together is this DEFINELESS bond. I bet God calls that Love :)
Love for a reason. For a Very Very Good Reason. Make sure it will still valid when the beauty and youth are gone. God Bless Our Quest for that LOVE.
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