The White Lies Of A Single Mom

I know this lady back then in my workplace. She was renting the office area nearby to start working on her own. She ends up working on his own after quitting from a company she worked for years. She told me was accused of cheating and mishandling money. She quitted her job because she wanted to prove her innocence and keep her dignity. I remember having a special respect for her courage to do something like that just in the name of dignity.

She also told me about “her husband”. I saw that man quite often, helping her to set up her new office. I came to learn that she has 6 kids. They are from age 5 to 17 years old. She has a job and a husband. It won’t be that hard to raise 6 kids, I thought.

And then, who would have guessed that my random customers also know this lady. Some of them are from the same company she used to work at. They told me, “That lady is a crook”. Ahaa…you think I believed? Nope I didn’t. They told me about how the lady was accused of mishandling money by their boss. I told them, “There got to be something wrong.” I backed her up because I have had heart-to-heart talk with the lady about how she was framed. And if she was telling the truth, it was all just misunderstanding. I believed in her. One of them said, “If one person said she cheated, maybe the person could be wrong. But we are not talking about one person. We have a few witnesses.” According to them, it’s more than just money issue, but also moral issue. The lady couldn’t be trusted. Still, I never believed. For me, seeing is believing. I don’t buy rumours that easily.

It was just the beginning. Things started to unveil. Being around my workplace, I can’t run from the gossips that going around. The lady was starting to create troubles – She made large orders but she didn’t pay according to the agreement. Surprisingly, to count the victims that are affected by this to be among the people I know, it’s also a reliable number just enough to shock me. Each of them at least came to me once and told me “they got cheated” by the lady. They haven’t received the payment she promised. Still, it’s hard to believe. It’s so happened that she never created problems with me. If she bought something from me, she paid right away. I never have bad issues with her so far. But everyone else seems to have a trust issue in this lady.

After a while, I saw her kids more often especially during school holidays. When her kids are around, the place would be noisy hearing her screaming at them when they start making nuisance. I can tell that life must be hectic for her for having a few small kids. The man that she claimed to be her husband doesn’t help that much. He always comes just to drop a visit at the office. I learned much latter than that man is NOT even her husband. It was just “a male companion.” The kids called the man as Uncle, and not Dad. Did she have to ask a male friend to pretend to be her husband just to cover up her real status?

I learnt a bit late that this lady keeps a lot of secrets. She lied to me about “her husband”. I never cared about her personal life to begin with, why would she lie to me? People said that the real husband left her. So I understand that she’s a single mother. Is it embarrassing to admit that? She can’t run forever from the fact, right? Knowing that she lied about something like that, she must be lying about other things too. The next person who came to me and complained about her that she haven’t paid a thousand ringgit worth of goods, I told the person this. “Maybe you have to consider that she has 6 KIDS to raise, all by herself.” Then the person dropped his jaw. “What?? Are you sure she’s a single mom with 6 kids?” Yeah. If people knew that she is a single mom who has to raise 6 kids, maybe they would spare her some thoughts if she’s late in making payment. But she has been telling lies about her status. In my opinion, the fact that she’s a single mom has a lot to do with her financial situation.

I understand something. Maybe this lady led into financial problems because it’s tough to live on her own, and having to raise 6 growing kids, alone. She has to think about renting a house, their schooling, their other needs, and then not to mention her own needs. I understand that she has to do whatever it takes to look for income. I heard that she is taking many different jobs that she isn’t that good in. She still takes the opportunities because of the chance to make money. And she works so hard. She comes early to work and then leave when the building is almost empty. She might have breached some agreements of paying in time. She might get complained for being less efficient in carrying on her side-income jobs. She might have a bad reputation of handling money in her former company. Yes, she might even tell a lot of lies to other people to cover up her personal life. Who knows that maybe she’s too embarrassed that her husband left her for other woman. Who knows right? In my position, I can even add up to the list that she’s a big liar. She lied to innocent people like me, who are in no position to evaluate her.

But I took my time and see something beyond this.

This lady works her butt off day and nite just so she can bring something home for her kids. One thing that I can never close my eyes on is that, she is a good mother. How she talked of his children shows that she wants the best for their education. If anybody else in her position, can you tell for sure that you gonna do it better than her?

That’s why I find my way to FORGIVE her for telling lies. I feel quite deep for her that I hope her children will know how far their mother would go just to give them a reasonably good life she could afford to give. She would rather the whole world lose trust on her, call her a crook or a liar, or an unreliable business partner – just to fulfill her number one duty – A MOTHER. Maybe she doesn’t have a choice to do things any better.

All the lies that she told – I call them The White Lies. She lied not for the intention of misleading people. But maybe she’s just protecting her dignity so that others won’t think less of her. Her children better be good to her. I’m a witness that this lady puts nothing above her children.

Maybe one day we could be in that position too. We unintentionally tell people lies that to protect ourselves, just so people don’t think of us any less. Maybe one day we also hope that people don’t necessarily ask for explanation why we have to tell white lies. Maybe one day we also hope that people can just find a way to understand.

Think about it.