To Be The Second Best...

What do you feel when you find out that you’re only the second choice to your lover/spouse now? I mean, if he could pick the best, he would want someone else to be in your place. But since that he couldn’t get the first choice, he settles for the second choice, and that’s you. Ouch!!! What do you say?

Looking at the negative side of this, it’s bad enough to be Anything but the number 1. I remember my cousin, who was raised in the village. The schools in the small villages are usually backward and insufficient in all aspects, including the number of students. If I get number 1 in my class, I could be proud because I have another 40-50 students below me. I remember that when my uncle asked this cousin of mine, “Dapat nombor berapa exam kali ni?” She answered, “Number 2.” But then my uncle would continue, “Yes, you get number 2, but there’s only 2 students in the class. That still means you’re the last.”

(Hahahaahahahahahahahahahaahahahahahahahahahaha)

Okay, that’s just a little joke but it was true story. Taking that as an example, you understand now that it could sound “not so bad” to get Number 2, cos that’s 1st runner man! But if there’s only two persons there, you are actually The Last, and could be “The reject”!! Ouch!! That hurts!!

I remember meeting back one of my ex-boyfs a few years ago, after separating for quite a while. I remember that it was not a really good “goodbye” – he was actually mad at me because he thought I was changed. After we finally get to speak back, we spoke of what happened, and he said he was so hurt and depressed when he lost me without words. He actually BURNT all my pictures and others. *Lols. Then I have the guts to ask, “What? You actually burnt all my pictures?” He said, “I’m sorry. I wasn’t thinking straight. I was deeply hurt.” Okay, I know it wasn’t easy for him and it was my fault. But luckily, he was through that ordeal. Now he’s with a new girl, I’m so happy for him. His new girl has my resemblance actually. Her body, her hair, her smile – like she and I belong to the same category. I couldn’t help but ask him, “Do you pick this girl because she reminds you of me?” Yeah, it was a selfish question to ask because the girl should have her own advantages of winning my ex’s heart. But I was just teasing my ex “to test” him. *Lols. He never answers me. It could be a very sensitive question, right? I said Hi to the new girlfriend and she sounds very smart and nice. I had the evil mind of asking her some questions to find out if my ex treats her as good as he used to treat me? You guys know why I wanted to know? Because whether or not I have anything to gain from this, I still want to know if “I am the number 1” (*Lols). You nastyyy nastyyy 256. Hahahahaahahahaha. Even if I get nothing from all that, it’s still a good feeling to know that I am always number one for him. *giggles. Above all that, that’s just the pleasure to know that I could actually still be his number one even if he’s seeing the number 2 now.

Hey, you guys know what? This is all silly. WHO CARES if you’re number 1 or number 2. Taking my ex as an example, let’s say he still thinks I’m the number one pick for him, but it doesn’t make a freaking difference. He could not make it with me. If he could, we won’t be separated for the weakest reason. He might like the feeling and treasure the memories he has with me, but in reality, the number 2 is the one within his reach. The number 2 is giving him less problems and pressures, and his life is better because he settles with the second best. So which one matters?

But the insecurity for being the second best is that, you feel like you could lose him anytime IF the number one is within his reach. I don’t know what the new girl feels about her boyfriend meeting the first gf back – but in our case, she has the security because she’s closer to him in distance. So if you find yourself in this situation, don’t make things worse. Let them be lah. To hell with being the best or the second best. If it’s not working out, it’s not working out. But I can understand the dilemma of being the second best. Especially when your lover is not over and done with his first choice yet. It would be very difficult to handle it if you take this that seriously. Just because you’re only the second best, don’t make your relationship only the second best to what you could ever make it be.

Anyway, if we have the choice, all of us don’t want to be the second best. But what if we already find ourselves as the second best? Lets do this. Hey, isn’t second is that close to first? Isn’t that sound pretty easy to take over the top place? Yeah, remember you’re second, and not third, fourth or fifth, so you’re actually the BEST to replace the number one so…*Grinz… You know what to do… (*Evil grinz)

Hahahahaahahahahahahahahahahahaha.

Happy Sunday all!!