Stepping On Someone...Anyone?

Since 2 years ago, I put this as my mission. I won’t trouble anyone on my way to my dreams. Tell me I’m greedy. But I just want to claim the victory alone. Yeah, but semua org akan dapat kesenangan. Sia dapat what I want, and dorang pula tidak perlu disusahkan dalam proses itu. I mean, apalah guna membina satu istana di atas peluh orang lain? That’s the point. Sia cabar diri sia sampai ke tahap itu supaya JANGAN sampai orang lain yg susah gara2 sia mau capai impian sia. Kalau nda, teda guna sia pegi sekolah bertahun-tahun. Apa yang sia dapat? At least tunjukkan la yang kau memang sudah jadi orang yang betul2 orang. Ada otak mau pikir.

I still remember about a year ago, ada this office mau buka dekat dengan tempat kerja sia. The guy yang in-charged ni bukan main lagi – lukis pelan renovation, pakai software canggih2 and then bila start talking with me – dia jack2 dia punya boss yang kununnya ambil business bukan alang2. Semua paling kurang pun puluh2 ribu. Ok fine, good for them. Tapi satu kali dia mau call boss dia, dia tanya, “Eh, teda kredit o, buli pinjam telefon kau? Please la, penting ni. Kejap ja” Tekejut sia kejap. Cakap sampai ke negeri China sudah jauhnya, tapi rupanya mau call boss dia pun kena pinjam my phone. But ndapa, maybe dia mau jimat masa. Hehehe. And then, pelan yang canggih2 tu, bawa laptop canggih depan2 sia…Kasi tinguk how itu software boleh buat 3d punya renovation plan. Lepas tu, “Ala, sia mau print ba ni tapi teda printer kami. Boleh kau tulung print?” Benda2 kecil begitu sia tidak patut berkira la ba kan, but sia rasa “geli hati” sebab “something is not right” but I didn’t know what it was. Tidak apa, sia tell myself yang apa salahnya tolong menolong, lagipun dorang gonna be my neighbour juga. And then masa perabot sampai, that office masih renovation, teda tempat simpan tu perabot semua. That guy masuk my place and ukur…”I think macam muat tu perabot semua kami simpan sini sementara.” Sia tinguk ja that guy dengan no emotion. Dengan tiba2 sia rasa dia sudah menamakan diri dia sebagai sia punya rakan kongsi or anyone yang ada hak ke atas tempat kerja sia tu. Sia tidak tau mau ketawa ka, mau maki dia ka, or mau halau dia keluar. (Hahahaahahahahahahahahahahahahaha) I mean, sia betul2 tidak tau how to react sama ni stranger yang sia baru kenal beberapa hari itupun pasal dia yang selalu pegi menyibuk minta macam2. Sia cuma boleh geleng kepala ja tinguk. Dengan umur yang jauh lebih senior dari sia – sia nampak dia macam budak kecil yang belum berapa kenal dunia sebenar. Tapi ndapa. Sia tidak judge dia begitu cepat. I don’t think a guy that senior boleh jadi begitu naïve dan tidak pakai akal. And then, tidak cukup dengan tu, contractor yang buat kerja di ofis dorang tu, tidak ada kerusi. Then, “[256], buli pinjam kerusi extra kau? Kasi ja berapa yang kau ada.” (/me tahan geli hati). Ok, fine, sia kasi jugalah. And then tidak pandai kasi balik. Pun sia tidak complain. Banyak lagi benda lain sia mau buat selain daripada mau jaga itu kerusi. Tidak cukup dengan tu, hari2 mesti datang my place, untuk tengok – “Apa lagi sia buli pinjam dari kau ni ah?”

(HAHHAAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHA)

Bila benda tu sudah keterlaluan, barulah sia terpikir. “This is TOO MUCH!!!!” Masa tu I think I have the right to be angry. Dulu masa tempat keja sia ni masih kosong dan baru mau move in, sepa berani cakap yang sia pernah susahkan dorang? Biarpun barang kecil2 mcm screwdriver or paku – semakin kecil semakin la sia mampu untuk beli sendiri. Even tukul, or whatever yang sia perlu – Jangan harap sia ada masa pegi tanya orang lagi sama ada dorang ada atau tidak tu alat. If you want telefon line, you pegi Telekom and register. If you want fax, buy a fax machine. Does it take a genius? Kita ni bukan di asrama or di sekolah lagi – semua benda u berharap sama orang sebelah katil or sebelah locker you. Cabaran dunia ni terlalu banyak – but kecil2 mcm tu pun u tidak boleh handle, apa lagi u boleh handle?

Ini yang sia rasa lucu dengan sikap segelintir manusia yang mau capai Utopia dengan memijak belakang orang lain. This isn’t about “Oh, kamu ni ambil masa sia ja, sikit2 mau minta tulung” or “Kamu nda buli beli sendiri ka tu benda. Murah ja ba tu” It isn’t about that. This is about ATTITUDE yg suka bergantung dan menyusahkan orang. If orang ada attitude begini, kalau dia buli suruh kamu tuang tu air minum pegi mulut dia, dia akan suruh!!! People like this find pleasure in being dependent dengan orang lain. Dorang tidak mau susah lebih sikit, or tidak mau usaha lebih sikit – kalau ada yang boleh disusahkan dulu, susahkah orang tu dulu, kalau betul2 tidak dapat, barulah TERPAKSA susahkan diri sendiri. Tapi impian mau jadi company yang berprestij. Sepa sangka, even pensel pemadam pun pinjam sebelah ofis. ATTITUDE ini betul2 tidak ngam. Sampaikan sia dekat2 mau teriak that guy, “Alang2 sudah kamu pinjam semua dan buat mcm rumah sendiri, are you sure you don’t want my job ka?” (HAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHA)

Sia cakap ni bukan suka2. Sia pun pernah kena cuci telinga cos sia pun pernah jadi mcm dorang dulu. “[256], u tidak boleh terlalu bergantung. Ini cuma cabaran kecil saja pun u tidak boleh handle? Ada betimbun lagi cabaran di luar sana.” Masa tu sia betul2 tertampar, but still sia tidak paham. NOW I understand sebab sia sudah sahut cabaran tu supaya jangan sampai ada orang yang berani lecture sia begitu lagi. Cukup satu kali malu. Bila u simpan impian mau jadi businessman yang berjaya, u mesti berani invest ba kan? U ada RM10 tapi mau make itu jadi RM1 million ka – dengan – “Alaa, apa2 hal semua buli minta pinjam ba tu sepa2 yang ada”. Doiii…sampai bila juga kamu mau mcm tu? Berpada-pada la ba sikit. Sia tidak kisah kalau ada satu kali u guys take advantage of my kindness, tapi sia kesian sama u guys in the long run kalau u tidak ubah. Cos sia cuma susah sekali saja kerana kamu, tapi kamu akan susah sampailah kamu sedar dan berubah!!

I know, in my situation sekarang, I have friends yang TRYING to use me untuk memudahkan diri sendiri. They do it courteously la juga…tidak mau terlalu ketara. But U THINK I’M STUPID ka? Kalau kawan2 lama sia or my relatives or family members tu lain cerita. We have “blood issues” with them, kita jangan terlalu berkira. But ini orang2 yang baru kenal sikit, sudah pikir “How to use her to get what I want?” Haa, u guys nampak my face smiling sweetly 24 jam u think u can step on me? Sometimes I enjoy it yang people judge us on first impression. Nampak sia ni nice sikit, mulalah naik minyak. Again – if you tidak ubah your approach…you won’t get there. Cos sooner or later people will get so sick and tired of being your stepping stone. It’s obvious that you guys belum nampak reality kehidupan ni. Orang lain teda masa mau rely on orang lain. Kalau buli buat tu bangunan KLCC dengan tangan sendiri, dorang sanggup buat. Cos orang yg ada mission teda masa mau tunggu orang lain untuk provide semua benda untuk kesenangan dorang. Sebab kalau bergantung dengan orang, itu orang terajun paya pun u pun terpaksa ikut sebab terlampau malas dan tidak mau berusaha. Ask yourself, Sampai bila???

"I Am A Friend Of Both You And You Enemy"

Have you ever been the middle person of two rivals? Well, caught between two friends who are enemies to each other, how do you handle it? Will you show your clear support to one party or do you give fair share to both?

In certain situation, I refuse to pick. Because friendship is more important to me. I have had arguments in the past and I tell you, it’s anything but good news. I know what’s inside the heart of the two rivaling parties who never get along. They don’t feel good about it either. You don’t need to add salt to the wound by siding one of them when they are both your friends.

I have some friends who are not likable to many. People even throw at me some kind of funny stares how the heck I could be a friend to people who they dislike so much. But then, you guys look at me and where I stand. Why I could be a friend to these people most of my other friends hate? Why the people that they call “enemies” could stick to me and call me friend ?

Which should I focus here? The bad qualities of my rivaling friends or my good qualities that make both of them to still be in good terms with me? All I can say is, I don’t CARE. If I can find one reason to be your friend, I will go for it and I am NOT a kid anymore that I hear so much what other people gonna say. I even feel something good inside when someone that most people don’t like, is a friend of mine. I focus more on how a peaceful person I can become that YOUR RIVALRY won’t stop me from making friends with your enemies. And by me making friends with your enemies, DOESN’T MAKE ME YOUR ENEMY. I am trying to send a loud message there, don’t you think?

But I can’t deny, in order for this to happen. I need to have very high integrity. I can’t ENJOY the show of them fighting among each other. If I can’t do much to fix it, I might as well, STAY AWAY from it. I won’t advice you guys, Hey, come on. Stop it. U guys jangan quarrel mcm budak2 ba, please? No no. I won’t do that. One rule I should obey, NEVER make things worse for them. If one party wants me to sit there and listen what they dislike about the other party, I will sit and listen. And then when the other party does that, I will do the same. And what’s the rule? Never Leak Anything that turn them into BIGGER ENEMIES because you have to understand these both parties are good people to begin with. They only have big misunderstanding. If you happen to be in between them and you’re putting on A BIGGER SCENE than the parties themselves, I CALL YOU A LOSER. Feel ashamed on yourself. Don’t Do That.

I have also involved in big arguments with my friends at least once in my life, so I won’t be playing angels here. I know what arguments are. I respect both of you and I hope that with your friendship with me, I can be the bridge to make you guys find LESS reason to prolong the arguments. Come to think about it, If your enemy, who is also my friend, IS THAT BAD, How could the person become a friend of mine, when I myself, at the same time, a friend of yours? How evil can someone be when he/she can be a friend to one of your friend. That’s something to ponder upon. :)

WHAT SHOULD YOU DO TO THE PEOPLE YOU HATE?

You have people that you dislike or hate? Okay great. You come to the right place. I go straight to the point. This is how I see it. I don’t really have enemies, but I do have this category of people that I call “THE TOXIC PEOPLE” in my life. They are the people who bring bad energy to you. When you are around them, you don’t feel like being yourself. They bring you bad influences and they always give you the reason to feel down. Identify who the toxic people in your life. At least, you know who they are. What you want to do to them is up to you. But this is what I do…

I GET RID OF THEM. As much as I can. Yes, it’s to the extent that you don’t give your phone number to them. I know it’s not nice, I know it could sound pretty rude but THAT IS THE BEST option there is. I don’t make enemies with them. I don’t argue or raise the hot issues, or even tell them to their face how disgusted I am at them. NO. That’s not my way.

AVOID THEM as much as you can. If you have to deal with them once in a while, you have to be in control of how much emotion you show. Don’t show that irritation because this will create a bad force of energy in the air. It’s not good for YOU. What I do is I limit my conversation with them and at the same time, show some “gap”, a signal that you need a space in between. You don’t sit beside them or when you have no choice but be near them, don’t start any conversation that will touch your personal matters. The way I do it…I usually give these people the signal that I need a gap between us by showing very much different reaction when I am around the people that I like – Suddenly I’m very noisy and friendly, and there’s a lot of whispering and soft talking when talking certain matters – giving them the idea that you’re willing to share private matters with certain people. So, given that the people do have some brains to think and heart to feel…THEY WILL KNOW WHERE THEY STAND. And you don’t have to argue or embarrass yourself by saying the wrong words – They will know how to give you the space you want without much words said. At the same time, your relationship with them will not labeled as ENEMIES neither GOOD FRIENDS.

After all said and done, It’s the concept that you guys should know. IF WE CAN’T MAKE FRIENDS WITH THEM, DON’T MAKE ENEMIES WITH THEM. In other words, IF YOU CAN’T BRING THEM ANYTHING GOOD, DON’T BRING THEM ANYTHING BAD. Remember, we are only humans. We have weaknesses. Don’t blame yourself for having bad feelings to certain people, but then, you keep your humanly virtues in the right place, don’t hurt them just because they don’t know how much irritation they bring to you. This way, we can avoid bad energy from polluting the atmosphere and avoid yourself from making more mortal sins, if you know what I mean.

DON’T WE WANT THIS WORLD TO BE A BETTER PLACE? That’s a little piece that we can do to contribute. Try it. It might work on you too :)