It all happens in only a month. The girl in this story is the same girl in the post “The Sms Affair”. A new friend of mine who is engaged with a guy back in her hometown, went to town and landed a job here. Another guy, who is working doorsteps away from the office where she works, “had something going on” with her, and she gave way to it.
They started with sms-ing day and nite. The short distance doesn’t seem to be “close enough” for them that they even sms-ed at work. The guy did whatever he could to try and get her attention, even with the knowledge that the girl is engaged. I saw it all happened, other than the daily updates that I got from the girl every morning. I saw how their relationship developed. It’s plain to see how she finally fell for the guy, despite her loving fiance who always gets her on the phone checking on her. Her new “friendship” with the new guy was not kept secret from her fiance. But she kept telling her fiance that “we are only friends.”
They went out like every nite. The guy bought her foods everyday, and sent them to her table. It was the attention that she won’t get from the fiance who is still studying in a district miles away from her. With the charm and humour that the guy has, I’m not surprised how she could finally fall for him. It was really obvious why the girl came to the office with the most cheerful face everyday. That’s exactly how a girl would react when she enters the world of wonderLove. She told me how she was fed with words of love everyday. They have actually declared a “girlfriend boyfriend relationship” finally. I didn’t say much to her. She was practically cheating her fiance. I knew it she was doing something wrong. But I didn’t say it. I think that she’s big enough to think for herself. So I just let her.
I heard her talked about her fiance. How much he loves her. How possesive he is. I met her fiance a few times when he came to visit her at the workplace. I saw how her fiance loves her to death. It wasn’t fair for him. It was really an act of infidelity happened before my very eyes. And as the quick relationship with the new guy went on, it went so fast. So so fast. The new guy didn’t wait for so long to reveal his true colours. The girl learnt afterwards that he was “so quick” with his hands. Holding, touching her as if she was nobody’s fiance. She wasn’t comfortable with that too but she said she couldn’t say a word because she didn’t want to hurt him. I knew this relationship was not even built on the right base, but I didn’t say it. They are big enough to make mistakes and learn from it. So...finally, as fate would have it, a bomb exploded.
The girl checked the guy’s handphone and found out a few suspicious sms where he referred the person as “Sayang”, the same word he used to call her. She exploded right away but the guy said “She is only one of my fans”. She didn’t believe it. She called the girl and found out later that the girl was the guy’s special girlfriend. They even planned to get engaged. I even heard how the girl argued with the guy’s fiancee-to-be on the phone. They screamed the hurting words to each other. It was a total mess. My Oh My!
The girl felt so cheated. When she talked to him face to face, he couldn’t explain it. The other girl came much earlier than her and all this while, the guy was also cheating on his own girlfriend... With someone’s else fiancee! Whoaaa... You guys see how it was getting back to my friend who was cheating her fiance for some unworthy guy.
Infatuation on first sight, a honeymoon season on cloud-9, an unveiled dark secret, a few episodes of arguments and cursing – all happened so fast, my friends. Now, after everything is said and done – the real thing has come to the surface. But in the name of love, she learnt to forgive him, especially after the guy’s girlfriend broke up with him. Yes, he cheated her once, but it didn’t change the love she has for him. She could still say to me, “I have really fallen for him. My feeling for my fiance is totally gone.” But after the ordeal, the guy started to change. He didn’t act the same way anymore. He looked at the girl more like “a sister” and knowing that she has totally fallen for him, he was taking advantage of her, like asking her to buy foods or anything for him, and the girl complied because she thought it was a way of expressing her care for him. It went more ridiculous than ever!
And earlier today...the girl came to me and said to me, the guy didn’t even look at him anymore. He didn’t even reply her sms, and he didn’t even ask her out on the last weekend. When she walked by the guy’s workplace, he didn’t even turned his face on her. No more sending foods to her office. No more smiling and exchanging meaningful glares.
As If The One Month Never Happened.
I asked her, “Why does it has to be this fast? Everything happens in only 1 month".
After done some talking with me, she finally realized something. The guy was a loser to begin with. He was one of the playboy type who would do something to get any girl he likes just to get the thrill of chasing her, but when she surrendered herself so easily, it’s that easily too that he let her go. I told her something about “guys and the chasing game” – maybe her biggest mistake is because “she gives her heart too easily”...
From my silence, I actually regret that I don’t tell her...
Guys don’t usually appreciate what they get easily.
It’s really a lesson to learn for the girl.
And she told me, “After everything that happens, I now realize I still love my fiance”.
People make mistakes. But it’s about how you take the lesson and apply it.
And be a better person, hopefully. :)
P/S: One more, don’t wait until life teaches you the worst lesson in return of your infidelity. Be honest and true to your partner :)
4 comments:
sorry to say this dear...but the sentence that she realised that she is 'still in love with my fiancee'? she should have said "I am lucky that I still have my fiancee." =.=
sad to know that there are people who seem not appreciate what they had in their hands now and went after chasing something that wasn't theirs at the beginning - and simply threw it away whenever they wanted it - as if they can simply grab it back when its needed. Your friend is one of the few lucky ones that still gets to hold what she already has in hand.
another of my 2 cents worth of opinion~~~
Manusia akan lebih sedar tentang baik buruk sesuatu perkara apabila 'bukti' sudah ada di depan mata atau secara psikologi/fizikal sudah merasai kesakitan akibat drpd perbuatan sendiri. Lumrah manusia, 'sudah terhantuk,baru terngadah'. Mungkin di dlm situasi kawan u 256, ia lebih kpd begini.. "Ini soal hati dan perasaan ini, TIADA RULES BA! You guys paham?" (dipetik drpd ur old post - Saya Sayang Kamu).
Betul. Soal perasaan susah kita mau explain sebab perasaan ni terlalu fleksibel bah. Hari ni begini, hari esok begitu. Jadi bolehkah kita salahkan si 'perasaan' tu bila perasaan hari ini berbeza dgn perasaan hari esok? Bila keadaan tu berlaku, bolehkah kita judge tu perasaan sebagai 'tidak menghargai' sedangkan kita tau hari ini tidak akan selalu sama dgn hari esok? Dan kita x boleh paksa utk hari2 akan datang utk selalu sama-sama-sama..
Mungkin untuk atasi situasi semacam itu, kita perlu berbalik kepada 'kekuatan hati yg berpegang pada satu ketetapan/janji' (kali la..) serta perlu selalu beringat dan diperingatkan. Ya. Mungkin dgn cara itu, individu akan lebih terikat utk selalu 'setia' dgn yg satu. But like i said, perasaan ini terlalu fleksibel dan abstrak. Kita tidak akan dapat menjangkakan yg kita akan 'serahkan hati' lagi pada org lain sekalipun kita/dia 'sudah ada yg punya'. Apapun,manusia selalu punya pandangan yg berbeza kan...
Ehh..nda sedar suda apa sy taip ni..nda tau betul ka nda term2 yg sy pakai tu.. Lama nda mengomen sini ba..lupa suda skill2 mau membina ayat.. Ahh x pala..buli pakai juga kali tu..malas sy mau taip balik.. Hahahahaha~!!!
Pernah kawan berkata, "hati dan perasaan seseorg itu pasti akan ada yg berubah dalam sesuatu perhubungan yg penuh ranjau dan onak walau pada hakikatnya, mereka tahu yg suatu hari nanti (kalau bernasib baik) hubungan itu akan kembali stabil dan lancar". Kenapa mesti ada perubahan yg melibatkan hati dan perasaan..kenapa sesuatu perhubungan itu perlu dicemari dgn adegan² yg hanya membuang masa dgn jatuh hati dgn org lain walaupun masing² sudah tahu mereka saling ada ikatan, nokhtah dan janji yg perlu ditunaikan? Dalam situasi begini, siapa yg patut disalahkan..???
Sebenarnya banyak faktor yg boleh menjejaskan sesuatu ikatan kasih sayang menjadi pudar atau bertukar arah. Sy fokuskan kepada aspek yg kecil shj tentang hubungan dalam ikatan yg diistilahkan sebagai pertunangan ini. Dalam bertunang kita hendaklah menjaga hati budi masing², sentiasa berbincang untuk menyelesaikan pelbagai masalah dan merancang apa yg sepatutnya dilakukan supaya ikatan pertunangan itu mempunyai keghairahan hidup atau keterujaan yg menjadikan hari² yg berlaku hari ini, esok lusa atau akan datang terasa indah berbunga-bunga. Ini kerana pertunangan itu adalah hanya seinci untuk kejinjang perkahwinan ibarat dari form 5 masuk ke matrix yg dah pasti 85% akan masuk ke U secara automatik. sy peribadi sangat setuju dgn world_thinker yg perlu beringat dan memperingati..Org tua² selalu berkata "nak tym bertunang tu jgn selalu berjumpa, nanti bangas tiada serinya tym kahwin.." Sy cukup TDK SETUJU pendapat sedemikian..mungkin ada pro dan kontranya tetapi jika dipikir secara logik, bagaimana hubungan itu akan lebih mesrah, rapat dan hangat andai jarang bersua atau bertegur sapa..?? hanya mengharapkan sms mahupun call by call lebih² lagi yg tinggal berjauhan yg kadang² seminggu sekali baru call @ sms..sebulan sekali baru jumpa <-- ini yg membuatkan hati itu pandai berubah.
Tetapi semua ini dari diri sendiri lah, sama ada dia serius unt menempuhi hari² pertunangan itu hingga sampai ke alam perkahwinan atau sebaliknya. Kita tak nafikan Memang jodoh itu ditangan Tuhan, kita hanya merancang tapi Dia yg tentukan..kalau dah ditakdirkan putus tunang, kita terimalah dgn baik jangan ada benci..tetapi kalau pertunangan itu putus kerana ulah kita sendiri yg saling buat skandal serta agenda, nah!! ini yg dinamakan cari nahas, buat apa dulu plan mahu bertunang kan. bercinta sampai nak "rak" bertunang lama² last-last kahwin sama org lain..adeh!!! harap dijauhkan dari syaitan hodoh² berlima. Jika kita diperhalusi kes kawan [256] tadi, memang tidak patutlah terjadi seperti yg sedemikian bermain dgn hati dan perasaan serta mudah tertarik dgn personaliti seseorg yg lebih dekat dan mesrah berbanding dgn tunang sendiri..perlu dihindari (Dont try it at home..) Betul lah kawan tu pernah bilang hati ini mudah berubah..Jadi dari diri kita sendiri lah yg menentukan tahap kesetiaan, kasih sayang dalam metafora hubungan pertunangan yg sungguh penuh..penuh..penuh dgn cabaran dan godaan samaada kita mahu yg sy istilahkan masuk "Universiti" hingga tamat dan mendapat ijazah serta penghabisan dari semua itu..mendapat pekerjaan serta hidup yg baik.
Actually, ujian mcm ni cuma kecil ja ba tu compared to benda2 lain lepas kawin, so actually bgs jua ada pengalaman mcm ni, supaya lagi pandai mau hadapi. Mimang mcm2 dugaan ba kan guys. Pandai2 la pikir sendiri tu.
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