Picking The Best Father To Your Future Child?

I quote this from a conversation.

“Why do you want to keep the baby? It’s NOT from good breed, and you know it too. If you want to have a good child, go get a good breed “sperm-donour”, not that a$$shol3!”

Ouch!! As adult as can be, right? You never thought you gonna hear conversation like this until you heard it with your own ears. Since when the ladies argue about, “That b4st4rd you’re dating are not of a good breed to father a kid that you can build your world on. Find a good man to father your child”

Call this anything, my dear friends. The human race has come this far. They are now having the weirdest conversations- that’s what happens when humans are now so knowledgeable. They can calculate the possibility of having a good child – and the factors that are involved. They can even determine the gender of the child. That and so much more, my friends. It’s only a matter of time it’s all gonna come to the surface. How naïve was I all this while. I thought it was so weird, but then I cannot close my eyes and say that it wasn’t true.

This dilemma happens to one of my longtime friends. I only learnt about it yesterday.

The lady has all the physical necessities in life. She has good salary, decent career, luxurious car, personal apartment – you name it. She comes from a respectable rich family. She has it all most of us don’t. But she doesn’t have a lot of friends. So she needs all that love and attention from a man that she could call a lover. On the hunt for the right man, her taste is climbing with age. She doesn’t have a taste on immature men anymore. She’s more attracted to mature men who are mostly married men. So with all the attraction and advantages that she has, she could hook some guys up, but not for long. They left her right after they got what they wanted. None of them wanted to have commitment with her. She had it wrong again. She thought she could use s3x to get love. She’s been wrong about this for many years but still she fails to learn.

The current man that she hooks up with, has been in an on-off relationship with her for at least 3 years. But this man is just another “someone’s husband”, just like all her lovers previously. But it seems to be that this man sticks to her longer than usual. Everyone knows about the affair, including the wife, kids and their relatives. But the man has the worst womanizer reputation – he’s been screwing girls for fun. Even the wife is helpless with this situation. She has to just bear with this as long as the husband still comes home. The lady knows this too. She knows the man is some useless good-for-nothing, but she can’t help it too. He’s the only man she can reach to get a little affection. It’s better than nothing.

After all the years of physical relationship without direction, she finally thought that she wants something “back”. She wants to have a baby. Maybe she thought it’s finally something that really “makes sense” after all the chaos of having many different men who simply come and go. Maybe, she’s tired of hoping for a better man. She thought that she’s stuck with the 4$$hoLE, who could at least fulfill her womanly needs. So she suggested that they legalize their relationship by civil marriage. She rather have the marriage “by name”, just so she can have a father to the child that she’s planning to have; and let the man keep his existing family. The guy never agrees. It’s plain to see that the guy doesn’t love her, he’s only using her and she knows it too. But she keeps finding a way just to make the guy say yes because she thought that her situation is kinda desperate. She has the chance to tie a guy for a commitment, so she gonna grab it. If this guy runs away, she’s not sure when she gonna have another guy.

So, after all the “marriage talk” going on for quite a while, finally the lady has the breaking news. She’s Pregnant with the man’s child. As some friends might guess it, yes, she does it on purpose. She can’t wait for him to say yes. It’s really a last resort to tie up the man with responsibility – hoping that the man would say something positive when he learns that she “accidentally” got pregnant with his child. She tries to talk down the man to get a marriage letter “for the child’s sake” but … the man spells a big NO. He doesn’t want the child. He refuses to have his name on the child. Since that her plan A doesn’t work, she resorts to final plan just so she can keep the baby. She has to let the parents know and if she can keep the baby, with another kampong procedure to legalize the baby, that’s by giving her father’s name behind the child’s name, making the child one of the siblings. But the reputable dad doesn’t allow this – “You are going to ruin my good name.”

So, she finally aborted the baby. She’s very strong not to cry because she’s ready to face all this before she even decided to let the pregnancy happened. So, the few friends who know her situation tried to talk her down, they said,

“Why do you want to keep the baby? It’s NOT from good breed, and you know it too. If you want to have a good child, go get a good breed “sperm-donour”, not that a$$shol3!”

Yes, this is the conversation you found at the top of this post. Not enough with the westernized way of life when a lady could just decide when to get pregnant with a man who is not even her husband, and then to have a “marriage-contract” that they get married just to give the baby a last name and then they can dissolve the marriage afterwards.

Yes, actually, the child is more important to the lady, more than the man. She wants the child for her future. Since that she can’t get a man’s love, at least she wants a child from her own womb to love and care – and maybe to love and care for her in return. That’s what she really wants from all this mess. Something sacred and pure. Yes, she might be desperate in love, but she has a heart too. She is sensible enough to think that this wild life can’t go on forever. So, what now?

Her friends know she only wants a baby. But thinking of the kind of breed the baby comes from, what could she expect? Her friends could be right. It’s all written in science. If you have a father like that, whether or not you’re married, the child still carries the man’s genes. This sounds very cruel, people. But this is more serious than what you think. You can’t ignore the fact. Do you guys know that in the western countries, some homicide criminals got acquitted because the attorney could prove that the criminals’ insensible behaviour was “not intended” but rather “genetically inherited”? So, that implies that, when certain genes are running in your body, you can try to be good, but the genes will do the rest for you. You are NOT in control of your behaviours. So, taking a lesson from this, you can do something about it.

It’s not because you want to be God. Maybe we are given that wisdom so that we can do our part to do something for the benefit of this world. Nobody wants to cry outside the jail for having a criminal child. Nobody. You don’t want to have a son who screws girls’s lives around and potentially be a rapist, if something goes out of hand, right? This is nothing new to many people actually. People have thought about this way beforehand. The parents examine the potential spouse for their child, whether or not the person can provide children that gonna be good and useful. It’s why some parents are so particular about the background of the family. Of course they can only do their little part, the rest still comes from God.

No wonder that they have the “sperm banks” right? This is where the knowledge is really made full-use of. The men are paid for their sperms and the sperms are priced according to nationality, backgrounds and others. So if you want to have a kid with certain criteria, you must be willing to pay the price.(Even Micheal Jackson did something like this too, right?) Ouch!

But is that all? Let’s say, the lady really listen to her friends, and decide to “make it right” this time, so is it ethical to pick a man with good looks and good background just to father the child that she wants to have? Isn’t a child Should be a product of union between two persons who are under the sacred vow of marriage, and share this heavenly affection called Love? Am I at the wrong track, now people? Is this kind of thinking is considered obsolete and ancient?

Anyway, just to conclude this, I always pick the best of both things. I still believe that despite what the technology and science taught us, we MUST NOT let go off our humanly virtues. We can’t mock this love and sacred institution called marriage. We must preserve something that our ancestors taught us so that we will always know where the ground is and be firmly stepped on it, no matter how high and how far we can reach with our modernization. Yes, you can still pick the father to your future child. Then pick the right man to date, and have the proper relationship – use some common laws that You Need Marriage before you can have a child. Let’s not mock our religion just because we think we have money and power, we can be as western as we want. No, it’s more than just that. We MUST have rules to live this life, and the challenge is that to FOLLOW THAT RULES without sacrificing anything good that we want. So, follow the right lane from the very beginning, NOT curse the windy track when you find out that you’re already at the end of it. This is your choice, ladies.

When my bestfriend told me about this story yesterday, I took a long long breath. She was trying to tell me “ Pity her”, but I said this. “I’m tempted to say the same thing but hell, I can’t. If I say that she’s unfortunate, she is far from that. She has everything in her hands to get this right. But she didn’t. All this are consequences from her own decisions. She could dump that man, but she wouldn’t. Why? She quits on hoping for a better man? Why quit? If she limits her options, that’s all she gonna have. Correct her way of seeing things then only something better could follow. This is not BAD luck, trust me. She must get rid of that bad cloud that has been following her. She’s still young to have good things to unfold in her life.”

My bestfriend finally said, “Yes, you’re right. I finally realize that yes this is all coming from her decisions and nothing else. You can’t blame this on fate.”

So people… before you blame it on the fate, I don’t have to remind you again, Fate is something that doesn’t come from your own hands. But if you f*ck a bastard, why did you complain that, oh I got f*cked by that bastard? You are smarter than that.

Note: Yes, I’m quite disturbed when I’m writing this. Let’s blame it on my menses. *Lols