Goodbye Charlie, Mike and Poppy

How long can you stay clingy? I don't know if it's written in my zodiac that I'm a clingy person. I am. Pasal clingy la tu I'm also a hoarder. I keep old stuff. I keep hundreds of letters but I never read them thoroughly. I only schemed and right away typed a reply. That was back then when we didn't have internet. Tidak sampai hati buang tu surat2 until one day my dad said itu surat semua kena makan anai2 and dia terpaksa buang. Because the letters were kept at my room in the other house that we seldom go home to. So maybe you can guess now who are Charlie, Mike & Poppy?

Charlie was delivered to my house in Subang, a gift from a pen pal from Selangor. How sweet! He is this shocked-looking chubby bear. I have him the name Charlie after my white guy pen-pal's name, Charles James. Mike is this teddybear I bought together with my bestie at...err forgot! But each of us bought the same teddy with different colour. I called him Mike after the handsome footballer that I hung out with for a few weeks before going to Selangor. We did contact after a while but I never actually went to any of his matches so we just lost contact after a few months. Poppy is this large puppy doll given by my ex, which is also the most expensive doll I have. I tried to keep them by my side as long as possible. Until I started to diss dusts and germs. I have to keep them inside the black plastic for years. Still didn't have the guts to throw them away. They are still looking new and clean. 

So masuk 2020 ni, finally I'm heartless enuff to pack them and put them away! Whether they will be donated, or given to small cousins and nephews in Papar. You know ka camana only clingy macam sia mau let go benda2 yang once upon a time ada sentimental value. Macam sia masih rasa camana tu benda2 simpan banyak memory yang maybe pernah buat sia happy. But then sampai bila kan? Barang2 kita makin bertambah. Kalau semua kita sayang buang, apa juga guna dia sama kita kan? As if masih live di masa lampau pula. 

I don't like that I'm getting more heartless, but I've lead a distracted life for years before of not wanting to get rid of old stuff. Actually, I'm totally free from the chain of the past. I've done my time. Walaupun bukan senang dengan personality yg begini. But I've done my time!! It's time to be FREE. The same goes with berpuluh2 baju, banyak yg masih muat, tapi I decided to let them go. Biar org lain yg pakai dorang. Sebab these baju2 mengingatkan sia sama diri sia yang lalu. Kalau ya pun kau rasa kau manusia yang camana hebat pun, nda perlu la sampai kau masih pakai baju yg sama untuk mengingatkan diri kau bahawa kau manusia yg hebat itu. Hahahaha. I mean, ini kan lagi manusia yg biasa2 macam sia. Nda payahh la terlalu emo betul dengan kenangan2 silam. Ini bukan kes membazir. Ini adalah kes mau memberi ruang kepada benda2 baru untuk menjadi milik sia. Sekarang sia paham kenapa used items dipanggil PRELOVED. Yes, they have been Loved properly before and it's time for the new owner to love them again. 

So, now that I'm giving away Charlie, Mike and Poppy, be rest assured I'm willing to let go of more stuff from my belongings. Please remember, you have been Preloved by 256 :)