The Art Of Keeping Secret

Secret is sometimes very tricky. It is intended to not be told or to be kept away from certain people who might get affected by it. Something that we seldom discuss when it comes to secret is when it can put us in a dilemma, from someone who has no significance in the secret involved, and then the next thing you can’t sleep because of it. How is that possible?

Secret means that you need to hold the truth from someone, or hide the truth pretending that you know nothing. This can put you in a difficult situation when you feel guilty because of what you know but then you can’t just reveal it, thinking of the consequences. Most of the time, it involves people that you care about. What if by revealing it, you are putting in jeopardy your friendship with another one, but then by keeping it, you think you are betraying yet another friend.

Here’s the art which I spontaneous compile from my understanding. Secret is something to be kept for a while, from certain people, for a reason, whether it’s good or bad. There’s a common virtue that when someone tells you a secret, you must keep it. Especially when the person is someone who means a lot to you. Of course you won’t just take it for granted. Then you find out that the secret is about someone else, and the person should know the secret to know there’s some unnoticed happening is going on in her life, and the longer you keep it, the longer you keep the person in the dark that she has something alarming that she should know. So when you are trapped in this situation, that makes you feel guilty and torn apart…here’s the tips.

Always go back to the INTENTION of doing something. Knowing that if you reveal someone’s secret, you will destroy the person’s trust. And although you think you are just trying to save the other person from getting further in a mess that she doesn’t know she’s in, but you might mess things up even worse from there knowing that you are not the best person to reveal the secret since the secret doesn’t belong to you. Your responsibility is just to be The Ears for someone who trusts you and you should do your role. As for feeling guilty from keeping it, you must understand that keeping a secret for the time being, is the right thing to do. Remember that when you don’t care, you would just go ahead and tell it right away. But because you care for the people involved, you stop yourself. You know that the friendship you have is not worth to destroy. The way to handle it well is always - know your role in the secret. If you just the ears, you don’t deserve to be the one who speak about it. Do what you can to let the person who owns the secret to confront the person who is concerned in the secret, so something can work out from there. I know this sounds a lil confusing, but if you are torn between 2 friends because of a secret, you will understand what I mean. 

As for the guilt, let it go away. You are not the person who should spend sleepless night because of the secret if you know your role and you are doing the best thing in your position. One day when the truth be revealed to the person you keep the secret from, of course she might feel pissed and maybe betrayed, that’s very familiar. But I remember many times being in the person’s position who only learns about a secret after too long, I felt the same way, but then I understand why my friends keep it from me. I would do the same if I were them. So no one has to hurt or get hurt any further anymore than what the truth of what the secret is holding. You shouldn’t make it more complicated from there.

Conclusion is, sometimes to keep secret is necessary. To have secret is also necessary. Knowing that things have proper time to reveal and knowing that secrets don’t last forever. The issue is just the right timing. So ladies and gents, whatever it is, always go back to the intention. To the owner of the secret, if you can find a way to reveal the secret sooner, the better. Don't wait until the truth doesn't count anymore. You don’t know you might save a relationship from a total wreck. That’s the beauty of truth. Congrats to all the people who have been trustworthy and making use of the art of keeping secret well. You might just need people like that to share your own secret one day! hehehe...Good Luck :))

 Picture of the day:

This is my extra phone, an experimental phone because I want to try out some new Malaysian brand phone and see how long it can last. It's such a small investment but I want to see if it's actually worth more than the RM involved. No harm at all. I do this kind of experiment once in a while but so far, it's working well. We shall see...hehehe