Have you ever found someone whose decision wholly depends on
what the mom say? Well, of course you should do that as a kid. You must. But
when you grow up, don’t you think it’s time to at least know which direction
are you going to, what kind of decision to make and what to say Yes and No to?
Would you or would you not agree with me? Or would you answer me, No 256. The
heck with what you think. Unless it’s my mom who said it then I’d agree! LOLS…Ah, Seriously?
I have a friend kept telling me about her boyfriend who is “subject
to his mom” and she feels like her position is so insecure cos anytime The
Queen will give an order and if there’s anything that the mom dislike, she
knows her son will Always Agree to her no matter what. Even if he’s unhappy
with it. Well, a bit unfair for people like me who is not yet a mom myself to
speak of this. I mean, if I were a mom myself, I might understand it in greater
value how noble it is for a child to listen to me. I mean, someone who gave
birth to you, who breastfed you, took good care of you, sent you to school –
should deserve to have that priority right? I know every mom would love to be
the son’s number one. They deserve it, I don’t doubt.
At the same time, I don’t doubt that not all moms expect
that much from their grown up kids. In fact, some really give that much freedom.
They trust their kids with every decisions and they only hope for the best. It
must be difficult to be a mom who is paranoid about her kids to be making
mistakes. I mean, isn’t mistake part of life? I’m lucky that my mom is not that
type. Maybe at some point, she’s trying to have her say but it’s always us who
have the last say. But not all are like me. Some are really really About Mom
and Mom only. Back to my friend. She notices that her boyfriend is such kind
when all his breakups before are because “I don’t think my mom will like her”. And
whatever his concerns about their relationship always involves the mom. He’s
concerned if the gf is putting on weight thinking that his mom might not like
it, or groom less thinking that his mom might not be impressed etc. After
putting up with it for a while, she got sick with it. Like really really sick.
She couldn’t believe that a grown up guy can’t even decide for himself. And
even if his mom’s opinion matters, he should know better what is really right
and wrong for him. It’s not like the mom is beside him 24/7 to know what’s
going on and to really have the right opinion about the people he mingles with,
right? It’s too much when her mom starts deciding who he should date and being
really judgmental about every girl that he’s trying to bring home. It got me
laughing (and it felt so wrong) when she burst her frustration on that, and
said, “As if his mom never makes mistakes. As if his mom is perfect. What, does
the mom think her son is “that damn good” that he must not date any ordinary
girl, and all must be strictly evaluated by the mom before she’s accepted into
the family? Freaking NO. Look at the son. He’s not even rich. Not even close to
being handsome or goodlooking. Not even anything but I decide to look at him
beyond that and accept his shortcomings. Who’s perfect, right? If his mom keeps
butting in, and the next time he brings up any sentence with “My mom thinks
that…” I guess he should forget about looking for a lifemate, and go marry her perfect
mom!” Whoa, I know she was so mad but I
could not stop laughing because she sorta lost her mind for a while. I think
that she’s reached her limit. I understand her pressure. She’s not the first
one who got into a troubled relationship which was caused by the partner’s parents.
So okay guys. I don’t know about you. But if you ask me, I’d
like the idea to have the freedom to
decide for our own life. Yes, we might make the wrong one, but we will learn from
it and that’s what adults do. Taking charge. Be responsible. This won’t degrade
who our parents are. Thank them for all the good lessons, and be a good person.
But then they must trust you to make your own good decision. J
Note: What kind of mom will you become once you become one? Maybe you can start planning. Hahaha.
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