To Know And To Live By His Worth

Sometimes, it takes a tough journey of getting judged and misunderstood, just because you know your worth. 

It took a while for me to see this in a bigger picture. I just take one closest example. My own brother. He used to be very excellent in studies and curriculum too. He was the best student for PMR and then Best Athlete for his school for a few years. As a matter of fact, he used to be seen as The Hero of the family because of his good performance in life. Even as a person, he's so likable, from the school bus driver to his headmaster; everyone liked him. So when he entered uni doing Civil Engineering, life started to throw obstacles to him. Teenagehood is tough for every teenagers. So he got his share of distractions, and didn't manage to do so well for his studies because he did some extra work as a computer technician apprentice and earning good money, when he should be busy doing his revision. Plus, he also involved in the band, which taking jobs to perform around the town. After he graduated, it didn't take long for him to land a job as an engineer. 

So again, no one and nothing is perfect. He seemed to be having trouble and dissatisfaction with his job. He hopped to another better company. A reputable one but to our surprise, it didn't please him too much too to stay longer. He quit the job after 2 years to start his own company doing sub contractor. Well, since when that life is just a smooth and straight journey, right? He made a few big mistakes in his life, things didn't turn out well. He had to stay unemployed for quite some time. This was the time when he faced one of the biggest setbacks in his life. He got married and without a job. That time he was losing one by one of his assets. Our family was in a difficult emotional state just to think about his progression. He became our biggest concerns. We prayed so hard for him and at one time, I was so stuck thinking about how he could go out of his situation. He just refused to take job offers or even apply for jobs. We thought that he had lost his mind for not having the passion to build his life. He was totally stuck and stranded for the reasons we didn't understand. When we told him about some job vacancy, he said, This is the kind of job you ask me to do?" We didn't get it why he rather stay jobless than to just take any of the jobs to fill his free time. My parents were deeply troubled by his attitudes. It took us a while to get consumed in anger and frustration towards his attitudes. He almost even lost his marriage because of it. 

So one day he passed me his resume. He asked me to check it and print it. So when I went through it, I was surprised how I have forgotten that my brother did so well in the past. I forgot how bright he used to be. Suddenly I felt so guilty, cos only then I understand WHY he put a certain standard for himself. He COULD NOT settle for lower than that. Now I realized why he didn't even consider some of our silly suggestions. It was ridiculous for him to take any of the jobs when he could me missing jobs that really need his skills. He believed that opportunities will come anytime. He just got to wait for the right one. 

After a few years of having no official employment, he finally accepted a job with 5 figure salary as a manager for a construction project . It is not an easy job, but that's he's meant to do. After he got the job that he wants, only then the rest of my family understand WHY. Now he had to work till morning, having sunburn because of long hours under the sun - I finally realize that my brother is more than just his failures. His failures don't stop him from Knowing His Worth. It's not necessarily some glamourous job that you sit under the aircond doing nothing. No. He just knows he's that useful he could go around and long hours doing something that worth his hours even if he has to come home smelly from sweat. Sometimes, even if the whole world is against you, only you know yourself the most. I want to thank him for never been shaken by all kinds of bad judgment he got for standing by his decision. If he wasn't as ambitious as he is, I'm sure he'll never get to taste a 5 figure salary cos this kind of jobs are for the people who know they have what it takes to do jobs that not everyone can do. And yes, you have the right to be ambitious and you have the right to go after it. He has his way and kudos for knowing your worth. For all his weaknesses, I can still say "at least, you have this." Imagine all the men who are just plain lazy and depends on the wife to put foods on the table. Failures are not forever.  Know your worth and with the help and mercy from above, He will give us the way to match our determination.  

So guys, this life journey continues. May we have enough strength to face obstacles. Thank you God for this gift of life. Help us to do well in what we do. Amen :)