Being Single Isn’t Bad At All

This is what I told a guyfriend. Kawan lelaki sia sorang ni macam sesak napas kalau teda girlfriend. Dia target mesti mau dapat girlfriend secepat mungkin. I don’t get it. He’s been single for months so maybe he thought it was time to move on. Maybe he was right.

But not this way. He’s forcing things to happen before it’s time. Main pok2 beberapa perempuan and “paksa” diri dia untuk see that girl as a special one. Isn’t that nutz?

So although he didn’t put it into words, but I put his situation just in the right words. He can’t stand being single. Macam saja2 mau cari susah. Sorry to say. What’s wrong with being single? You can’t force something like that. I think that in my friend’s case, he can’t stand being single for long. He wants to have something to share things with. That’s good, but I think if you rush things, the system will go down illegally. Don’t cha think?

Well, eventhough I said that “Being single isn’t bad at all” – is doesn’t imply that you guys use the idea for the rest of your lives. I mean, as long as being single seems to be “the next thing” for ya, then you can surely do away with that. You can use that time to “experience” the beauty of singleness. I tell you, if you know how tiresome it is to be in a relationship that is always very demanding, you’ll know what I’m talking about. If you are the type who gets very involved in your previous relationship, and you did all you can but still not good enough – and eventually breaking up is still the best thing there is, you will know what I’m talking about. Being in a relationship is already like gambling. You put all your investment in it, thinking that it will profit you back, but in the end, you will have to admit that you’re just another homo-sapien who doesn’t know what the future brings. Sometimes you tried so hard that you felt like there’s nothing left for you to try out for. This has to stop. You need a break.

I have totally savoured my singleness. I always love it. It’s the time when I can really find myself back and get back in track. Baru sia sedar how much I have held myself back just to please someone else. It was crazy. I thought that I didn’t even get to breathe properly. I always need to think about something or someone first, above me. I hate it. I hate it that I think that someone else’s heart is more precious than mine. I mean, if this is the cost of being in a relationship, who doesn’t need a break?

This is the time when you know who is the best to deserve that kind of attention, and hopefully, for the last time in your life. You don’t have that much energy to keep working on an unsure relationship just to fail. Yes, gambling is gambling but history should have taught you something by now. You can’t just give in to failures that are not yet happen. If you pick the wrong partner just because you can’t stand being single, that’s crazy. To me, you’re in for a real threat.

So—finally, last nite. The guyfriend sms me in the middle of the nite. “256, now I finally get what you mean. Being single isn’t that bad. You’re right. Thank so much 256. (siap tulis my full name lagi that. *Lols)” I smiled without replying. It’s one of those times when I thought people don’t appreciate what I say, but they actually took it to heart. I felt so blessed when I could make them see life in a happier version.

My point is – singleness is really not the reason to slow down on life. It’s in fact a kickstart of self-finding and wisdom-seeking. I know what I’m talking about. I’ve been there :)