Lidah Buaya Bercabang Tiga

Lidah buaya bercabang tiga – apa tu? Sejenis tumbuhan?

Tettt… Wrong answer!

This statement merujuk kepada sifat bercabang tiga yang dimiliki oleh lidah seorang buaya. Nah, apa macam tu? Boleh imagine ka?

Memang selalunya kalau sia menulis mcm ni, sia memang kegeraman lepas mendengar luahan hati kawan2 sia. Kamurang judge la sendiri ni hal.

Alkisahnya seorang kawan perempuan sia ni, couple with a guy. And then disebabkan jarang2 jumpa, nda lama tu break la. Ini lelaki ni kaki pujuk. Macam2 dia buat to make this friend of mine sambung balik sama dia. So terpujuk la juga hati kawan sia ni. So once in a while kawan sia ni balik kampung dia, sempat la juga jalan2 pegi town dengan that guy.

Tiba2 makcik lelaki tu limpas dorang and cakap, “Eh, bukan kau ka yang baru tunang tu?” Then kawan sia ni tekejut habis. “Aiks, kenapa makcik kau tu cakap macm tu?” The guy said, “Dia salah orang ba tu, abang sia ba yang baru tunang tu.” Temberang punya temberang, akhirnya pecah tembelang. Akhirnya “Ya, mimang sia baru tunang minggu lalu. Tapi ini BUKAN KERELAAN sia. Itu perempuan kenalan baru yang balik2 datang rumah so mama bapa sia suruh tunang sebab nda manis dipandang.” Oleh kerana kemanisan mulut itu lelaki, kawan sia ni pun mendengar mcm patung bernyawa. SHE BELIEVED. Lepas beberapa bulan, masa tu kawan sia sudah balik ke bandar untuk kerja, so she received a call from the guy. “Sia mau kawin sudah minggu ni.”

Terkejut lagi kawan sia ni. “Apa??? Kau cakap kau terpaksa ja tunang sama tu perempuan. Apa sudah jadi ni?”

Lelaki tu cakap, “Ini semua bukan kemahuan sia. Sia terpaksa ja ni. Jangan kau bimbang ok? SIA AKAN KASI CERAI TU BINI SIA TU LEPAS KAMI KAWIN. KAU TUNGGU SIA, OK? KAU LA PEREMPUAN YANG SIA SEBENARNYA SIA SAYANG. KAU TUNGGU SIA KASI CERAI DIA.”

Sia yang mendengar kawan sia bercerita ni pun hampir nda percaya apa yang sia dengar. Sia tidak tau apa mau cakap sudah dengan kawan sia yang sedang bercerita tu. Dalam hati sia bertanya, “KAU WARASKAH?”

Then pada hari persandingan dia tu, dia sempat lagi call kawan sia ni,

“Sia mau bersanding sudah ni. Sia betul2 tertekan. Sia harap itu perempuan adalah kau. Sia harap kau tunggu sia, kita akan sama2 juga ni nanti. Kau tunggu ja sia.”

Kawan sia meneruskan peranannya sebagai Cik Patung Bernyawa. Dia telan BULAT2 itu cakap lelaki. Again, sia nda sabar mau tanya dia, “KAU MASIH WARASKAH?”

Then selepas kawin, dorang masih contact lagi mcm girlfriend boyfriend. Lelaki tu asyik bercakap kata2 cinta yang dia la perempuan yang betul2 dia pernah sayang seumur hidupnya. Kawan sia ni pun automatik bermain cinta dengan lelaki yg berstatus laki orang. Tapi memandangkan itu hubungan jarak jauh guna sms dan call saja, so seolah-olah perkahwinan lelaki tu nda pernah wujud. So what’s the next breaking news?

Itu bini lelaki pregnant. Whoaa…cakap tidak suka, cakap mau kasi cerai, mengandung pula? “Ya, bini sia pregnant sudah. Tapi sia langsung nda cinta sama dia. Kalau sia tidur sama dia, sia imagine sia tidur sama kau. Jangan kau bimbang, sia mau kasi cerai sudah dia tu.” She Believed.

Macam kena gelitik saja sia dengar kawan sia cerita. Betul2 sia nda tahan sudah untuk tanya dia, “KAU PASTIKAH KAU WARAS?”

Menabur janji nda henti, kawan sia ni akhirnya membuktikan yang ya, dia masih WARAS. Akhirnya dia berani untuk cakap. “Dia janji macam2 dengan sia. Sia di sini keseorangan. Dia hari2 ada bini dia kasi kawan. Macam orang bodoh pula sia dengar cakap dia selama ni. Dari dia tunang sampailah bini dia pregnant. Bodohnya sia dengar cakap dia. Last2 sia cakap sama dia, Sorry, sia nda boleh tunggu kau lagi.”

Then sia cakap, “BARU KAU SEDAR?”

Syukur la dia sedar!!!!!

Berapa banyak janji lagi kau mau dengar sebelum kau sedar? Sia punya percaturan simple saja. Itu lelaki kenal dia sebelum dia kawin. Sebelum dia tunang dan kawin pun dia sudah ada hubungan dengan kawan sia. Pilihan berada di tangan dia sejak mula lagi. Tiba2 mau bertunang dengan orang lain pula. Kau berani cakap yang, “Ini bukan kerelaan sia”? A$$hOl3 laa cakap macam tu. BODOH betul. Kau punya tangan kaki kana ikat ka masa tu tunang? Ahaaa, itu masa tunang. Lepas tu nikah, sanding… sepa yang lalui tu semua? Ada tangan kaki dia kena ikat ka masa tu benda berlaku? Ada mulut dia kena jahit atau kena gam? BODOH betul punya cerita. Jangan kau sibuk cakap mau kasi cerai itu bini sedangkan perkahwinan pun belum berlaku masa dia cakap tu. STUPID punya lelaki. Kalau awal2 cakap nda suka, JANGAN KAWIN langsung ba!! PAHAM? Itu pun tidak boleh pikir ka geng? Haiyoooo…cerita2 begini bikin panas telinga sia ba. KEBODOHAN tahap gaban. Then, what now? So teruskan condemn ini lelaki kah?

Oklah!! Be fair. Itu lelaki sudah asshole macam tu. Apa la sia buli buat, kan? Apa la kau buli buat kan? So haruskah kita terus teriak itu bukit? Pandai bergerak ka itu bukit kalau dengan kita teriak? Nahhh… then solution dia mcm ni.

Kau sebagai perempuan yg KENA PANDAI. Sudah dengar cakap2 nda masuk akal mcm tu, jangan jadi Cik Patung Bernyawa yang telan saja apa dia cakap. Guna la ba akal tu sikit. Kalau dia single and kasi kau harapan, LOGIK la ba juga. Ini kes lebih teruk daripada ada scandal dengan laki orang. Sebab ini lelaki sudah ada hubungan dengan kau sebelum dia kawin, then masih lagi pilih untuk kawin dengan orang lain. Pasal apa? Pasal mama bapa dia suruh? Jangan pakai itu alasan lapuk la di zaman ni. Kalau lelaki yg guna alasan kawin “sebab mama bapa sia suruh”, sia nda tau apa lagi yang dia mampu buat untuk hidup dia sebab benda ni pun dia nda mampu buat. Alasan taat atau mau jadi “anak baik” itu semua tidak relevan dalam kes ini sebab itu bukan mau jadi anak TAAT tu, tapi mau jadi SETAN – sebab mau kawin anak orang hanya untuk kasi cerai. BODOHHHH betul!!! Sia sudah tidak mampu untuk melayan cerita kebodohan melampau ni.

Apa yang kawan sia buat tu betul. Tapi sia harap dia sedar dan jangan termakan lagi dengan cakap2 kosong. Apa pun sia tetap respect kawan sia tu sebab dia setakat terima tu cakap2 saja dan tidak buat benda lain yg lagi bodoh dari tu macam bagi kehormatan dia sama assHoLe yg macam tu. Cuma adalah lebih baik dia tidak spend begitu byk masa mau layan omong kosong yang datang dari lidah bercabang teda insuran macam tu.

Guess what? Sekarang sudah almost 2 years tu hal, itu lelaki tidak pun kasi cerai bini dia. Tolong lah sedar kawan2 ku sekalian. Ini salah satu buaya yang lidahnya bercabang tiga. Masih ragu2 lagi?

Yes, sia paham. Kita ni cuma perempuan. Nanti kamurang ungkit pula sia punya post yang bertajuk “Kalau Hati Sudah Suka”, nah mula la kamurang kasi jadi alasan yang kamu tidak mampu menepis tu rasa sayang tu. Yes, MEMANG PUN susah! So dari awal lagi jangan terjebak sama benda2 mcm ni. If things are not meant to be, I guess you have to let it go before it sticks to you and becomes part of your flesh just to find out you have to let it go in the end. Masa tu mimang macam kana kuyak2 ja tu isi kamurang. I Understand, OK??

Ini barang kena bijak sekali saja, pada peringkat yang betul, then semuanya boleh berjalan dengan baik. Less complication. Kalau kena menangis dari awal, nangis la dulu sementara air mata tu belum lagi tukar pegi darah. U get what I mean?? Sakit tu memang sakit, tapi sekarang ni choice kau cuma dua, sama ada kau mau Sakit atau Sangat Sakit. So? Masih lagi ragu2 mana mau pilih? You gonna shock the hell out of me, ladies!

Cerita tu sia baru dengar kemarin. And then, tadi pun ada lagi satu cerita gila. Mcm ni juga dia punya pattern. Another friend ni found out secara “tidak tersengaja” yang kekasih gelap dia ni baru ja tunang KEMARIN!!!! Yes! Sehari sebelum tu baru juga lelaki tu pujuk2 bawa tinguk wayang, tapi kawan sia tu menolak sebab nda ngam timing. Gara2 terserempak dengan adik lelaki tu tadi, sewenang-wenangnya saja dia cakap yang abang dia baru ja tunang kemarin dan mau kawin sudah hujung June ni. Kawan sia ni pun macam kana karen ja dengar tu cerita. Kaku tidak tercakap apa2. Satu hal pun tidak pernah keluar dari mulut tu lelaki yang dia pok mau tunang sama perempuan lain. Sedangkan teman dia bersms dan berseronok tu adalah kawan sia ni. Entah bila pula dia ada masa untuk perempuan yang satu lagi tu yang sekarang sudah jadi tunang dia. Gila punya cerita ni semua. Kalau tidak terserempak dengan adik lelaki tu, confirm la kawan sia ni akan kana tipu entah sampai bila. Kawan sia tu tidak dapat tapuk kesedihan dia. Mata dia terus berair-air. “Kenapa dia mesti bohong sampai mcm ni?” The last time yang dia ingat, lelaki tu berapi-api mau bawa dia kawin, tapi kawan sia ni pun sudah ada kekasih lain. I’ve told you itu lelaki cuma kekasih gelap dia ja. Aduiii, bodoh punya cerita!!! Bila sia nampak dia punya air mata bergenang di mata dia, sia simpati juga. Sia cuma nasihat satu hal ja sama dia. “Sepatutnya dari awal lagi kau jangan biar diri kau terjebak dengan hal ni”. Nama pun kekasih gelap, WHAT DO YOU EXPECT?

Bila sia pikir2…apa2 hal pun semuanya adalah bermula dari diri sendiri. Teda sepa yang paksa kau untuk berada dalam satu hubungan. Kau bukan robot remote control ba, paham? Kita berada dalam satu situasi yang messy adakah berpunca dari satu keputusan yang kita buat. Yes, we make mistake. Sia sendiri pun make mistake juga. Jangan pikir sia punya jalan hidup ni indah belaka. Sia pun ada macam2 dugaan juga. Sia pun kadang2 hilang kewarasan jua mcm kamu. Sia pun boleh berada di tempat kawan2 sia yang dilukai tu. Sia sedar di mana sia berada dan apa risiko sia kalau sia berada dalam satu2 perhubungan tu. But sendiri mau ingat la. Kalau tidak mau terluka dengan lebih teruk, kena berani buat keputusan yang akan make a difference. But buat keputusan berani pun belum confirm yang terbaik untuk kita. Ini semua satu risiko. Mimang ini la kehidupan. Sepa cakap hidup tu senang ba. Tapi yang penting kau tau apa konsep kau. What’s your best priority? Kalau kau nda kisah dilukai balik2, bahh…dipersilakan ba geng!

Jalan ke mana pun, akan ada onak dan duri ba. Dalam konteks relationship yang berdasarkan cakap2 kosong ni, berdasarkan nafsu dan keseronokan sementara – is already a bad sign ba. Kalau kau mau carry on, fine…apa2 hal tanggung sendiri. Jangan jadi COWARD. Berani buat tapi bila terima akibat, mula la membabitkan orang lain. Kalau kau mau pecaya tu lidah bercabang kepunyaan buaya ntah apa2 tu… GO AHEAD. Bagi la diri kau peluang untuk buat kesilapan dan terluka. Fine. But how long? How many times? Tahan ka badan kau tu rasa macam isi kau kena kuyak2 ja? Aiyooo, berapa kali mau cakap wooo…

Sendiri mau ingat la!!! Haiyaaaa

Warning: 256, again, please control your composure and be polite in your own blog. Thank you. (*Lols)

When Winning Makes The Difference...

A fellow online friend Mr Luke Lester a.k.a Nantung requested this picture to be here in my blog. This is a little token of Thanks to him because in the early days of my blog, he actually did quite a lot of promoting for people to start coming here, to at least have some people took a peek at my blog, (including his boss. *Lols). Here’s a little story of this picture.

This is a picture of Appey Rowena Januin, the winner of Unduk Ngadau for Papar district for the year of 2009. She was the first crowned Unduk Ngadau for the whole Sabah (as far as I know) because she was crowned on 1st of May 2009, which was only the opening of Kaamatan month. And the launching for Kaamatan festival for this year was held in Papar and it was the day that she got crowned. I was not even aware of this event because to me, it was still too early to enter into the season and already my district was naming its Unduk Ngadau beauty queen for 2009. I remember saying, Ouch, we have the Papar winner already? Isn’t that too early?

What’s interesting with this picture is, the person who took this picture did not know that this girl gonna win the competition. As a matter of fact, he took the random pics of the other participants too. But maybe because she’s among the most shining participants, so he actually took her picture just at the perfect angle.

What’s more interesting is, he actually brought the pictures to me and asked me to copy all the pictures to my pc since that he borrowed the camera from his friend. So this picture has been in my pc for almost the whole May, and to me, these bunch of pictures, including this one, is only “additional burden” to my pc because I have to keep them around but it has nothing to do with me. Hahahahahaha. But I occasionally open this picture and said to them, “Hey this one girl is cute kan? It’s taken backstage during the Kaamatan launching for Papar district.” Then the person who took the picture told me, “Actually the girl won the title la.” Then I went, “Oh, really? So you mean you actually took the picture of a girl way before she went into stardom?” Okay, with the bla bla bla, I didn’t actually care that much. This face has become so familiar with me because whenever that relative of mine asked for a picture that belongs to the same folder in my pc, I kept coming across this picture.

And finally, when the Kaamatan was coming to its peak, people talked of going to Hongkod Koisaan to see the event, especially the state level Unduk Ngadau. This girl was representing Papar. I didn’t remember if Papar ever wins the major title for all the years that I could recall. So I did not put any hope to see Papar candidate to come to the top. So, only 2 days after the event, the same guy said to me. “Eh, you saw the state level Unduk Ngadau’s picture ka? The girl actually won it la.” Then it struck me a bit. “Oh ya kaa? That girl in the picture you took?” And he said, “Yaa, but she looked a bit montel sudah di final tu.” So he gave me the newspapers and I couldn’t agree more. She looked slightly different during the shots of the crowning. What does the trick? The Make-ups.

Who cares about the make-ups. She’s still the prettiest of them all, right? *giggles. That’s very lucky that the make-ups didn’t spoil anything. I seriously think the make-ups in the first picture was more appealing to her. (Please refer to the picture at the final competition. I don’t have them here) And Yes, I should have my say because the pic has been around me for the whole month ba!!! If she had not win the title, I’m pretty sure that this picture will remain just another picture that could be deleted from my pc anytime. But since that she has won the title, it’s not just another picture of some unknown Unduk Ngadau’s participant. It’s a picture of a newly crowned state level Unduk Ngadau 2009. Yeah, now you know that winning makes the difference. :)

This is the full picture especially for the new fans like Mr. Nantung. *Lols

Kalau Hati Sudah Suka...

Sia mau tulis melayu ni kali. Buli ka that? Hehehehehe :P

You guys sedar kah, di saat hati kita ni sudah suka dengan seseorang, di masa tu la kita ni jadi cenderung kepada membuat pertimbangan yg tidak sepatutnya. Di masa itu la kita akan sanggup menelan saja yang pahit dan entah dari mana datangnya toleransi yang melebihi batas.

Hairan betul soal hati dan perasaan ni kan, guys. Seolah-olah semua kebijaksanaan kita pun boleh diketepikan. Benda yang tidak baik pun kita akan harungi juga tanpa membuat penilaian yang sepatutnya. Entah di mana sudah rasional pikiran kita, entah di mana sudah kewarasan kita. Ya, kita masih ada semua tu, tapi ada sesuatu yang sebenarnya mengawal kita melebihi daripada itu semua. Ini la yg terjadi kalau hati sudah suka. Hairan betul.

Kenapa juga jadi macam ni kan? Sampaikan kita boleh rasa begitu tertekan dengan situasi. Sebab bila kita nampak benda yang kita tidak suka tu dibuat oleh org yang kita sayang, kita MAHU marah. Kita MAHU bagitau dia cukup2 yang benda yang dia buat tu cukup menyakitkan hati. Kita MAHU teriak sama dia bagitau dia yang “You are so despicable!!”. Kita sampai menangis lagi menahan sakit hati. Mungkin kalau sudah tidak tertahan, tangan kita pun mungkin sampai di muka dia. Ya, kita mungkin sanggup tampar orang yang kita sayang tu kalau kemarahan sudah di tahap maksima. Biar dia tau betapa sakitnya hati kita. Lain lagi kalau diluah dengan kata2. “You’re the most useless son of a bitch, you know that?” Whoaa…haru sungguh bunyinya. Or you could even say, “Keep your distance away from me, you understand? Don’t ever call me again. It’s Over between us, you understand???” Yes people, macam2 boleh jadi kalau hati sudah sakit. Tapi KALAU HATI SUDAH SUKA…nda kisah la macamana pun hati kita terluka oleh dia, kita akan cari juga alasan untuk memaafkan dia. Hari ni kau menangis, esok pagi, benda pertama yang kau ingat adalah DIA. Senyuman dia, gelak ketawa dia dan suara dia yang sangat menghiburkan hati kau. Akhirnya, NAMA dia yang kau sebut. Cakap la apa pun. Benci la, meluat la, bosan la… tapi kejadiannya tetap sama. Begini lah kalau hati sudah suka.

Ingat ka berapa kali kau cakap, “Mula daripada hari ini, sia akan lupakan dia.” Benda ni dicakap bukan sekali. Tapi berkali-kali. Bila berlimpas dengan orang tu, buat macam tidak nampak. Debaran pun semakin hilang. Kau sudah hampir pasti kau akan dapat lupakan orang tu. Apa lagi bila ada sudah orang lain yg menunggu untuk mendapat perhatian kau. Kau mula sudah mengalihkan perhatian kau kepada orang lain. Untuk satu masa tertentu, kau hampir pasti yang kau berjaya sudah untuk melupakan dia. Kau rasa kau boleh announce dengan begitu yakinnya yang akhirnya kau dapat juga memadamkan nama orang itu dari hati kau.

Alangkah bagusnya kalau semudah itu, kan?

Tapi bila kau terdengar dari orang lain yang dia pun mengalihkan pandangan pada seseorang yg lain, tiba2 hati kau terasa sangat sakit. Dari mana datangnya kesakitan itu? Kenapa rasanya begitu pedih dan menyiksakan? Fikiran kau jadi nda tentu. Walaupun zahirnya kau bersama dengan orang lain, fikiran kau asyik melayan kecemburuan yang tidak dapat dijelaskan. Kau asyik bertanya dalam hati, “Betul ka dia sudah ada pengganti sia?” Hati kau berkata, “Tidak Mungkin. Saya Tidak Percaya.”

Dalam pada hati kau mempunyai seribu satu macam persoalan, akhirnya kau ternampak dia, dan dia tersenyum ke arah kau. Hanya kau yg tau betapa kau mau balas senyuman itu. Ya, itulah dia wajah orang yang betul2 dekat di hati kau- itulah senyuman yang sebenarnya sangat kau rindui. “Tidak, sia tidak akan senyum balik dengan orang tu,” hati kecil kau mengingatkan kau. Tapi oleh kerana satu daya yang mendorong kau, dan daya itu sangat halus tapi memberi kesan yang cukup besar pada diri kau. Akhirnya bibir kau mengukir senyuman balik kepada dia. Ya, akhirnya kau rasa yang betapa senyuman itulah yang betul2 ikhlas untuk meluahkan semua benda yang kau sudah cuba tahan dan pendam selama itu. Dengan terukirnya senyuman di wajah kamu berdua, tiba2 kejadian yang menyebabkan rasa benci dan sakit hati tu lenyap begitu saja. Tiba2 apa yang berlaku yang menyebabkan pergaduhan dan pertelingkahan tu hilang daripada ingatan. Seolah-olah, tiada apa benda buruk yg pernah berlaku. Kalaupun ada terdetik sedikit ingatan, hati kau tetap bercakap, “Ah biar la tu. Yang lepas tu lepas lah.” Yang penting cuma satu… “DIA” – iaitu orang kau rasa sudah sebati dengan jiwa kau. Detik indah itu lebih penting. Mungkin cuma satu senyuman, tapi senyuman yg cukup untuk menandakan, “Perasaan ini sia tidak akan pendam lagi sendiri.” Dan dengan semudah itu saja, kau kembali berada di dalam genggaman dia. Memang itu yang kau mahu.

Kalau hati sudah suka, ini lah proses yang berlaku pada kita semua. Memang ganjil sekali. Apa lagi pada seorang perempuan, yg perasaannya begitu halus dan sifatnya yang begitu mau menyayangi. Jadi kalau kamu nampak di sekeliling kamu, seorang girlfriend yang lemah lembut ada boyfriend yang dibenci orang kerana sikap yang kasar dan angkuh, seorang isteri yang taat yang mempunyai seorang suami yg liar dan kaki perempuan – kamu mungkin boleh paham KENAPA mereka masih berada di sana. Biar la lebam dan luka di sana sini, mungkin kamu akan hairan KENAPA perempuan itu masih terus bertahan dengan lelaki yg mendera dan membuli dia. Ya, sia sendiri akan tanya soalan itu. Tapi sampailah sia ambil masa untuk fikir apa yang mungkin berada dalam pikiran perempuan itu, barulah sia rasa sia paham. Begitulah KALAU HATI SUDAH SUKA…begitu la jadinya.

Jadi apa yang sia boleh cakap lagi? Adakah sia perlu tulis panjang lebar untuk nasihat semua perempuan2 yang teraniaya untuk tinggalkan saja lelaki yang mereka sayangi sebagai hukuman atas perbuatan dorang yang salah? Sia boleh tulis mcm tu, guys. Sia buli tulis satu lagi perenggan untuk cuba memberikan kesedaran. Tapi, apa gunanya? Bukan dorang bodoh atau tidak waras. Dorang tu sewaras kita juga. Cuma hati dorang sudah didiami oleh perasaan sayang yang sangat abstract. Dorang cuma manusia biasa macam kita. Kuasa perasaan sayang itu terlalu kuat untuk dilawan. Kenapa sia perlu hairan? Kan Love itu adalah sebahagian daripada sebab kewujudan kita di dunia ini? Tidak perlu kita sesali kalau kita berada dalam kekuasaan perasaan yang maha hebat itu.

Sia cuma yakin pada satu perkara. Semua benda mempunyai batas. Ada satu masa, bila batasan itu sudah dilangkaui, kita masih mampu untuk mengutamakan kebijaksanaan dan kewarasan kita. Jangan lupa bahawa kita adalah makhluk kompleks yang bijak. Kita mampu untuk melakukan apa saja yang betul untuk diri kita.

Tapi perasaan sayang itu satu anugerah. Sakit macamanapun, ia tetap memiliki keindahannya yang tersendiri. KALAU HATI SUDAH SUKA…di sini lah kita akan lebih sedar betapa besarnya kuasa cinta itu dalam hidup seorang manusia. Jadi kalau kita berpeluang melalui pengalaman ini, it’s a GIFT. It’s a beauty of Life. Cherish it and wish that what we bring with us to our last day is all the good things LOVE have taught us. :)

“Charming Is Something Like You”

Today, I find out something, very simple but meaningful. I may not plan this. I always follow what I think is “what’s the best to be next”. When I get to know new friends every now and then, I have to accept the fact that I might not get along so well with each of them. It’s the same with them. They might find out that Hey, Twofivesix[256] isn’t that interesting anyway. (Errkksss!! *Lols). So maybe among the friendship that you have with a few people, only one or two are in the shortlist to be someone who you can get along very well. Today, I give one of my guyfriends this compliment.

“Today I realize that not everyone is that charming.”

And he asked me back.

“What do you mean by charming? Can you explain?”

“Charming Is Something Like You.”

And I didn’t know what could his reaction be next because he was in the middle of doing some work.

He might think, Ah, Twofivesix[256] is kidding again.

I have no power to make him believe that I actually mean that compliment.

You might see me as someone who always jokes and flirts around…but I do have the sincere bone inside me. I feel the need to give him the compliment because I really appreciate the few friends who really make me feel that “I don’t really mind not having a lot of friends, as long as the few that I have are like you.”

What is the criteria to be classified as CHARMING guyfriend (by me, yours truly. *giggles)

1.No matter in what situation you are, you can manage to make your friend feel good and lend your ears when she needs it.

2.You know how to make her feel appreciated – and respect her as a female by the way you respond to her, and the words that you say so that you won’t hurt her.

3.You don’t only listen, but you always play your part by giving your point of views in the topic that she starts so that she knows that you appreciate her as much as she appreciates you by trying to speak “her kind of thing” and not always, “my thing, me, me and me.”

4.You know when to make her feel “Yes, I’m indeed his treasured friend” because you would share your moments of happiness, moments of stress, as well as moments of grudges – Yes, you can make her feel that you don’t always have to be the Mr.Nice in front of her, that yes, you can be just the person you are and hoping that she finds the way to cope with it.

I only will list 4 because I will save the rest. The criteria aren’t there from the start. Until I find someone that makes me think the word Charming is best to suit him, then only I can come up with the type of criteria because he sets the standard.

Surprisingly, all this appreciation can come along with the word “friendship”. It’s not always about crush and “have a thing for someone”, it’s just pure friendship in my case. I learn from my life that the more I appreciate people, the better the progression is for me. Because this is what being human being is all about. It’s being part of the community, play your part and find some friends along the way, who really make you feel that Wow, this life is full with wonderful people. And you don’t find them often, actually.

So, should you doubt when I say that you’re charming? I think there’s no way I can make people understand. Like some people can’t make me understand if I were in the place of the “treasured friend” and they are trying to make me understand. I think that something like this is never meant to be perfectly understood by others. It’s only you and you alone who know that you really appreciate some friends for their own qualities. The most I can do is give sincere compliments like that so that my friends know that I do appreciate them.

Ya ba, you’re charming ba. I mean it,

*giggles.

The Childhood Memories: “The Hyper Little Girl With A Slightly Bigger Heart”

Oh come on…don’t give me that look. *Lols. Earlier this afternoon, I was having another chat with my friend that made me dig into my childhood memories. The childhood memories that actually show me that I wasn’t bad after all. Hahahahahahaha. Ok, hear out.

Luckily, because of the chat, I actually remembered a few things that I did when I was in primary school. This gonna be very funny and cute. Are you people ready? Hahahahaha

Believe it or not, when I was just in Primary 1 or 2, I actually gave half of my pocket money to another friend who said to me that her mom never gave her pocket money to school? It was because of a little sharing with me about how hard her life was, I had decided to give half of my pocket money to her EVERYDAY!! I remember that by the time I got down from the school bus, I was looking all over for her so that I could give her some money. It became a routine for me and YES! I still remember it to this day but I could not understand why I was being that nice and generous!!! My goodness!!! And, I never told anybody about that because I didn’t want her to feel embarrassed. I tell you people, I come from a struggling family so money didn’t come easy for me, for sharing it like I have half the asset of the universe. *Lols. I mean, I was not even in the position to help another kid when I myself actually needed that kind of help. (*Lols. Hahahahahahaha) But the “charity” thingy came to end when I found out that she actually had pocket money on her own. I remember that I didn’t feel cheated and I didn’t ask her to explain- I just assumed that she was being true to me at the time she told me that she didn’t have pocket money. I assumed that after a while, her parents actually starting to give her money. *giggles. (I mean, that thought is soooo cute, Twofivesix[256]. AWFULLY cute!! *Lols.)

Another thing. I was a kid who liked to play. I was the hyper kid who loved to run around for no reason. *Lols. You guys remember the Rubberband game (Main getah) *Lols. The game about who could jump over the rubber. It’s not exactly jumping over the rubberbands, if you can get one of your legs to that height (while two of your friends are holding each end), you could actually manage to get both legs over it. So it’s how the game is played. The one who could jump the most height is considered the winner. So this is the game that I played back in primary school. I was considered good in that game actually. *grinz. (*Lols). Okay, because I was so hyper, the recess time was too short for me. I didn’t have time to eat!!! Hahahahahahaha. So whenever my mom or my dad prepared food for me to bring to school, I was worried they would find out that I didn’t have time to eat my food. So what I did was, I actually ASSIGNed one of my friends to EAT my meal!!! Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahaha. I had a friend that time, who would not mind to eat my meal because for her, the recess time is a time to eat, so she thought she should spend the time to eat and by me offering her my meal, she got to eat more and maybe save some money too. And what happen to the hyper kid jumping over the rubberbands?? (*Lols). I was too busy showing off my skills that I didn’t have time to eat. I remember that I became worried when that friend of mine was “feeling full” and she said, “I’ll think about it” when I reminded her about eating my meal. Hahahahahahaahahahahahahahahahahhaahahhaahahahahahahhahaha. My Goodness! This is making me laugh like crazy. Omigawd, isn’t that cute? Duiii giaa…I want to say thanks to my wonderful parents who always tried to prepare new dishes for me to bring to school that time. I think that they don’t have to know that I have been asking my friend to eat the meal. With the kind of obsession that I have towards foods now, I actually miss all the meals that my parents prepared for me that time. Hahahahahahaahahahahahahahahaha. Lurvee my mom, Lurvee my dad. Muahsss. *giggles.

Don’t you see it, guys? Our childhood memories are the pieces of us that we could have forgotten. I might not be generous now, but my childhood told me that I was once a kid with quiet a big heart. It’s just so interesting to see how we see things as a kid, and how we do things according to our innocent little mind. Coming to the ending part of this post, I realize another thing. I was actually so carefree back then. I didn’t think so much like now. I mean, I may have something to be grateful for with this habit of “thinking too much” but it’s because of Not thinking too much back in primary school, made me excel so well in studies that time. But guess what, I’m not gonna feel sorry for being who I am today. And as for being the kid I was… I Lurveeeeeeeeeeeee that tiny hyper kid. Muahsss to the kid I once was.

Hahahahahahahaha.

More to come, maybe. Erkss.

Too Many As? Are The Kids Really Smarter, or What?

Remember the last time when Nor Amalina made it to the headlines after she scored 17 A1 in her SPM? It was like an instant popularity nationwide. Wow, that’s 17 subjects, man! And then, she’s not alone. 16 A1 and 1 A2, and the likes of it. At first, I said to myself, man these kids are getting a lot smarter now. Actually, it’s getting better every year. After Nor Amalina, the next person who scored that much, might not even make it to the headlines anymore. It becomes something normal and common. It’s like, What? 10 A1 is all you get? Oh Come onnn…people are talking about the straight 17 A1s here. Anything less than that doesn’t worth a publicity anymore. Huh? Ouch!!

Then what intrigued me after that, is when this scenario of excessive As was actually starting to get more attention from the “not-so-young- generations, where they had to go through all the difficulties to go to school, getting scolded by the vicious teachers and got canned on every undone homework- not to mention strict parents who have high expectation or maybe, not-so-strict but generous parents who would give you some RM20 for every A. Yeahh…those days when the A is NOT so common. I remember, after the success of Nor Amalina struck the nation, it raised doubts from the older people. “Are the kids really smarter?” I followed one forum that discussed about it and they received many phonecalls. It was very interesting to find out what the public thinks about the scenario of excessive As. Actually, without watching the forum on TV, I would not be that judgmental towards the bright kids. I mean, it’s not so hard to predict when the world is getting more and more exposure to easy learning, high-tech gadgets and even the internet – that can make learning so much easier. With these things around, how could we expect the kids to perform Worse than us?

I remember hearing some extra news about Amalina’s straight As achievement. She even took the language paper, was it French? And a few others minor subjects that most of us might not even know their existence in the SPM subject list. So according to this extra news which I forgot the exact source, the chances of getting A for the subjects that only have very few candidates are very high. It’s like you get the upper hand of adding more As to your result if you are smart enough to pick the unpopular subjects, that have the potential of getting only has 2 to 3 students who are sitting for them. It’s like, you don’t need to be so good in those subject, as long as you know some and the rest know less as shown in the exam paper, you could just get awarded another A. Yeah, it was what they said la.

Then after hearing stories like that, now I understand where all that doubts come from. The older generations think that the kids are getting EASY A, and no wonder their results are very good. And are these kids That Good, anyway? My youngest brother sat for SPM a few years ago and he got quite a number of A1. His English is one of them. Then I remember sneaking to read the essay that he wrote to apply for a scholarship, and the essay was in English. My oh my…he made the silliest mistakes like the word knowledge as knowledges and some other funny mistakes. Yeah, it could be TYPO like I always do here in my blog, but it was handwritten so no excuse for typo. Small mistakes like that is inexcusable for an A1 achiever in English. Then I went, “Ouch, you get A1 for your English and you still write like that?” I told him to correct the mistakes because it would leave a bad impression. Oh come on, you are an A1 achiever in English, so why should we expect less from you? Then I come to realize that, They Could Be True. These kids might NOT be that smart after all. In my days, those A1 achievers must be among those who speak standard English fluently. Flukes seldom happen. Like, the so-so English like Twofivesix[256] has ahh…no way laaa can get A1. (*Lols. Jaat!!!)

The A for the younger kids are not the same A in our days. Is it the mistake of the system or what? At the end of the day, let’s not focus on A alone, shall we? I mean, you guys know my stand already. There is no grade that can really classify how much your knowledge is. And all the grades can do is trying to put a label to your level of – how good can you answer the exam paper- but the grades will remain grades until you make use of that knowledge to perform and deliver in the job market. So if there’s something wrong about this, what can be done? The bad news is, if this thing goes on and on, the A is losing its value. Does it matter anyway? I think it does matter. I believe that back in our days, we won’t allow ourselves to be given A if we are not so good in that subject. I mean, that’s how we honour A grade. It’s a symbol of –you’ve studied so hard so you deserve it- and it’s not – you could still get it if you’re lucky- OH COME ON…

Okay, back to the subject in hand. Anyway, I do think that the kids deserve to be smarter than us. I mean, it’s UNFAIR for US for them to still be like us when they have all the facilities helping them to learn faster and easier. They MUST be smarter, like it or not. And in a way, I actually BELIEVE that they are smarter than us, regardless of the excessive As. Or maybe the excessive As issue is still arguable, but that doesn’t change the fact that they are actually MORE knowledgeable than us when we were their age. They Should.

This little incident at least forced me to believe so. I talked to my little cousin, she was in primary 1 then. She even toyed with me with some Chinese words and made me guess what those words mean in Malay. My goodness. Okay, that’s not the worst part. She has actually learnt how to use computers in that tender age of 7 years old. I mean, hey, I learnt my first computer lesson when I was 17 laa! My goodness. Then she went to show off the English words that she knows, and when she came to the word “Vegetable” – she pronounced it wrongly. Then I corrected her. She said, NO, mine was right.” Omigawd, she’s not only smart, but also defensive! I wonder what would she become when she’s my age. I mean, I am already this smart and scary to some people I know. (Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahaahahhahahahahahahahaha. Kidding guys! Gotcha! :PPP)

So, what’s the verdict? Let them win la. Yes, you kids are smarter. You better be. Imagine what would this world be when we hand it to the less smart generation? This earth needs the younger people to be smarter. So, I don’t actually care if you guys are smarter or not, but you MUST be smarter than us. *big grinz. Hahahahahahaha

(Psttt…ala, we can rest la like that. Let the kids to the work for this world la, ok ka? Hahahahaha. They are smarter, remember? *Lols)

Girl Talk: “The Spot LightS

“This is a bit funny but I have a funny confession to make. Honestly speaking, my spotlights are extraordinarily small. You could not believe it yourself if you know how small mine are. It’s like, they are not even there!!”

I hold my laugh because this conversation sounded a bit too much even between closefriends, not to mention new friends like she and I are.

“Sometimes I feel jealous too when I saw the ladies who have big spotlights, but still, I feel grateful with what I have. At least I won’t have to worry about sagged spotlights, unlike the ladies with bigger ones. I tell ya, these spotlights of mine won’t even get to sag cos they are just soooo small!!”

Then I giggled and said, “Oh okay, it’s good that you find the way to like what you have.”

Then suddenly 2 girls passed by. This lady friend did it again.

“Look at the other girl with the smaller frame. How come she’s so skinny yet look at her spotlights. They are much bigger than mine. Her body looks a bit ridiculous with that kind of spotlight size. But the guys might think that’s sexy”

Then I looked at the lady she mentioned. I think she was looking great with such a small frame and height, and still look curvy. The dressing made the bust came visible. It’s just a normal view to me. But this lady friend of mine with such a funny character, was using her creativity to see things a bit more interesting. She could go on and on commenting about the body parts spontaneously. That’s too big, that’s too small. Whoaa!! This lady must have been spending a lot of time looking at other ladies’ body contour. *Lols.

Then she spoke about another friend of ours. She’s much skinner than her, but according to her, “Yes, she’s so skinny but even her spotlights are much bigger than mine.”

She complained and complained about how big others spotlights are, and always ended it with

“Still I feel so grateful with this small spotlights I’m blessed with.”

(Luckily, she never actually tried to get closer to me or anywhere nearer my spotlights directly in this conversation. Hahahahahahaahhahahaha)

Then she mumbled and mumbled like neverending. She this, she that. Her spotlights this, her spotlights that. I was amazed that someone could sound so obsessed with Spotlights. *Lols.

Then I remember she finally said this, “Why her badan is so kecil and then her spotlights are big? It shouldn’t be so, right? And look at me??? My badan is so besar and then my spotlights are SMALL!!! BUDUHHH BETULLLLLLLLL!!!

(Hahahaahahahahahahahahahhahaahahahahahahahahhaa) It was when I burst laughing like there’s tomorrow. She finally said it!!! She was trying to hide how upset she was with her spotlight size and she wasted my time listening to “I’m grateful for what I have” when her mind was saying otherwise. I knew it and I was just waiting for the time that she would admit that. And it all came out like so fast and it suddenly went out. It’s like, “Ooppss…I did not just say that.”

It was tickling me to the bones. She blushed when she realized that I was listening to every words that came out from her mouth, yeahh, eventhough I have better things to discuss about other than trying to make myself feel good about my Own spotlights by condemning others’ spotlights.

Last2, I said this to her, “Be thankful that you even have one ba!! Doiiii dogooo!”

Yes people, it can get as ridiculous as that as we ladies go about comparing the Womanly Asset. The spotlights always become the victim of talkabouts because they make woman’s body so special and unique. It’s the spotlights that contribute most to the curvy look of a woman’s body. Yeah, other than the hips. But wait, before that friend of mine enters another session of “The Hips Forum” I should warn her, “Okay Okay, I get it. Your hips are Not all that but you still love them, don’t you?” Hahahahahahaha

Ladies, I think we better mean it. I think it’s the best thing to do. We appreciate what we have. Bigger or smaller, if they don’t make you too happy, at least you can do something to improve the appearance. I understand how much pressure to see other ladies who are so blessed with well-built body and we have to work hard to even superficially look as good. To me, being a woman and to have those feminine elements is already something to be grateful for. Because I know I may not be that lucky compared to those who are luckier, but I saw a lot of ladies out there who just “Forget It” because they just quit trying to fix their imperfections. I think this topic will not go anywhere because there will always be personal insecurities and dissatisfaction about our own defects so let’s just be rational about this whole idea.

Let’s not focus on what we don’t have, but focus and tap on What We Have.

As far as our Spotlights are concerned, to have them HEALTHY is already a blessing so let’s not lose touch of what’s more important, ok ladies? :)

We are all special in our own way and the Spotlight size is no way close to define “that speciality” in the most accurate meaning.

Wow, isn’t it wonderful to be a woman?

*giggles.

Too Cheap To Wear?

I bought 2 new blouses to wear at a coming event. One blouse is at a standard price and the other is actually much cheaper than it looked. When my sister asked me to show them, I was a bit reluctant to show the other one with the cheaper price, though it is much more beautiful. “So this is what you gonna wear?”

“Actually, yes. But I’m having a second thought on the second blouse. Because it’s quite cheap.”

Damn it’s strange. How on earth did I say anything like that? I mean, “because it’s cheap”??? Gotta be kidding me.

Then I continued, “Actually, I would still buy it if it costs more than that. It’s just beautiful and it fits me just nice. The thing is, it cost only that much so I just grabbed it and brought it to the counter without much thinking. Even if I don’t wear this to the event, I would still not mind buying it. But then, since that I need something to wear for a big event, I’m a bit hesitant because of the low price. Something doesn’t feel right.”

My dear readers, why the fuss, right? I mean, why would I think to a great length just because a blouse is so beautiful but yet so cheap? Why did I make such a big fuss out of this? Why don’t I just wear it and, to hell with the cheap price. So what?

The hunt for the perfect clothes is pretty hard. If you can find one that cost so much, you would still buy it because you know, it’s not easy to come across another perfect one. Price becomes number two because you Want it and you Need it. If Only you could find a perfect blouse with a “perfect” price tag, isn’t that a dream come true? Yes, it is.

But now here’s another issue that shouldn’t be an issue to begin with. How strange. Now that I found something so good and yet so cheap, I become a bit hesitant to wear it at a big event. Yes, although it’s beautiful. Nobody would have guessed how much it cost but since I bought it myself, so I know how much it cost. And how could that possibly disturb my emotion to wear it?

This is something strange about human beings.

No Wonder why the smart business players can make a lot of Easy Money because they can simply manipulate the “weakness” in human beings. The power of making Impression is not just what to be made public, but in senses too. People are made to believe that What Expensive is worth it, and vice versa. So even if it has to come down to them wearing something so nice but doesn’t cost so much, they still don’t feel so good inside because they know that they don’t have to fork out so much money to finally be able to buy it.

What if… what if another shop sell the same blouse, priced 5 times the price that I bought it, yes, I would still buy it if I come to that shop first. And the feeling would be different then. I would believe that the blouse worth that much because I spent so much money on it. But in reality, since that I come to the shop that sells it at such a low price first, I know that the blouse doesn’t worth so much in terms of production cost. But what does that do to me?

Look at me now, I don’t feel that good to own the blouse just because it doesn’t cost me so much.

The other shop that sell it 5 times more expensive doesn’t change the fact that the real cost of production for the blouse is SO LOW. Just with a touch of golden colour all around it, could make a whole different IMPRESSION on it. It can look expensive and all, but only the manufacturer knows how small the cost is to produce a blouse like that. Only because of this, the shop I bought it from sell it that cheap.

I think I’m just lucky to find something that cost “as real” as can be. You never know how many Cheap clothes out there that are sold in exclusive boutiques. Those that cost you 3 digits to buy, it doesn’t mean that it’s really expensive to produce. You never know that ¾ of the price actually added to BUY your impression so that you can feel good to buy it. The smart sellers who can see this weakness can simply be manipulative and make easy money. As a matter of facts, there are many shops our there who saw the opportunity in manipulating this element. I can’t blame them. This is what business world is all about.

I think that they are being so smart way before I even come to realize it. The manufacturers don’t earn so much because people don’t have to know where the factory is, but it’s the middlemen that are earning so much money. They can play with impressions ( such as brands and labels), charge it so high and make the rich people smile when they buy it.

They don’t have to know how cheap the cost of production is. They only want to have a reason to spend their money and BELIEVE that there are buying something that really worth that much.

I think, let’s not care so much about this. Let’s just live with it and mind you, with this weaknesses, who knows one day, it might be our turn to tap benefits from it. *giggles.

Back to my blouse, I will still wear it. My little sacrifice is to forget that I don’t spend so much on it. How about a little game that I tell people I actually bought it a much higher price?

They don’t have to know how much it cost me. I only need to make them BELIEVE that it cost so much to make them think high of the blouse. Hahahahahahaha. That’s a little manipulative mind game. Don’t blame me. The game is around for so long already. I’m just taking a little part.

So, will I buy a beautiful blouse at a cheap price again? I REALLY DON’T MIND. Bring it to me!! *Lols

Hahahahahahahahahahaha.

Why My Blog Is That Important To Me?

Hiya peeps...it's surprising that I can sit here just browse around and "mess" with my page coding to finally come up with a newer template that can leave me satisfied, at least for now.

This is actually the actual type of template that I would love my blog to have. I'm working on a new graphics for my blog so it will be up Very Soon. As you can see, there is a lot of lovely templates out there and I'm tempted to just pick one and save my time but this stubborn pokemon insists to have some personalized theme that I create myself. This stubborness is killing me sometimes. *Sighs.

Anyway, it's 31st of May already and it means it's time to change into a newer theme and say goodbye to my Unduk Ngadau theme for Kaamatan. Suddenly, it comes to me that I'm doing SO MUCH for my blog. I mean, I feel the need to write something everyday (though sometimes I fail to do so), and then I care so much about how my blog would appear to people (though most people come to my blog by accident *giggles) but I think I have the answer ready.

If you ask for my Friendster or Facebook, I don't have them. I'm not kidding. I don't have the time to do all those things because I think that it needs a lot of time to maintain them.

My Blog Is All I Have here :)

That's why my blog is very important to me. Thanks for dropping by ah.

Muahsss all

I said, Loyalty. She said, Trust.

I asked this question during a casual hangouts with my closefriends. I posed this very simple question to them.

“What is the most important thing in a relationship?”

Each of them said something. But I didn’t remember what they said because I think they didn’t get my question right. But one of them, which is the best closefriend of mine, said this.

“It’s Trust.”

Then I said this, “You think it’s Trust? To me it’s Faithfulness.”

Then my friend tried to defend her opinion.

“Without trust, it’s not going to work out.”

Then I answered,”

“True, but without loyalty, there isn’t a relationship to practice the trust for. Before you can talk about other things such as trust, understanding, caring and so on, both of you must first be there in the relationship to make those other things relevant to practice. If let’s say you can Trust so much, but the partner is not “an active player” in the relationship, it doesn’t matter how much trust you are willing to give. Trust doesn’t correct “his infidelity” when infidelity is all you need to end “your loving years” with him. Let’s say, if you don’t have trust for each other, but you guys are loyal, trust me, you guys will work it out if both of you still WANT the relationship. That’s very important to me. If you speak of Trust, you are being unfair to other elements as important trust, like understanding, acceptance, coping - because you need all of that to make a relationship work. But before that, the most essential thing is to have a relevant relationship to work for, and then the other questions will come into the picture.”

Agree or not? But I come up with that answer after spending so much time trying to figure it out. I could have a relationship that is as shaky as can be when my partner doesn’t trust me. But then I can do what I can to tell him that he’s wrong about certain things. I can steal his heart back if he gets hurt by my action. If he gets too jealous, I can always do it my way to tell him that it’s him that I love so much. Bottomline is, he and I want the relationship so badly that we would do whatever to make sure that it lasts. So he and I might do something that hurt each other, but if we are still hanging on to the same thing that, “we both want this relationship to work” so anything else can be taken care of from there. But you can really cut the story short if one of you has no heart for the relationship anymore. Even the smallest thing can be the reason to part ways. So I describe this as “Loyalty” – if you can be loyal to each other, it’s that long that you can have the relationship alive. Trust? Jealousy? Misunderstanding? These are part of the emotional roller coaster that WILL HAPPEN once in a while. I think as much as you don’t want them, they will still occur to you occasionally. But it’s not how much the tests, but how you can manage to survive them right?

I can say this for sure because even how bad the problem that comes to me and my partner, we could still have our relationship despite whatever that is trying to separate us. But it’s when one of us choose to not be loyal (in this sense, not loyal means “stop working for a relationship” for whatever reason there is), we don’t even need an excuse to do it. We can just walk away without any apparent reason. So my conclusion is, of both of us a loyal to each other, we can handle it all.

At least, I believe so :)

Again, it’s more on the hands-on and not just neverending theory on paper right? If you can tackle it using “what’s best in hand”, you don’t need a damn hypothesis because actions speak louder than words :)