Sindrom Frust

Kamu pernah kah alami satu situasi where suddenly kamu FRUST dengan something. It could be persekitaran, orang lain or maybe diri kamu sendiri. Nothing major happened but you just feel disappointed sikit. Why I said "sikit" sebab there's really nothing big happened to cause that disappointment. As if kau kutip sikit dari sana sini, and suddenly dia jadi "something" yang takes over you. I just gave it a name. I call it Sindrom Frust.

This is actually something new to my attention sebab biasanya kalau sia sad or feel bad about something, mesti adalah something yg telah terjadi yang clearly penyebab benda tu. Usually it started from orang lain. But Sindrom Frust ni seolah-olah start dari diri sia sendiri. I can't name one person who caused this. Sia punya frustration datang dari diri sia sendiri. If you recall my FB post 2 days ago, pasal sia bikin banyak kesilapan yang buat sia rasa malu tinguk cermin. Hahahaha. Actually it's true.  Kesilapan yang sia bikin tu adalah dalam kerja yang sia bikin. Sebab sia malas mau refer dan terus main redah ja. Akhirnya kesilapan tu bikin org lain unhappy and menyebabkan kerugian juga sebab ada item yang maybe sia kena bikin balik. Sepatutnya bukan level sia lagi bikin silap gitu sebab sepatutnya sia makin careful and benda2 yang sia bikin adalah sepatutnya lebih baik. Dan bukan sebaliknya. If you ask me why suddenly datang kemalasan untuk ikut protokol, sebab sia rasa too used to it, and tiba2 sia malas mau jadi macam budak baru belajar yang semua benda kena refer dulu untuk confirmation. Orang pun hairan why suddenly sia buat gitu sebab sebelum ni they know how careful I was.

Actually I felt this way since yesterday, and I tried not to show it. Sia masih kerja dan berkomunikasi biasa, but the fact is, I did it all only half-hearted. I already started to have that sindrom inside me. I know it's not me.. Sia adalah si 256 yang enthusiastic and sometimes ada energy yang terlebih-lebih kalau sia mau bikin something tu, to the point yang sia rasa head sia buli explode if anything goes wrong. Tapi baru2 tu boleh pula sia selamba ja buat mistake. Akhirnya the only person to blame is myself. 

Maybe I'm just to used to my routine. Maybe I need a break. I need new air. I need something new to get inspired by. What do you expect from a human being? Maybe ini lah antara limitation manusia yang we need to learn. Walaupun sekarang ni sia sedang alami benda tu, it doesn't mean I can't analyse it secara rational. I mean we heard stories how people got beaten up by their emotion to the point that they have Anxiety Disorder and then Depression. Whoa. It's no joke. People died from depression. I think they couldn't handle it when something peculiar like this shows up. Sometimes it's too overwhelming. Sia selalu baca orang tulis, but ada benda2 yang sia susah mau faham. It's like, Aik, macam tu pun buli rasa mau bunuh diri? We seriously don't understand what's going on. Sindrom Frust macam sekarang ni pun sudah boleh dikatakan sandi. Kalau last week sia nda sabar2 mau pi kerja. Now it's the opposite. I can still feel all the excitement at work but I want it to wait first. I need to get over this stupid sindrom. But I need to study this first so I know how to avoid it. Buli avoid ka ni?

Maybe betul lahhh, Your biggest enemy is YOURSELF. Kau fikir kau miliki diri kau, kau fikir diri kau adalah kau, so you don't recognize when the battle comes from within. Kekacauan yang berlaku dalam kepala kau adalah totally domestic issue. Kau mesti tau tangani benda2 domestic ni sebab kepala tu pun kau punya juga. Memang teda org lain yg lebih tau. Thats why sia percaya kalau org cakap kenapa travelling tu bagus sebab dia TUNE BALIK benda2 gila yang tersasar dari kepala kau. Bila kau sedar dunia di luar tu luas, experience benda baru and persekitaran baru. It can also makes you miss your life, makes you realize more of your blessings, and nda pasal2 ada satu semangat baru. So jangan heran why recreational places adalah tumpuan ramai. Everytime lepas jalan2, mesti ada komen, Macam sia lebih bersemangat oh lepas balik dari jalan2. So guys, apa yg I can say right now is, kalau kamurang terkena ni Sindrom Frust, it's okay to slow down a bit. Give yourself time untuk relax, rehat cukup2. Bikin la aktiviti yang slow and easy. No need to tekankan kepala kamurang yg sometimes tinggi permintaan dia (sia cakap pasal diri sendiri kali ni...hehe). Dan percaya la, hari2 yang lebih baik is waiting for us. Kau kena prepare seja untuk menjadi lebih bahagia. Prepare to be more lucky. Kalau kepala kau stuck, kau baca la benda2 yang buli kasi un-stuck kepala kau. Watch romance movies ka, watch comedy ka, baca memes ka, sebab sia percaya HAPPY POINTS berada di sekitar kita. Kau kasi ignore dorang, kau yg rugi one happy moment. So guys, kalau la kamu alami Sindrom Frust ni, you know you are not alone. I'm trying to overcome this too. Kasi chance dia satu hari seja la ok? Limpas malam ni kita baibai sudah sama dia. Nasib baik esok cuti Malaysia Day. We should have enough time to go back to work penuh dengan aura positif ready untuk menjangkitkan orang lain dengan aura tu...Hehehe. So guys, lets do this ok?