Behind Her Perfect Life

I always talked about this one friend of mine, whom I consider has everything in her life. From career to family, she achieves what the best we can imagine. Although the road was not clear and easy in the beginning, but then she was bold enough to go thru the tough stage in her life. When she had to work at KFC to earn a living in Peninsular, she did that. She lowered her ego as a degree holder. She fell in love with a man and then the man just turned toxic. She went thru emotional breakdown trying to convince herself to leave that man. She came back to Sabah, stronger than ever. And things began to fall in place for her. I always thought she was the most successful among us. These days, she likes to share motivational quotes in FB. And the good things happen in her life. Her job. Her kids. Her marriage. Her family. You can tell how everything is going smoothly in her life. Do I have to add that she lives in a mansion worth more than RM1 million? It belongs to the parents in law but then again, what are the odds of marrying a normal guy, and when the luck strikes, the next thing you are a millionaire's daughter in law. So you imagine how well things are in her life.

Recently she visited me and had breakfast together. She told she "almost died" from a virus infection and was bedridden for a week. I didn't even know that. Then her staff died from accident at work. She was answerable because it was under her division. I mean, she did not share all that on FB. There certainly many more things happening in her life but she did not share on FB. She might experience the worse kind of emotional breakdown trying to cope with everything but what she shares on FB was the most inspiring quotes for others to read. And then she revealed to me that her marriage is not that simple because her husband constantly demonstrates his satisfactions with silent treatment and she has to always make up to him for the smallest things. Since she is so successful in her career, even her husband couldn't catch up. It makes him feel uncomfortable and he dislikes it when she puts work above family time. But she likes the corporate world and the husband is not too happy so she has to let it go. The most shocking thing that she said to me not directly but in between the lines - that she is actually the one who puts foods on the table. Since the husband is working on contract-base. The economy is not so good so sometimes the husband is not earning for the whole year. Despite all the good things she shows on FB, the story behind it is just known to a few. 

I spent years admiring her life (though I'm not envious either because I have different preference) and many times I felt like a potato. I even felt embarrassed and surprised why she still shows much attention to our friendship. She will make time to meet me and talk to me. I silently thought, she doesn't even need me cos she has a almost-perfect life (as seen in social media). After our last hangout, I got a clearer picture. No one's life is perfect. Neither mine, nor her. 

The lesson for me is - all this time, being grateful for my life is exactly the right thing to do. I'm glad the good life of other people doesn't affect me the bad way. It still finds pride in my own simple life. I still enjoy what I do. I just create my own little world - and believe in it. Though I'm humbled, maybe I'm not always right about that. I'm reminded of the individual battle that we have to face. No one is totally "graduated" from life as long as we are still breathing. So you can't really conclude who is successful, who is not. It's not even about that. It's about MAKING THE BEST out of this life that we have. Enough with the comparison. Maybe if we talk long enough, we will find out we are JUST EVEN. But then who cares? If I once felt like a potato, okay, that's just me. But I don't have the right to treat someone else like a potato cos just like my friend, my life might look good at one corner but that's not the whole story. I still struggle. I still feel down. I still feel abandoned sometimes. I still feel lost. I still feel used and taken advantage of. Just like some people who are just potatoes in my eyes. NO, I'm wrong. I'm not more than them. We are just EVEN.

But it's a good thing ain't it? Can we live life better, now that we know no one is more superior than the other. Lets change our outlook now. We deserve to embrace life more positively knowing that we have equal chance to champion our own life. Lets do that.