My 2010 Rhapsody

I remember writing a post when it was coming to the end of 2009. It was a bitter post. I wanted so much to say goodbye. 2009 wasn’t a good year for me but I could not remember why. Maybe because there were just too many conflicts revolving my job. Yeah, 2009 was filled with job issues. 2010, in the other hands, has too many emotional issues. What do you think? Should I feel impatient to leave this year too? Surprisingly, the answer is No. I am taking my time to see the time slips. I do wish that the time is slower. I want to be totally ready for 2011. Would I ever be ready? Hahaha. You bet. 

2010 is a Very Interesting year for me. Although it brings so much heartaches that I don’t expect, but still it’s a year that gives variety of experiences for me. This year taught me all over again that Time changes things. And speaking of time, sometimes things can just be difference in 1 day, let alone months.  This is also the year that I think I learn the most knowledge about men. I mean, I can even come up with a complete workable theory about Men and Their Nature; cos this year I have learnt a great deal.  If you walk in to my life, even if you don’t leave so courteously, actually I still have the lesson to thank you for. You won’t even know I’m studying your every move. So to all the men that have been in my life this year…you have no idea that what a smart lady I have become. Studying men…don’t you think that’s what ladies should do? We want to understand them so we know how to handle them. Knowledge doesn’t come for free though. I even have to put myself as the “subject of a study case” just to gain real-life relevant knowledge. 

This year gave me so many spiritual roller coasters that were so freaking tough. I experienced distance in faith and regained it back. I also have days where I declared as “Care-Less” because I “disconnected” myself with surrounding and just spent quiet time trying to soul-search again. It sounds really tough right? The worse part is when I thought I wasted so much time dealing with the emotional issues. 

2010 saw it all that I was being a step more open with my online friends. I started using Facebook  where they get to know slightly better things about me, although still not that much. I also started talking in Yahoo Messenger where people could attack me privately with private questions. It was indeed hard to stay very much anonymous when using applications that let you “share more” with people. So if you ask me if I was happy with all that, it was tough to answer No because I am still going to keep using those.  But I can say that it was not as bad as I thought it was. At least I know better how to control things from controlling my life. Those are only tools. You can’t blame the tools if you misuse them and let them ruin your life. Tools don’t have brain. But you do.

2010 saw it how I lost my faith and regained it. Repeatedly. I did not say it openly about losing faith though, because I know it’s just the state of mind and I don’t want people to follow my step. You gotta have faith no matter what.  It was the year I showed some of my biggest strengths and at the same time, saw how I gave in to my weaknesses. All the years I managed to not be fragile again, I broke it in 2010. I finally was in the most fragile state that I’d break anytime.  I saw myself being so influential at one time, and a sober at the rest. 2010 witnessed that I discovered so many weaknesses that I never knew I had. So what do you think? It’s a knock of reality. It’s amazing that we’ve been living with “us” and still don’t really know so much about this “entity” that we are living with. 

My health was superb for 2010. For the first 6 months, I did not deal with ANY kind of sickness at all. That was a very amazing case for me because I was a person of flu and sore throat. I thought that my immunity performed so good that I did not even get a sore throat in 6 months. Usually I get this disease at least once a month because I always get it from people. I am always very susceptible to the virus. Now you know why it was a big deal for me to not get flu in months. Unfortunately, I dealt with 2 kinds of sickness that actually equals to getting flu/cold every month. One was when I had really serious muscle ache when I got up one morning resulting from wrong posture that  lasted for 2 weeks. The pain was so terrible that I could even cry in pain just sitting there not doing anything. The pain on my shoulder and arm was killing me. Luckily I got over it with self treatment by doing the proper kind of stretching everyday.  The second one is the food allergy that I got on 30^th Dec. It was superterrible that I lost “my life” instantly. Suddenly there’s a foreign object that is controlling your body. The rashes appeared on my skin and disappeared  just to appear again in the other area. The itchiness would even make you scratch your skin with knife, not feeling that it would hurt cause your bloody wounds. That’s how bad the sicknesses were. 

My job is doing much better and I become more well-known among new customers. I’m losing my anonymousness little by little and guess what, I don’t know why I think that it’s a good sign if I’m ready to lose more. Hahaha. I think that I’m more professional in what I do and I KNOW WHAT I’M DOING and I usually know what my customers want.  Keeping a customer is 5 times cheaper than getting a new one so keep in that mind 256! Hahahaha. Better things are waiting for me ahead. I must move forward!

My oh My…2010…Despite all that, I am still not giving you a bad label. Many new experiences that I have in my life, come from you. Or maybe maturity that makes the difference. If I were to have this 2010 much younger, maybe I could be cursing and crushing the memories that I have from you. Or maybe 2010 was really an interesting year for me because the next time I face the same experience again, I would know how to handle it. 

I have a confession to make. I left 2010 with “a big mess”. I know that 2011 is not going to be easy since I have a lot of work to “clean the mess” that I brought from 2010. 2011 is not going to be simple either because after having a year like 2010, nothing simple could beat that. Plus…I’m going to make 2011 A BIG YEAR for me. 2011, you are going to witness how I say “thanks” to 2010 and all the years for teaching me for much. 

2011 is going to be a FANTASTIC YEAR in my life. 

NOTE: Sorry for this late post. Better late than never...*giggles.

Interview Before New Year

This is a tag by Rungitom. Thanks for tagging ya. Here's the tag.

But before stepping into 2011, why don't you answer these simple interview questions?

1. Tell me what are the important events that happened to you in 2010?

a)  I made a drastic decision to change my office lot, and I moved for 2 times in months because I want the best spot and yes I settle with the best spot. *winks. The bionic side of me is really unleashed. Hahaha.The fact that I took the risk to shift from A to B, how can that not be memorable.

b) I finally registered account for my Facebook after trying to avoid doing it for almost 2 years!! And also started using Yahoo Messenger. Hahahaa. Whoa you have no idea how much difference these things bring to me life, not to mention the “headache. Hahaha. Kidding.

2.Your favorite hit song for 2010?

Whoa….imagine, it’s already 2010 and people are still producing great songs as if music has only been discovered recently! Hahaha. So much to mention, but the most current one that caught my ears is this Malay number “Kalau Cinta”…I like…it’s a very cute song…hehe. Oh, I put the song on top of my singingbox so I believe you are listening to the song as you read this. Haha

3. What is the thing that really made you happy this year?

That is year is still so much better than last year.

4. There are some regrettable experiences/choices you have made this year, what was it? Care to share?

I don’t like to REGRET anything. For me whatever choices or decisions I made, I took the risk and if things didn’t turn out well, that’s life and that’s a lesson learnt. But if you ask me if I took some bad choices or decisions this year, the answer is Of Course, but remember, I also took some really good decisions. *Grinzzz

5. Any 2010 New Year's resolution that you didn't achieved this year?

Even if Yes, that means 2011 holds so many mysteriously interesting unfold things for me…unachieved resolutions only make me grow impatient to start the New Year. 2011, here I come!

6. What are the strange things that unexpectedly happened to you in 2010?

My sense of fashion has plunged and luckily I am already in the process of lifting it back…*Lols

7. How about your attitude? Did it go more towards positivity or negativity?

This year is the year where I’ve been tested so many times if I really pass the art of positive thinking and luckily, it’s the positive thinking that has helped me so much. It could have been worse if it didn’t happen that way.

8. Will you miss 2010?

Apparently yes, but I’m not turning back. Make me miss you, 2010 but that’s all you can have from me. I will not ask to have you all over again. What’s done is done.

9. So what's your new year's resolution, or things that you want to achieve in 2011. Do you have any?

I want to be GREAT in EVERYTHING I do.

10. Tag 5 bloggers you think, will love to answer this simple interview. :)

I’m tagging my dear blogger friends who are also IRC chatters and also in my Facebook list

1. Lady of Liberty

2. Angelbear

3. Leomicky a.k.a ^Syaitan^

4. LadyKay

5. Wilder

Thanks for this tag because at least you make me start thinking and reflecting the year that I’m going to leave. *giggles.Well, lets hear from the rest of you. :)

*Lols. This is what I like so much about this Calvin...He's so full of himself. Very smart for a  "cartoon kid" like him. Hahahaa

Note: What to know more about my view about 2010 (which would get deeper even a bit on the private side...wait up the coming post(s))

Dealing With The Pinocchios

Whoa…don’t you like the name Pinocchio? Do you know the puppet kid, who was made from wood, wished to be a real boy. His wish was granted, but with one condition. Everytime he lies, his nose will grow longer. So you know, Pinocchio is just a perfect name to the LIARS out there. Oops…are you one?

Some people are just born to be LIARS. Lying is in their blood. In the other hand, the rest adapt to lying latter in their lives. Maybe they think that lying is “ a great adjustment” to make their lives easier and better. How easy it is to say anything that make people believe and get the benefit of their trust before they got caught lying. The truth will prevail eventually. No one can get away with lying. They are just lucky their noses don’t grow everytime they tell a lie. I mean, if they do...- IMAGINE that. 

We all lie at certain degree. It all comes back to the intention. If you lie about something but everyone will get the benefit in the end, maybe people can forgive you for lying. If you lie entirely for your own benefit and you don’t care what’s gonna happen to the people who buy your lies, DAMN…I don’t know what to say. Whether you lie to people when it comes to getting money, or get something for free, or even lie about your status, lie about many things that mislead other people into thinking that you’re someone else you are not – which eventually crush a heart, or put people in trouble after knowing the truth…Uh-Oh, You’re Guilty.

I tell you how I deal with Pinocchios. When we meet new people, there’s always a chance that he/she is one of those Pinocchios. Always leave a space for that possibility that you could be right. Always have a little doubt and suspicion but not to the extent that it stops you from being polite and professional in your work. You can “take the chance” – but small ones. If you gonna put some RM on the line, make sure it won’t make you kill someone if you lose it. Just to find out if this person really deserves your trust. That’s what I do. Sometimes I take a risk, and ready to be cheated or lied to – put something in line and then see what happens. I even did it to my customers who are sometimes “trying to act smart”. Making friends with me a little bit and then did one honest thing and thought they have my trust and used it right away by taking their orders without full payment, thinking that I would tolerate with them after they have been honest one time. They are wrong. I am always cautious. Eventhough I do feel silly sometimes that I give face to some potential liars, but to me it’s better to find out now than later. It saves me a lot of problems in the long run. If they cheated me RM100 for example, I just lost RM100 but they lost SO MUCH MORE than that. Look, who’s smarter here.

And hey, to all the girls. Worried that you are dealing with some serious-criminalized Pinocchios who put their heart and soul in their too-good-to-be-true lies just to get something from you? Learn some tips from the people who are much more experienced than us. The common lie is when guys tell you they have no one when they do have someone. They will lure you with all kinds of nice words or anything that can impress you. They even feed you with I Love You or You Are The Only One I Want To Be With and all the ridiculous stuff that has no truth value whatsoever. When justice takes its toll on them and you found out, they still will use their magic lines lifeline to tell more and more lies so they can still get the advantage of being in your life. What to do with these idiots? Oops…I mean Pinocchios. (Sounds better, right?) JUST LET THEM LIE!!! But this time, with your acknowledgement. It’s a big difference right there. Instead of being in a soap opera with “a puppet with a long nose”, now you become the spectator, enjoying “this puppet” fooling themselves. You see HOW FAR and HOW STUPID they can become with their words and their acts. See HOW MANY MORE LIES they can stand to tell. Come on, ladies. They cheated on you and you just gonna walk out empty-handed? Not without giving them a proper lesson. You gonna let them see HOW THEY GONNA SWALLOW BACK all the LIES. You ladies seen it with your own eyes, that guys would go extra miles just to get something from you, whether it’s your body, it’s money, it’s position or anything. The era has changed and they thought we ladies are still in the cave. In most cases, WE KNOW you guys are lying. You ask us why did we let you guys stay? I just gave you the answer. We want to see HOW SUPER-STUPID you guys can be, and behind that charms, you guys are NOTHING BUT LOSERS, pathetic ones. Trust me, with all the names you deserve to be called, you guys would eventually pick Pinocchio!! (*Lols)

Look…everybody makes mistakes. I lie too. I’m not an angel. The difference between me and the rest of the typical Pinocchios out there, I have a clear conscience of what’s wrong and right. I want to do what’s right. Lying is not gonna help my mission and if I still have to do it, I will make sure it won’t harm anyone but only make the situation better. I will not toy with people’s feelings just to get something. Trust me, if you do very serious lies and never learn from your mistakes, it will come back and haunt you. The most hurtful thing is when you lose someone’s trust. Even when you repent and ask for forgiveness, you would never get the same kind of trust anymore. It’s a total degradation to yourself.

Are you one of those Pinocchios? You won’t know that the one you are lying to actually know that you are lying, every words from your mouth are unreliable. She looks at you nothing more like A Wood Puppet. When the bomb explodes and you find out that actually everyone knows that you’re telling lies – this is the embarrassment that you gonna bring with you for the rest of your life. They let you lie to your maximum stupidity, and you still get nothing in the end because people have stopped listening to you and only wait the day to Swith off the button for you to stop and pick up your stupidity and leave. Not to mention how many curses and swears you receive even while you’re sleeping and how many opportunities will go away from you and how many friends you gonna lose. It’s just LYING. Why do you have to lose so much? Aha, that’s the crap of this whole thing. It’s just LYING. What’s so hard about NOT doing it? Don’t say I don’t warn you. *winks.

Note: Thanks to the creator of Pinocchio. At least I have a “polite” name to call the Liars. Hehehe. Erks… :P

The Token of Chrismas

Last nite's Christmas Eve was well-spent. We could have done many things to fill the day. It's up to us really. All the years I kept questioning why my Christmas was never "that good". I remember writing a poem on that too. I kept looking for the "secrets" why my Christmas was never happier. I did everything to make it complete but I felt like it was never complete.

Last nite, I spent almost 5 hours at the church. Came very early to get the best seat and sat there entertaining my thoughts I remember the good moments when I felt like sitting quietly at the church was the most miraculous moment. Unfortunately, because I think I was still in "unstable state" of feelings and mind, I did not feel that moment. I kept looking around and reflecting what had happened that caused the rages inside me. It's like stepping on the ground but did not feel the ground at all. The Peace was not with me. That's the point. This is the most challenging situation that one can go through. The Enemy Within. Anyway, the choir at the church was Superb. Oh man, how I loved the spirit. They sang it from the heart. "Those who sing well, pray twice." May God bless each and everyone of the choir member who did a very fantastic job, making the nite so alive. It helped a lot. The most powerful line of the was "There's Nothing That God Cannot Do." Thanks a lot for such a wonderful mass. If I keep complaining about my Christmas that was never complete, Well, it won't make it better if I did not attend the Christmas Eve mass. Some people did not go thinking about the crowd and having to wait for hours if they come early, but I ask you again, you call yourself the faithful but you don't even want to make a little sacrifice for such an important date. Ask yourself that.

The mass ended about 11.30 PM so we only have 24 hours restaurant to pick. This was our late nite dinner. Hahaha.

And this was our Christmas black forest cake.

*giggles. Don't be surprised. I have received so many gifts in my life from expensive perfumes, to gold jewellery and even diamond, but my favourite gifts are the cute little ones like this. I likeeee...hehehehehe. Those who know will know what to buy for me...*Lols

This is my Christmas tree at the office. One of the 3 feet was lost, but using my creativity I still manage to make it stand. Hahahaha. I prefer the traditional tree better than new ones out there. I will not change this tree until it's broken or stolen or anything that makes me unable to use it. Hehehe.

One of the best songs for Christmas is Christmas Isn't Christmas Till It Happens In Your Heart. The song says it all. It's not the materials, it's not the rituals, but it's how much you understand the significance of this event and how much this event means to your life. If you can answer all that, congratulations, you are really celebrating Christmas in its purest meaning. One more thing...about me and my "never complete" Christmas...I'm not sure if I found the answer. I just thought of this last night. Maybe I shouldn't expect too much from Christmas. Maybe I just go ahead and enjoy it with the presence of my loved ones and still being able to spend time with them, seeing them healthy and count my every blessing. If I do it right, HOW ON EARTH that it doesn't make my Christmas complete. It even make my life complete. Praise be to God. Thanks for this gift of life. Halleluyah. :)

Do You Deserve The Gift From Santa?

It’s the 24th December 2010. I want to do a sharing that is useful to everyone who reads. Let’s do a little reflection…think for a second…don’t you wonder AS WHAT you are remembered by the people who know you? I mean, do they have something good in mind when they think of you, or is it the opposite? Think of all the good and bad things that you have done to this date, and do a rough estimation if the goods outweigh the bads or is it otherwise. In other words, if Santa were to give a present to all the good people, are you one of them?? Hahaha (I mean Ho ho ho ho..*Lols /me winks at Santa Claus…hahahaha)

One thing that I would like to share with all of you. It has something to do with “the world being round”. When you do something bad to someone, IT WILL COME BACK TO YOU. Do you guys believe that? If you think you are going to get away doing bad things to other people, today I tell you that you’re wrong. This friend’s experience really proves this. She owns a tailor shop as well as an institute. She knows this one guy for quite a while, who then became her customer. That time, the guy was as the peak of his career. He has big house and his business was running very well. He sent a few sets of cloths for his whole family’s baju Raya for that year which cost them around RM700 altogether on tailor service alone. The orders were too many so my friend and her workers had problem to finish them all on the expected time. The guy’s wife was furious because of the lateness, but they still received the clothes before Raya. My friend did all she could, even sent the clothes right on his doorstep on the night before Raya. Maybe because of the lateness, the guy and his wife got back to her. They took the clothes and never paid. Their excuse was – They did not wear the clothes for that Raya because they found out that most of the clothes have fitting problems. Maybe my friend did a mistake too because maybe she did not perform at her best in giving the customer the most satisfactory work. Maybe she failed in time management and others. What would you do if you were in the customer’s shoes? Would you just walk away without paying a penny? Or would you send back the clothes to her to mend so that your family and wear it for other occasion? The thing is, they just told my friend on the phone; about the problems of the clothes and never returned the clothes so my friend could have them fixed. As if they said it just as an excuse to not paying. They must remember something that my friend and her staff had poured their sweat and time to sew the clothes. Even if she failed to meet the expected time but the work was done. The customer was heartless enough to not even use the last bit of humanity to give justice to this matter. My friend recalled how rude she was treated when she sent the clothes at the doorstep. They did not even invite her to come in and the guy just grabbed the clothes at the gate and went in. My friend wouldn’t forget the selfish looks in the couple’s faces. She told me, “It’s okay. God is fair.” Who would have guessed that something untoward happened to the guy’s business months after that. His business collapsed because of some problems and he had to start from the bottom again. The guy even went to me asking information about certain things where he could get opportunities and bargain to start all over again. I was so freaking amazed of HOW his misconduct got back to him. He even went to see my friend back, giving totally the opposite look from his selfishness last time. My friend never spoke about the payment again and the guy said “sorry” for everything and blamed it on his wife and still did nothing to make up the unfinished deal. The next time my friend came to me again, she said this, “See that? I told you God is fair.” I’m still amazed. God shows us in so many ways that we often get back what we do unto others, just in a different form. Maybe most of you call this as Karma but I prefer to give the focus on “What you give, you get back.” Think again when you want to do something evil towards anybody. Just when you think you are living a good life, you think you can look down on others. Everything you have comes from God, so God can take it back anytime He wants.

Reflect what you have done this year so far. As for me, I think I have been in good control of “the outcome” that I bring to other people. I do remember that I sometimes reacted too emotional and maybe hurt some hearts especially my family, but thank God they understand me enough to cope with me. As the person of my job, I did the best for my customers. I recall making many of them so happy with the result of my work and I recall most of them are happy paying the price my work cost them. Of course, there is still room for improvement and that’s my job to perform even better next year. One thing for sure, I keep good hold of MY INTENTIONS this year. In whatever that I do, I always wish good things for people. I keep very little jealousy inside me and I do sincerely want to see people have their good lives because it makes me feel good too. I find that as a very good improvement in myself this year. Yes, I still have weaknesses. I still made some wrong decisions. I still picked the wrong people to get close with. At least I have learnt something and move on. I am just a human being who is trying to do her best. Now that I am reminded that if I do bad things to people, it will hunt me back – so I don’t have any excuse to do bad deeds to people. But to the people who do bad deeds to me, I always have my way to teach you back. My concept is simple. If I can’t be nice to you, I will ignore you rather than making you my enemy. I take it as my weakness that I am unable to please everyone. I’m doing my part to contribute to a peaceful community. If we can’t be friends, lets not be enemies. Psstt…in most cases, Yes we can be friends. *giggles.

So Santa, do I deserve a gift? Hehehe. Well, tell you what, just drop me a little note that “Santa was here” or something, at least there’s a possibility next year I might get myself a little gift. *giggles. I think I am more of a good person, but usually it’s my grumpiness and my mood swing that sometimes make it difficult for people to cope with me. I don’t know why I think, “geez…I can handle that”. :) Trust me I’ll do much better next year. I’ve learnt A LOT this year. I’m going to make another post before New Year, so you guys know WHY I think this year is Very interesting to me. You people have a good time, ok. Remember that Christmas isn’t Christmas, till it happens in your heart. God Bless Everyone. Halleluyah. :)

My 2010 Christmas Card

It's for you... :)

 

Click the picture for bigger view

4 Days To Christmas And I'm Still My Biggest Obstacle

I just woke up a few minutes ago. It's 2.40 AM now. I took a nap hours ago because I was so tired. When I got up, I felt quite bad that I wasted my hours just like that. I could have used it to do a lot of stuff like updating my blog and do other urgent work that is needed by 9.30 AM this morning. Oh man, I'm pretty messed up. What's wrong with me?

My emotion is still so unstable, even how much I tried to deny it. This mind disruption isn't fake and isn't simple. I tried to hide it under my "art of positive thinking" and all of the other theories that I have learnt my whole life, but STILL...something is really messing up my mind. So this is it, right? I imagine a few years ago, when I was praying to God for my future and what I want to achieve in life...I thought I heard a little voice. Whether it came from my own mind, or maybe it came from God. I just didn't know. It said this..."256,I will give you the way to achieve your dreams. I will be by your side. I will help and support you.  Obstacles may come your way every now and then but you can manage it all. All the solutions are within you. The thing is, THE HARDEST of them all is the obstacles that come FROM YOU. YOU are your biggest OBSTACLE."

I must be kidding to be thinking that the biggest obstacle, is...What?? ME??. How can that be? Does that mean that my biggest obstacle is "that simple"? I mean, how hard can "ME" be? I could handle that, for sure!! The things that come from outside can be so cruel but still ME is my biggest obstacle? Oh come on. Of course I can handle it. Piece of cake!!

If so, then EXPLAIN to me why I can't even define what I'm going through now!! I could handle problems in my life. I could handle a lot of things in my life. But my mind is all messed up and I could not see where the root of the problem. All the disappointments, all the unmet expectations and other things that I could not name - are sucking up my energy. I become so helpless and powerless. Now it's 4 days to Christmas, and I'm still crawling in the dark. I felt like I'm losing myself, my direction - although again and again I have found it but how easily that I lost it back. What's wrong with me?

Maybe the voice is right. I AM MY BIGGEST OBSTACLE. Some people might recognize my strong points. Some people might like my appearance. Some people might like my hair or how I dress. I remember the event last weekend where I met many new people, some of them really looked up to me. They wanted to be around me and they wanted to mix up more with me maybe because I could be fun to be around with. Although I didn't attract everyone to do and feel the same, but some who felt that way, felt it for real. I remember one of this lady, who was a few years my senior, but a much more experienced and a successful busineswoman, said to me jokingly. "You seem to have a lot of attraction when these people keep gluing to you." I laughed although I was puzzled why she said that. It doesn't matter. What important is I know that people see something in me. People see some shining qualities in me. But ask me, at this moment, I COULD NOT SEE ANYTHING about me. I'm feeling so pity with myself instead. WHY?? WHY???? Can anybody explain to me??

I have to stop this because I need to do some work. It's 3.07 in the morning. I better get going. It's 4 days to Christmas and I'm still doing soul searching like I did all the years when I was still nowhere. Now that I have gotten good grab of my life, how easy to lose it back. NOW I KNOW. This is why I AM MY BIGGEST OBSTACLE. I am my own worst enemy. I can understand it. I close my the eyes of my heart to my own advantages. All I see are my weaknesses. No wonder. No wonder I am my biggest obstacle.

I don't believe I can't handle this. I WILL HANDLE THIS. I WILL.

The Best Quote of Yesterday: “Tuhan Pandai Kesian Sama Kita”

There’s this one pondan working at the saloon nearby. This pondan is 20 years old and he’s quite good looking even if he chooses to stay a normal guy. He doesn’t groom or dress up that much like a woman unlike some other pondan but his “gender crises” is shown from the way he walks and talks. The fact that he’s a pondan, he’s not ashamed of it. He’s very open and I can see that he has learnt a great deal from life even at that age. He’s one among the Filipinos crowd in my area and he still has his accent and even his Malay is still quite rusty but good enough to communicate with the locals. He’s alone in Sabah and his family is still at the hometown.

Yesterday, he came to my place and had a chit chat. I asked him about his boss, his customers and others. He told me his job is not easy, especially when he has to deal with his boss who is always busy. The last 2 months were challenging for him because the boss didn’t show up and pay his salary. The next thing he learnt was the boss was undergoing treatment for an early detection of a serious disease. He said he never complained or trying to turn his back on his boss although it was tough when the boss did not call or SMS him during the 2 months. He never missed one day from operating the saloon. He opens everyday, no off day and he comes early and comes back late. Any hairstylist won’t want to do that for the boss. Any hairstylist would want to move out and look for a new job at a different saloon especially when the pay is very low and not even the standard pay for a hairstylist. I asked him if he doesn’t want to look for another saloon that can offer him better pay. He told me, “I won’t do that. I pity my boss. She needs me.”

“Kalau sikit susah sudah mau pindah tempat kerja sampai bila pun tidak akan berhenti. Nanti rezeki pun tidak pandai tetap sebab akan ikut mcm kita juga yang tidak tetap pendirian. Kita kena sabar, kena ikhlas kalau bekerja dan jujur walaupun tidak dihargai dan tiada org puji. Aku pasti Tuhan Pandai Kesian Sama Kita juga. Kalau kita susah sekarang pasti dia akan beri rezeki juga dengan kita kalau kita tidak putus asa.”

As he was saying that, I was a bit startled. I could not believe that he could say all that which actually knocked some senses into me too. I really like the part when he said “Tuhan Pandai Kesian Sama Kita”, which I think is a very powerful line for those who feel like they come to the end of their battle. It happens all the time. They think that when life is treating them unfairly, it’s time to call it a quit. He’s right about another thing. When you quit a battle, you’ll move into another and another battle. Life is always about battles. It’s ongoing as long as you’re still alive. If you avoid one battle, it’s still a new battle that you step into. So don’t think by quitting something, you’ll not gonna deal with a new battle. If you keep quitting, when will it end? The challenge is to tackle this battle in hand before you move to another and another and NEVER BE A QUITTER. God will give mercy to those who don’t give up. I believe in that :)

"He's Stealing My Wife!"

A filed a case against C, for seducing B, with the intention of having sexual intercourse with her at Plaza Condominium, Jalan Wan Kadir, Taman Tun Dr Ismail in Kuala Lumpur, between July 2007 and September 2008.

"I was shocked to see Darren Choy arriving with Daphne because I was not told about the man (Darren).

"I was also shocked to see Darren Choy's right hand on her shoulder and kissing her on the left cheek, very close to the ear," said Chong, who is the first prosecution witness in the case, in the proceedings before Magistrate Engku Ahmad Rashdi Engku Abdillah.

This is a very rare case. Usually we hear the cases where 2 women argue over a man, leaving the man looking innocent. This time it's TOTALLY the opposite. A is Ryan Chong, B is Daphne Iking and C is Darren Choy. When this happened, Ryan was Daphne's husband. Now they already got divorced.

C (Darren) faces a maximum jail term of two years, or fine, or both, if convicted. The case is being heard under Section 498 of the Penal Code (Enticing or taking away or detaining with a criminal intent a married woman). (This is the first time that I hear something like this goes to court!)

A (Ryan) said, "I do not want to see him (Darren) use his position as Adidas managing director to seduce Daphne and ruin my entire life."

C (Darren) said, "“I am not rich enough to ‘entice’ her with diamonds and pearls, and other finer things in life. Besides, I don’t think she will fall for that kind of trick, since as I have said before, she’s smart,” said Choy, adding that he has known her for three years.

The most interesting part is when B (Daphne) said, “This is not my case. It’s funny, my name is associated with the case, but I have got nothing to do with it and, therefore, I will not be present at any of the hearings,” she was quoted as saying in media reports.

Since Ryan is now divorced with Daphne, this is like a revenge towards Darren and he's going to get him to hurt his ego as Daphne's husband at the time the "crime" took place. Well...just wait and see how this case goes.

Maybe you men would not think twice before you make any instances towards someone's woman. A lesson to learn :)

"Leave That Man, I Dare You!!" : Part II

Yes I am very furious when I write this. I am very mad at how this world has to toy with us. And I hate how helpless we are because we can only stand to become A VICTIM and we can’t even fight this flow. FUCK OFF!!! Who said we can’t? I’d say FUCK YOU to all the people who says “I’m not guilty. I’m just a victim.” When you find out that you’re wrecking a marriage, I DARE YOU TO STOP IT, you idiot!!!! I’m talking about a peaceful marriage that goes shaky only when you start to come in the picture. When you know a man is taken, STOP IT and don’t go ahead with whatever angelic agenda that you have cos there’s nothing angelic in you when you start to ruin an institution. YOU JUST A DEVIL IN ITS WORST FORM, that even Lucifer is only your number two. I tell you why. You are given so much blessing, women. You are given a beauty that are appreciated by others, and then you are given the brain to think what’s good what’s not. And I tell you what else. YOU ARE GIVEN sensitivity of a woman that God gives ONLY TO WOMEN, when you can easily feel the pain of others and you can easily feel compassion towards others. You would save a kitten from getting drown or you would save the helpless little puppy from getting run by a car – YES, WE WOMEN WOULD DO THIS because of the blessing that God gives us. We have A HEART that feels MORE. The men ARE NOTHING without us. Now you tell me how do you use your gifts. I don’t blame you for looking for love. You only want to look for the man that God made for you.

That’s why I’m writing this post to cry out to all the ladies out there. I heard a lot of cases of broken marriage because of the 3rd person. I feel so sad. I feel soo soo sad. Although most of these people don’t even know me, but I feel sorry for them. A friend was divorced by her husband of 10 years. One day she’s the queen, the next day she’s just a garbage. I know that a problem in a marriage is not as simple as we look at it. Problems in marriage can get very complicated that only the 2 people know about it. I cry out that LETS NOT BE THE REASON why 2 people, who are once in love, separate and lead each other’s way. LETS NOT BE THE REASON WHY the sacred vows before God are broken and violated. I BEG YOU, ladies. Just forgive these men for being an asshole once. After you find out that he’s been lying to you and still carry on with him and let him leave his woman, you’re opening a firehole for yourself, ladies. THIS MAN IS NOT WORTH IT. If he does something like that to his woman, he would do something even more horrible to you because you ALLOW HIM to continue to be that asshole. You get me?

I’m using this approach because I want you ladies to start looking at this in a bigger picture. Yes, your dream might be crushed if you leave him, but if you don’t, you crush so many dreams that happen before you come. It’s not worth it. People have gone through so much to still be together and you come as a poison and make another lady turned into a rubbish to the man who promised her the world. If you think that the other lady is just no one for you to do this favour to, THIS IS NOT ABOUT THE OTHER LADY. This is about your integrity as a human being. God will repay you if you do your part to preserve a good element that we still have on this earth. YOU CAN’T RUIN THEIR MARRIAGE. They are many ladies out there who are wetting their pillow with tears every night because of what you did. This is not how you prove “how dangerous” you are. INSTEAD, you should be STRONG ENOUGH to walk out from a man’s life to teach him the lesson that he should never betray his woman. If you can do that, that’s DANGEROUS. THAT’S HOT. THAT’S BEAUTIFUL. THAT’S POWERFUL. Then only I can say you’re using your assets the right way.

How many of you who are still contemplating of what to do when you find yourself trapped between two people who are tied with marriage vows. You take this post as a motivation. Yes I know it hurts so deeply. I know that you would even cry to sleep and cry again when you wake up. I know the pain is so real if you start to love the man. TRY to imagine this. WHAT IF you are in the lady’s place, whose man is stolen by someone else, who is in your place now? Imagine your hopes are destroyed in a glimpse of eyes. Just the thought of it makes your breath run short, right? STOP IT. It’s time to do something good. TRUST ME GOD will repay you and give you back something much better than what you have let go.

THIS LIFE is just a playground, people. Imagine that. God wants to see who can stay righteous and correct their ways. Or maybe if you’re selfish enough, don’t need to think about others. Just think that you want to do the right thing. I don’t want to scare you with Karma because that shouldn’t be the reason why you do good things. You do good things because of the sake of the goodness itself. Who cares about KARMA. What I believe is when you are good, you will get a reward from your Creator.

LADIES, WE ARE NOT A HOME-WRECKER. We are honourable ladies who do the right thing. We have education. We have religion. We DON’T break people’s marriage. I’m sure when you get married one day, you don’t want that to happen to you too. Let’s do the right thing. THANKS.

NOTE: Sorry for my bad language in this post. To be honest with you guys, I’ve been in the position to be a home-wrecker to some marriage. I feel sorry for the ladies affected and I feel it even more when my own friends experience it. I corrected my ways before it’s too late. I see that men can be loyal but they still pick to be disloyal when they find another lady who is willing to be the partner in crime. They are victimizing you, don’t you know it? Don’t let them make a fool of yourself. If the men need some lesson, go ahead and teach them. Anyway, in certain cases, yes, some marriages are bound to end because of so many problems. I believe that destiny has a way of making you guys be together eventually, in a proper way. Just don’t go ruin the marriage and create a make believe destiny on another lady’s grievance. And to the MEN who think with their dicks…I have a message for you guys. You guys can never take advantage of us. We have a way of teaching you how to put the brain back to where it belongs. MEND YOUR WAYS before it’s too late.