Isn't Our Time Running Out?

Sepedih-pedihnya satu kebenaran tu, dia tetap fakta. Same like hayat manusia. Life ni begitulah bestnya kan? Tapi rupanya sementara ja. Sometimes just the thought of it hurts enough. Sakitnya untuk terima yang each and everyone of us will never escape this. Pernah juga beberapa kali sia terfikir, Kenapa lah sia kena lahir di dunia ni? Now I have to experience quitting it. O man it hurts.

Biarpun masih optimis dengan hari2 yang mendatang, tapi kepedihan tu slowly kita telan. Saban tahun, umur meningkat, bukankah bermaksud kita MENGHAMPIRI masa tu? Every birthday celebration is just, Yeahh, you are a step closer to your ending!! Sakit kan? Sakit bila fikir terpaksa kau tinggalkan awesomeness of this life and the people that you love. Fuh, better don't go there.

My point now is, Get realistic. Stop acting like you don't know it. Evaluate dengan cara yang practical. Like this hoarding habit of mine. Berapa lama lagi sia mau simpan semua benda2 tu? Yang one day I might wanna use them but I have not used them for the past 8 years (for example). Should I allow things from dat 8 years ago to occupy more space in my life? Simpan habuk dan menyumbang kepada timbunan kesemakan dalam life sia yang obviously needs more space untuk benda2 baru. This used to be heartless but maybe not anymore. Tomorrow I will let go a lot of stuff from my hoard habits. They are losing their values. Shall I need them one day, I will have to take the risk and just believe that I know where to find. I can no longer rely untuk "one day" that has not come at least in 8 years ago (just putting a number to describe some of the stuff I've been keeping can be that old or even older). Worse is, I don't even remember I have them. I just know there is a clutter of old stuff at the backyard but I can't recall what are they. Terrible, isn't it?

Maybe sia terima kenyataan yang The rest of my life is what I have left. Sia sudah lalui zaman budak2, zaman remaja and sudah merasai tahun2 di zaman dewasa. My time shouldn't be that long compared to the random kids yang sia nampak berlarian di padang sekolah. I cannot think like them. Thats why sia ambil satu plastik hitam, stuff my baju2 yang sia suka tapi sia tidak pakai lagi. Ada yang sia masih muat tapi sia ndamau pakai lagi sebab banyak lagi baju sia yang baru dan belum dipakai. So sia paksa diri untuk isi tu plastik tanpa fikir panjang. You know why? Sebab sia realistik yang sia belum tentu ada another 50 years untuk pakai tu baju2 semua. Lagipun sia sentiasa beli baju baru. Kenapa begitu clingy dengan benda2 silam, right?

I just want to remind myself once again that, this is how it's done. Jangan terlalu fikir BILA, tapi stop ignoring the fact that we have done our Alpha, and the law says we must have our Omega. If you ask me how do I feel about it? Not necessarily bad. At least tidaklah sia terlalu berlengah. At least sia happy bila sia spend extra time at work. Remind myself again, this is what I love. I pick this and God gives it to me. And di umur-umuran sia sekarang ni, dengan banyak2 little studies or social experiments yang sia bikin, kita nampak macamana Things Change. Jangan pelik, jangan gelabah, dan JANGAN expect semua benda akan sama. Sama macam diri kamu sendiri. Kamu fikir kamu masih sentiasa cool macam dulu? No way. Tettt. Silap. What I mean is kamu cool dengan cara yang berbeza sekarang. Embrace it. Quit meracau kenapa semua keliling kamu tidak sama. Ada kamu say thanks sama benda2 awesome yg baru dalam life kamu? Itulah pampasan dia. 

Bah buli kah kita pandang ke depan ja mula dari sekarang? Ada juga sia terfikir mau quit this blog and maybe do something else masa sia free. Itupun sia sudah cukup bertahan o kan? Semua kawan2 bloggers yang lain sudah give up on blogging. Why am I still here? Hehe :PP  Well, I'm preparing myself to do something bigger in my life next. Mau push lebih and mau achieve lebih. Diri sia yang kerdil ni, sometimes sia terfikir juga, sia larat kah? I think I do :)

Note: Who knows one day sia akan tired jadi si 256, kan?